The Raccoons Quotes
Melissa: (To the Pigs) My, you three look dashing!
Pig One: I hope we look as dashing when we're crashing!
Pig One: I hope we look as dashing when we're crashing!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Cyril: There's $50,000 in prize money up for grabs in that pylon race! And you're going to win it!
Pig Three: (mumbling) Or die trying!
Pig Three: (mumbling) Or die trying!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Cyril: Of all the rotten luck! Before that hotshot Troy Malone turned up, I had this air race in the bag! We were the only entry!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Ralph: Face it Ralph. Some guys make the news, and some guys just write it down.
TV Show: The Raccoons
Ralph: What happened to you three?
Pig One: It's a sad and a painful story.
Pig Two: Oh yeah. We didn't even see the cement truck! No, not at all!
Pig Three: And what do you think the chances are of being hit by a meteorite?
Ralph: Zero. What can I do for you?
Pig One: We want to place an ad. For a pilot.
Ralph: A pilot? The race'll be over before the Standard comes out.
Pig Two: Well that's not our problem. But the boss can't say we didn't try!
Pig One: It's a sad and a painful story.
Pig Two: Oh yeah. We didn't even see the cement truck! No, not at all!
Pig Three: And what do you think the chances are of being hit by a meteorite?
Ralph: Zero. What can I do for you?
Pig One: We want to place an ad. For a pilot.
Ralph: A pilot? The race'll be over before the Standard comes out.
Pig Two: Well that's not our problem. But the boss can't say we didn't try!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Cedric: Gee Ralph, are you sure you're up to this? You haven't logged all that many flying hours.
Ralph: Maybe not Cedric. But I've had it up to here with Troy Malone. I'm going to give him a run for his money.
Cyril: It's not his money. It's my money. Now get out there and bring back that fifty grand. And don't wreck my plane!
Ralph: Maybe not Cedric. But I've had it up to here with Troy Malone. I'm going to give him a run for his money.
Cyril: It's not his money. It's my money. Now get out there and bring back that fifty grand. And don't wreck my plane!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Bert: You were TERRIFIC! That's the best crash I ever saw!
Ralph: Huh... thanks Bert... I think.
Ralph: Huh... thanks Bert... I think.
TV Show: The Raccoons
Ralph: Troy! Pull up a chair and join us!
Melissa: Yes!
Troy Malone: Oh no, I just came to say goodbye. Besides, three's a crowd.
Melissa: Yes!
Troy Malone: Oh no, I just came to say goodbye. Besides, three's a crowd.
TV Show: The Raccoons
Pig One: Mission accomplished sir!
Cyril: Amazing! With you three it's usually mission impossible!
Cyril: Amazing! With you three it's usually mission impossible!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Bonneville: I said, give me the car keys!
Pig Two: No way jose. This is the boss' car.
Pig Three: He'd send us to the smokehouse if we let anyone drive it!
Pig Two: No way jose. This is the boss' car.
Pig Three: He'd send us to the smokehouse if we let anyone drive it!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Bert: So that's Bonneville huh? Is he giving you a hard time Cedric?
Cedric: Well...
Bert: Come on Cedric, I can see what's happening! And you've only got two choices.
Cedric: I'll take the orange soda Bert.
Bert: No, I mean two choices in dealing with Bonneville!
Cedric: Well...
Bert: Come on Cedric, I can see what's happening! And you've only got two choices.
Cedric: I'll take the orange soda Bert.
Bert: No, I mean two choices in dealing with Bonneville!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Cedric: Oh Bert! Am I glad to see you! I thought you were Bonneville!
Bert: Nah! I'm much better looking.
Bert: Nah! I'm much better looking.
TV Show: The Raccoons
Bert: Cyril! Cyril! Open up! Let me in!
Cyril: Huh? I'll let you in for a lifetime of trouble if you don't get out of here pronto! It's the middle of the night!
Bert: Cedric and Bonneville are in trouble!
Cyril: Don't go away!
Cyril: Huh? I'll let you in for a lifetime of trouble if you don't get out of here pronto! It's the middle of the night!
Bert: Cedric and Bonneville are in trouble!
Cyril: Don't go away!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Cyril: Pigs! If anything happens to my son I'll hold you responsible!
Pig One: Us? We were sleeping boss!
Cyril: See? They admit it.
Pig One: Us? We were sleeping boss!
Cyril: See? They admit it.
TV Show: The Raccoons
Bonneville: Look Cedric... maybe I am a stinker. Maybe... maybe I'm sorry.
Cedric: Why all of a sudden?
Bonneville: Because I've got no more time. Because I'll be... gone in the morning. Like always. Can we be... I mean... can we be friends?
Cedric: Maybe... we can try!
Cedric: Why all of a sudden?
Bonneville: Because I've got no more time. Because I'll be... gone in the morning. Like always. Can we be... I mean... can we be friends?
Cedric: Maybe... we can try!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Bert: WOW!
Cyril: Cedric! What's happening here?
Cedric: Something that happens once in a blue moon Pop!
Cyril: Cedric! What's happening here?
Cedric: Something that happens once in a blue moon Pop!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Lady Baden-Baden: I envy you Melissa.
