Drawn Together Quotes
Suck My Taint Girl: Look, Make-A-Point Land!
Wooldoor: Where? I can't see it.
Foxxy: It's right over there, between Why-You-So-Bitter-About-Being-Canceled Land and You-Had-Three-Or-Four-Seasons-You-Should-Be-Happy-With-What-You-Got-Most-Shows-Don't-Even-Get-That Land.
Wooldoor: Where? I can't see it.
Foxxy: It's right over there, between Why-You-So-Bitter-About-Being-Canceled Land and You-Had-Three-Or-Four-Seasons-You-Should-Be-Happy-With-What-You-Got-Most-Shows-Don't-Even-Get-That Land.
TV Show: Drawn Together
Foxxy: [in a confessional] Now, the only one we needed was Toot, so we set off on our journey to find her, a journey of excitement and adventure, mystery and mayhem, love and loss, a journey that carried us to far-away lands and taught us so much about what was right here inside us all along. A journey which would change us all forever. And then we found her fat ass.
TV Show: Drawn Together
Xandir: [while being imprisoned in a dungeon] I haven't seen this many shit-covered rodents since my last colonoscopy.
TV Show: Drawn Together
Suck My Taint Girl: I'm, like, the taintiest fan of Drawn Together ever. I tain't missed an episode!
TV Show: Drawn Together
Network Head: It's not that I dislike the Drawn Together gang. It's that I hate those motherfuckers!
TV Show: Drawn Together
Foxxy: Guys, I solved a mystery.
Clara: The only mystery you've ever solved is the mystery of the empty uterus. [Everybody except Foxxy laughs]
Foxxy: If that's true, then how did I found out that the Drawn Together had been canceled?
Wooldoor: C-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-canceled?
Clara: That's ridiculous!
Captain Hero: Girl, you crazy.
Spanky: Poppycock!
Foxxy: Oh, really? Then why can I say, "You can all fuck my titties with your shit-covered cocks, you cum-guzzling faggots" without being bleeped?
Spanky: Yeah! How the fuck is... Whoa! I just said "fuck!"
Captain Hero: Fuck! Oh, well, I'll be darned.
Toot: Dick-gobbling, blood-soaked, ass-eating turd taster! Whoo-hoo! This is fun!
Clara: The only mystery you've ever solved is the mystery of the empty uterus. [Everybody except Foxxy laughs]
Foxxy: If that's true, then how did I found out that the Drawn Together had been canceled?
Wooldoor: C-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-canceled?
Clara: That's ridiculous!
Captain Hero: Girl, you crazy.
Spanky: Poppycock!
Foxxy: Oh, really? Then why can I say, "You can all fuck my titties with your shit-covered cocks, you cum-guzzling faggots" without being bleeped?
Spanky: Yeah! How the fuck is... Whoa! I just said "fuck!"
Captain Hero: Fuck! Oh, well, I'll be darned.
Toot: Dick-gobbling, blood-soaked, ass-eating turd taster! Whoo-hoo! This is fun!
TV Show: Drawn Together
Wooldoor: This is horrible! We're canceled and fake. Just like my child support checks.
TV Show: Drawn Together
Clara: Never trust a Jew producer. I'm obviously a real Disney princess. If I weren't, why would I be so much better than all you people and Foxxy?
Foxxy: Maybe the Jew Producer was tellin' the truth. I mean, Clara, you may look like a Disney princess, but how many Disney princesses have done the things you done done? [cut to various shots of Clara doing un-princess-like things] And how many times you seen Josie and the Pussycats do what I doed? [cut to various shots of Foxxy doing things not befitting of Josie and the Pussycats]
Captain Hero: Now, Foxxy, let's not jump to any conclusions here.
Foxxy: C'mon, Captain Hero, how many real superheroes do you know that bang corpses?
