Ugly Betty Quotes

[Daniel, having lunch with Claire, takes away her glass of wine. Claire orders Veal Marsala.]
Daniel The alcohol burns off.
Claire: So give me back the glass and set fire to me when I'm done.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Betty[to Henry]: It's so stupid. You know, I come into Manhattan every single day for work, and it's at times like these I feel like the E train dropped me off at Mars or something.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Wilhelmina[on the phone): Nico, I said you can only call for emergencies. What do you want? No, you can't submit my apartment for Pimp Yo House!

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Betty: He could be deported?
Immigration Lawyer: Very strong possibility, yes.
Betty: But he has a family. He pays taxes. He's a Mets fan…
Hilda: He's in Oprah's book club!

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Wilhelmina: I hate it when she's smiles. It's so... metallic.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Betty: Are you tired of sticking you finger down your throat? Now you can lose weight the easy way! Ask me how!

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Grace: Julie now has a husband, two kids and a dog.
Daniel: Oh, that's nice.
Grace: In her mind. She's in a mental institution.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Alexis: It's complicated coming back from the dead.
Wilhelmina: Oh, please. Donna Karan does it every three years.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Grace: Maybe I should stand out in the snow for three hours and cry icicle tears.
Daniel: Worked on that one for a while?
Grace: Twelve years.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Joel: Have we met?
Wilhelmna: We're not even meeting now.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Wilhelmina: Animal rights versus fashion rights: just who is right?

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Amanda: The human piñata look may be all the rage in Queens, but in Soho they'll arrest you for crimes against humanity.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Betty[to Walter]: You're not a rock star. You play flute in a Jethro Tull tribute band.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Sofia[to Daniel]: You might forget which emaciated, half-naked woman to put on your cover. Oh, and your cover story, "10 Ways to Lose Thighs and Get Guys"? So empowering!

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Marc: You must've had some weekend. A straight man bought you shoes. I peeked, and maybe tried them on.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Marc: Drinking out of body parts makes me all pukey.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Gina: I see I'm not the only one who's doing some last-minute Thanksgiving shopping.
Betty: A carton of cigarettes and vodka?
Gina: You have your tradition and I have mine.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Daniel: Thanksgiving without family would be... Thursday.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Marc: I have to haul my well-toned ass to Schenectady, eat cranberry sauce in the shape of a can and tell my family all about my girlfriend who lives up in Canada.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Marc: You do not say no to Sarah Jessica Parker! She's the Holy Grail of Fashion!
Christina: I know!
Marc: And this is your big chance! And my big chance: to meet her husband, Ferris Bueller Parker.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Claire: Oh, my. What a cute little house. I can put it right in my pocket.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Constance: So you're the one.
Claire: I beg your pardon?
Constance: You're the ho that's been stealing my man.
Claire: It's unlikely that we will have the same man in common. We certainly don't have the same hairdresser.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Daniel[to Grace] A woman who likes sex three times a night and doesn't like to cuddle? Where have you been all my life?

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Claire: This is the first time I've been to one of these parties sober. I used to always think there were twice as many people.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Marc: Trust me. If she had hidden cameras in here, I'd have been fired a long time ago.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
[Daniel wakes up in Betty's bed.]
Daniel: And... where did you sleep?
Betty: In your arms!
Daniel: What?
Betty: Just kidding! On the couch, downstairs.
Daniel: Ah... good. I mean... uh... thanks.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Wilhelmina: Poor people are so cheap.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Wilhemina[to a taxi driver]: What'd you drive in the old country — a goat?
Taxi Driver: I do not have to drive nasty person.
Wilhelmina: Fine, leave him [Marc] here.
Taxi Driver: No, YOU. OUT!

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Wilhelmina Do you have any money?
Marc: I only have $17 in my account. We could go to the bank, but it would just be a social call.

TV Show: Ugly Betty
Betty And for your information, that cover you shot with Courtney Love coming out of rehab in a wheelbarrow full of pills was our lowest-selling issue in 17 years!

TV Show: Ugly Betty