Melissa: Me?
Lady Baden-Baden: You have a career. You have purpose. A direction in life. Me? I just flutter about on society business.
Melissa: Me?
Lady Baden-Baden: You have a career. You have purpose. A direction in life. Me? I just flutter about on society business.
TV Show: The Raccoons
Cyril: I might as well play golf on the Sahara Desert, the amount of time I spend in sand traps!
Pig One: Sand Wedge again sir?
Cyril: I'll turn you into a sandwich if you don't watch your lip Pig!
Pig One: Sand Wedge again sir?
Cyril: I'll turn you into a sandwich if you don't watch your lip Pig!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Pig One: I just had a brilliant idea. I know how we can make some easy money.
Pig Three: Oh Lloyd... that's my favourite kind!
Pig Three: Oh Lloyd... that's my favourite kind!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Mr Knox: Er, what's with the disguises boys? Does Mr Sneer disapprove of your catering business?
Pig One: Oh no, the boss backs us all the way!
Pig Two: Yeah usually he's on our backs.
Pig Three: Er, besides, we're not in disguise!
Pig Two: No, no, it's er, it's er, protection from the sun!
Pig One: The ozone layer, it's breaking down you know. And we're very sensitive to ultraviolet rays!
Mr Knox: I see...
Pig One: Oh no, the boss backs us all the way!
Pig Two: Yeah usually he's on our backs.
Pig Three: Er, besides, we're not in disguise!
Pig Two: No, no, it's er, it's er, protection from the sun!
Pig One: The ozone layer, it's breaking down you know. And we're very sensitive to ultraviolet rays!
Mr Knox: I see...
TV Show: The Raccoons
Lady Baden-Baden: Knoxie and I had a terrible fight, in public no less! He demanded I resign from my job!
Bert: But why would he want you to resign?
Lady Baden-Baden: That's exactly what I asked him! He said women have no place in the working world?
Melissa: How could he say such a thing in this day and age?
Lady Baden-Baden: It's his upbringing Melissa. Old world, old values, old money. I told him to accept me as I am, or leave. He left, and tomorrow is... our anniversary! Oh Melissa, I'm so unhappy! (she sobs)
Bert: But why would he want you to resign?
Lady Baden-Baden: That's exactly what I asked him! He said women have no place in the working world?
Melissa: How could he say such a thing in this day and age?
Lady Baden-Baden: It's his upbringing Melissa. Old world, old values, old money. I told him to accept me as I am, or leave. He left, and tomorrow is... our anniversary! Oh Melissa, I'm so unhappy! (she sobs)
TV Show: The Raccoons
Pig Two: Oh it's a disaster! Our first catering contract just went up in smoke!
Pig Three: No, he just went up the stairs!
Pig Three: No, he just went up the stairs!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Bert: Don't cry Lady Baden-Baden.
Lady Baden-Baden: Oh I'm not, it's the onions. Oh, but I do miss Knoxie so.
Melissa: I'm sure you and Mr Knox can work things out.
Lady Baden-Baden: You manage a career and a marriage Melissa. How do you do it?
Melissa: Well, a little understanding, a little support and a little compromise... from both of us!
Lady Baden-Baden: Compromise... not one of Knoxie's strong points.
Lady Baden-Baden: Oh I'm not, it's the onions. Oh, but I do miss Knoxie so.
Melissa: I'm sure you and Mr Knox can work things out.
Lady Baden-Baden: You manage a career and a marriage Melissa. How do you do it?
Melissa: Well, a little understanding, a little support and a little compromise... from both of us!
Lady Baden-Baden: Compromise... not one of Knoxie's strong points.
TV Show: The Raccoons
Cyril: (Whilst playing golf) You're crazy to break up with Lady Baden-Baden. Just because she took a job Knox! Drat.
Mr Knox: But sir, where I come from a gentlemen would never let his wife take a job. It's tradition.
Cyril: Lucky shot Knox! The heck with tradition! You can't kiss off a perfectly good marriage because of your pigheaded prime! You're living in the modern world Knox. The woman has a right to work if she wants. Rats! Besides, you shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. You're getting a second income out of it!
Mr Knox: But sir, where I come from a gentlemen would never let his wife take a job. It's tradition.
Cyril: Lucky shot Knox! The heck with tradition! You can't kiss off a perfectly good marriage because of your pigheaded prime! You're living in the modern world Knox. The woman has a right to work if she wants. Rats! Besides, you shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. You're getting a second income out of it!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Lady Baden-Baden: (As the train she is riding on disappears down a tunnel) Knoxiiieeee! I looooovvvveee yooooou!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Pig Two: Knox uses astrology to foresee the future!
Cyril: Well you three won't have one if you don't start talking sense.
Pig One: We'll do better than that sir! We'll talk dollars and cents!
Cyril: Well you three won't have one if you don't start talking sense.
Pig One: We'll do better than that sir! We'll talk dollars and cents!
TV Show: The Raccoons
Cyril: Bananas it is then! Buy boatloads, buy plantations, buy republics! Go bananas buying bananas boys! Hehe, that's a good one. Write that down.
TV Show: The Raccoons