Charmed Quotes

[Piper and Leo are down behind the bar. Piper giggles. Piper's cell phone rings and she pops up, out of breath to answer it]
Piper: Hello?
Phoebe: Hey, did you make the potion?
Piper: Potion? P-P-Paige is making the potion. [Leo pops up beside Piper and starts kissing her neck]
Piper: And I have ten glorious minutes then I have to have my herbs.
Phoebe: Great, because I need your help fast. Karen's gonna get fired unless we get her advice column in by 8: 00 tonight.
Piper: Uh-huh.
Phoebe: So what would tell a twenty-eight year old woman who's still living in her parents house because she's afraid of living alone?
Piper: I'd tell her to get a life.
Phoebe: How can I write that? We fight demons every day. How can I tell her that there's nothing to be afraid of, you know? (Piper makes a noise as Leo disappears behind the bar again, smiling.) What are you doing, Piper?
Piper: I am taking my own advice.
Phoebe: Eww.

TV Show: Charmed
[Piper and Leo hear a turkey gobble and look to see Phoebe getting out of her car carrying the turkey]
Phoebe: A little help here.
Piper: What are you doing with that thing?
Phoebe: Well, first I'm gonna kill it and then I'm gonna stuff it.
Piper: You are not bringing that filthy fowl in the house.
Phoebe: Yes, I am. Thanksgiving's early this year.

TV Show: Charmed
[Piper and Leo stand over Wyatt's crib looking down at him]
Piper: He's so... innocent. If only he had any idea what Mommy and Auntie Paige did today.
Leo: [to Wyatt] They turned a very bad man to a very big tree.

TV Show: Charmed
[Piper walks into the living room to see Phoebe and Paige wearing beauty masks]
Piper: Ah.
Phoebe: What?
Piper: Oh, my God. You two could scare the hair off a cat. No demons dare drop by here.

TV Show: Charmed
[Piper's morning sickness is causing her to burp small orbs of white light]
Paige: [to Leo] Okay, is that normal?
Leo: All this arguing is probably just upsetting the baby.
Piper: [indicating size with her hands] Leo, the baby is an inch long. All this arguing is upsetting the mommy.

TV Show: Charmed
[Prue and Piper just find out Leo is a Whitelighter]
Prue: What is he again?
Phoebe: He's a Whitelighter. You know, kinda like Peter Pan and Tinkerbell without the wings and the tutu.

TV Show: Charmed
[Prue has just changed back from being a dog. Piper is scratching Prue's head]
Prue: What are you doing?
Piper: I think you've got fleas.
Prue: You know what? That's so not funny because I think I do.

TV Show: Charmed
[Prue, Piper and Phoebe have been outed on national TV and are receiving interview requests up the wazoo]
Piper: So, what do you think? Should we go with Oprah, or Barbra? Barbra makes you cry. We go with Oprah.

TV Show: Charmed
[to Leo]
Piper: [smiling] I'll just go make you some more coffee.
Phoebe: [grinning] And I'll bring it to you.

TV Show: Charmed
[upon meeting Grams for the first time]
Paige: No offense, but aren't you supposed to be dead?
Grams: Oh, I'm over that.

TV Show: Charmed
[Witch doctor appears dressed in a suit]
Witch Doctor: How may I be of service?
Paige: Are you a witch doctor?
Witch Doctor: Let me guess. You were expecting someone with a bone through the nose and shrunken head necklace, perhaps?
Phoebe: Yeah, actually. Yeah. Yeah. [Paige nods in agreement]

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[Wyatt has shrunken Piper and Leo into a doll house size of the Manor]
Piper: OK... let me handle Wyatt. This requires a mother's touch... Wyatt Matthew Halliwell! You stop this nonsense right now!

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: *Hey*! Don't call me sweetie! You can't imprison someone and then call them sweetie!

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: [about Cole] He's soul-searching... or off searching for a soul.

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: [about Leo's spell] "We harken ye"? What are we trying to summon a leprechaun here?

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: [about Paige] Dead? What do you mean she's dead?
Leo: Don't worry. The dwarves are all over it.
Phoebe: The dwarves?
Leo: Piper cast a spell that wound up summoning the descendents of the seven dwarves. Actually, they prefer to be called little people now.

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: [about possessed shoes] Cole, these boots may be made for walkin, but they're NEVER walkin' back to you buddy.

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: [Prue telekinetically shuts the door on Phoebe] Hey! We've had this discussion. You're not allowed to use your active power on me, until I have an active power to use on you.

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Phoebe: [referring to Zankou who now has the Book of Shadows] What do you think he wants?
Paige: [laughs] Our heads on a platter.

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Phoebe: [singing] Oh, I'm making soup for Cole, he'll eat it in a bowl, I guess that's my new role, making soup for Cole.

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: [to Spencer Ricks] You know what? You're a turkey! And turkeys don't write columns. [she throws the potion at Spencer and he turns into a turkey]
Phoebe: But they do make delicious dinners!

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: 28 minutes, 33 seconds. [Piper looks at her]
Piper: Really? We ran that long?
Phoebe: No, that's how long you've been comparing Leo and Dan.
Piper: I haven't been comparing - I've just been... talking.
Phoebe: Non-stop.

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: Anyone got a vanquish in their pocket

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Phoebe: Are you making spaghetti sauce?
Piper: No, that's demon blood.

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Phoebe: AT&T, Power of Three.

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: Can you do anything about this thunder? 'Cause it's making me nuts.
The Seer: I have no sway over the weather. I do have a friend who works with the wind, but she's out of town.

TV Show: Charmed

Phoebe: Come on, you don't think we'll be 60 and still living together, sharing clothes and a cat.
Piper: Well now that you put it that way, no, I don't want to live with you anymore.

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Phoebe: Drake? Are you okay?
Drake Robin: Drake? Who's Drake? I'm Robin Hood... of Nottingham.

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Phoebe: Go away horny tom cats.

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Phoebe: Go to hell.
Cole: We're already here.

TV Show: Charmed