Captain Hero: I don't know. Molly, how many superheroes HAVE you been with? [cut to various shots of Molly in sexual encounters with various superheroes, the last one in which Batman can be seen fellating Robin on a toilet]
Foxxy: Maybe the Jew Producer was tellin' the truth. I mean, Clara, you may look like a Disney princess, but how many Disney princesses have done the things you done done? [cut to various shots of Clara doing un-princess-like things] And how many times you seen Josie and the Pussycats do what I doed? [cut to various shots of Foxxy doing things not befitting of Josie and the Pussycats]
Captain Hero: Now, Foxxy, let's not jump to any conclusions here.
Foxxy: C'mon, Captain Hero, how many real superheroes do you know that bang corpses?
Captain Hero: I don't know. Molly, how many superheroes HAVE you been with? [cut to various shots of Molly in sexual encounters with various superheroes, the last one in which Batman can be seen fellating Robin on a toilet]
TV Show: Drawn Together
Jew Producer: You don't talk much, do you, I.S.R.A.E.L.?
I.S.R.A.E.L.: I.S.R.A.E.L. talks when I.S.R.A.E.L. has something to say.
I.S.R.A.E.L.: I.S.R.A.E.L. talks when I.S.R.A.E.L. has something to say.
TV Show: Drawn Together
Foxxy: You out your fuckin' mind! I said fuck, and they didn't even beep it! Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! What about shit? What about cunt? What about shitcunt? No beeps! They ain't beepin' the curse words! [to Wooldoor] Go on, try it! Say something!
Wooldoor: Okay. Uh, schwartza. Mud baby. Smoked Irishman. Ink face!
Foxxy: Nah, dummy, they never censor racism. I'm talking about words like "shitcunt".
Wooldoor: Ooh, I could never say that. Those are bad words.
Wooldoor: Okay. Uh, schwartza. Mud baby. Smoked Irishman. Ink face!
Foxxy: Nah, dummy, they never censor racism. I'm talking about words like "shitcunt".
Wooldoor: Ooh, I could never say that. Those are bad words.
TV Show: Drawn Together
Spanky: Well, like a colostomy bag, I'm on Foxxy's side. I liked being a reality TV star.
Wooldoor: Yeah! We need to get our show back. Otherwise, I'll have to go back to my old gig: exposing myself to children, and that union has THE worst health plan!
Xandir: Fine! Then I guess we are splitting up. How do we decide who gets the mystery van?
Toot: [giving them the finger] Later, assbags! [drives off in the mystery van]
Wooldoor: Yeah! We need to get our show back. Otherwise, I'll have to go back to my old gig: exposing myself to children, and that union has THE worst health plan!
Xandir: Fine! Then I guess we are splitting up. How do we decide who gets the mystery van?
Toot: [giving them the finger] Later, assbags! [drives off in the mystery van]
TV Show: Drawn Together
Spanky: If I can't fart or vomit or fill up an ice tray with the afterbirth of Foxxy's miscarriage and hand them out as ice pops to terminally-ill children on my hospital tours without making some kind of point, then maybe it's just not worth it.
TV Show: Drawn Together
Captain Hero: Psst! That guard outfit makes you look fat.
Ryan the Rhino Guard: It does? [runs off crying]
Another Rhino Guard: Oh, great! Now I'll have to deal with that all night. Ryan, wait up!
Ryan the Rhino Guard: It does? [runs off crying]
Another Rhino Guard: Oh, great! Now I'll have to deal with that all night. Ryan, wait up!
TV Show: Drawn Together
Jew Son: Hey, after that, Jew Dad, can we play a little catch?
Jew Producer: Of course, Jew Son. Gosh, I love you. I don't know what I'd do if anything would happen to you. Oh, how emotionally invested I am in you staying safe and remaining alive, as would anyone watching us right now. [his cell phone rings] Oh, no.
Jew Wife: Don't you dare answer that! It's Shabbat!
Jew Producer: But it's work! It must be important if the boss is calling today.
Jew Wife: I don't care if it's Moses himself. Do NOT answer that!
Jew Producer: Of course, Jew Son. Gosh, I love you. I don't know what I'd do if anything would happen to you. Oh, how emotionally invested I am in you staying safe and remaining alive, as would anyone watching us right now. [his cell phone rings] Oh, no.
Jew Wife: Don't you dare answer that! It's Shabbat!
Jew Producer: But it's work! It must be important if the boss is calling today.
Jew Wife: I don't care if it's Moses himself. Do NOT answer that!
TV Show: Drawn Together
Clara: What the... [walks into the king, who is not her father at all] Who the fuck are you? [everyone gasps]
King: I am the king!
Clara: The king? You are not the king. My father is the king, which makes me the princess.
Real Princess: Father, I think this peasant has gone mad with the plague... [spinning around, during which time we get to see her vagina under her dress] for everyone knows I am the true princess of the land.
King: I am the king!
Clara: The king? You are not the king. My father is the king, which makes me the princess.
Real Princess: Father, I think this peasant has gone mad with the plague... [spinning around, during which time we get to see her vagina under her dress] for everyone knows I am the true princess of the land.
TV Show: Drawn Together
Xandir: [to a crying Clara] Oh, it's OK, Clara. So we're not who we think we are. So what, right?
Clara: So what? If I'm not a princess, then I'm just another beautiful virgin with real C-cups and a super-tight ass that continuously vibrates and tastes like wild berries. Who could ever love someone like that? [cries more]
King: Dungeon master, make sure the guillotine is not too far back on the stage. I want the people in the front row to have to wear rain ponchos.
Clara: Milord, perhaps you could see it in your heart to let me live here in your kingdom and give me the opportunity to be the real princess I always thought I was, for I can be just as good as the officially-sanctioned princesses in your kingdom. Allow me. [sings and attracts some animals, Disney princess-style]
Xandir: Yeah, Clara! She's doing it! It's working!
Clara: For fuck's sake, Xandir! I'm trying to impress the goddamn king! And I can't fucking sing if you keep flapping those dick-sucking lips of yours! [repeatedly slaps Xandir with a bird]
Clara: So what? If I'm not a princess, then I'm just another beautiful virgin with real C-cups and a super-tight ass that continuously vibrates and tastes like wild berries. Who could ever love someone like that? [cries more]
King: Dungeon master, make sure the guillotine is not too far back on the stage. I want the people in the front row to have to wear rain ponchos.
Clara: Milord, perhaps you could see it in your heart to let me live here in your kingdom and give me the opportunity to be the real princess I always thought I was, for I can be just as good as the officially-sanctioned princesses in your kingdom. Allow me. [sings and attracts some animals, Disney princess-style]
Xandir: Yeah, Clara! She's doing it! It's working!
Clara: For fuck's sake, Xandir! I'm trying to impress the goddamn king! And I can't fucking sing if you keep flapping those dick-sucking lips of yours! [repeatedly slaps Xandir with a bird]
TV Show: Drawn Together
Tara Strong - Princess Clara/Toot Braunstein
James Arnold Taylor - Wooldoor Sockbat/The Jew Producer
Cree Summer - Foxxy Love/Suck My Taint Girl (movie only)/Strawberry Sweetcake
Abbey DiGregorio - Ling-Ling
Jack Plotnick - Xandir P. Wifflebottom
Adam Carolla - Spanky Ham
Jess Harnell - Captain Leslie Hero
Seth MacFarlane - I.S.R.A.E.L. (movie only)
Vernon Wells - Network Head (movie only)
James Arnold Taylor - Wooldoor Sockbat/The Jew Producer
Cree Summer - Foxxy Love/Suck My Taint Girl (movie only)/Strawberry Sweetcake
Abbey DiGregorio - Ling-Ling
Jack Plotnick - Xandir P. Wifflebottom
Adam Carolla - Spanky Ham
Jess Harnell - Captain Leslie Hero
Seth MacFarlane - I.S.R.A.E.L. (movie only)
Vernon Wells - Network Head (movie only)
TV Show: Drawn Together