WKRP in Cincinnati Quotes
Andy: There are thousands of stations in this country with women on the air.
Les: As disk jockeys, yes. But this is news, Travis, news - important stuff.
Andy: What about Barbara Walters?
Les: I 'west' my case.
Les: As disk jockeys, yes. But this is news, Travis, news - important stuff.
Andy: What about Barbara Walters?
Les: I 'west' my case.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Les: Now about the format. Whenever possible I always try to lead with the hog futures, particularly in the morning.
Bailey: Why?
Les: Because, Bailey, that's what people are interested in.
Bailey: Yeah, but what if a really big story is breaking?
Les: Well, that's when you have to use your news judgment. There will always be exceptions. For instance, when President Richard Milhous Nixon resigned, I led the news with that story. Looking back, I think I made the right decision.
Bailey: Why?
Les: Because, Bailey, that's what people are interested in.
Bailey: Yeah, but what if a really big story is breaking?
Les: Well, that's when you have to use your news judgment. There will always be exceptions. For instance, when President Richard Milhous Nixon resigned, I led the news with that story. Looking back, I think I made the right decision.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Johnny: [about being alone on Christmas] Do you know how hard it is to find a 2 lb. turkey?
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Johnny: [after playing Christmas music] I don't get it either, babies, but somebody out there likes it. So we'll just keep shoveling through the seasonal syrup. Not too much left of this season of good cheer and bad music.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Sparky: So, Derek, how does your team look?
Derek Doogle: Uh, mostly Venezuelan.
Derek Doogle: Uh, mostly Venezuelan.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Johnny: Do you believe in a supreme being?
Bailey: Wow! Uh, I think so.
Johnny: What's he like?
Bailey: Well, first of all she's black—that was a joke. An old joke, but a good one.
Bailey: Wow! Uh, I think so.
Johnny: What's he like?
Bailey: Well, first of all she's black—that was a joke. An old joke, but a good one.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Johnny: Bigotry started a long time ago. Nobody knows where. I think the French started it.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Johnny: How can you do that? How can you put a dollar value on your sister's company? And, more importantly, how much?
Andy: Thirty bucks.
Johnny: What's wrong with your sister?
Andy: Thirty bucks.
Johnny: What's wrong with your sister?
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Johnny: Any signs of senility?
Herb Sr.: It's all around, Venus.
Venus: I'm Venus.
Herb Sr.: Then who's he?
Venus: That's Johnny.
Herb Sr.: The black guy?
Venus: No, I'm the black guy.
Herb Sr.: Oh, excuse me.
Herb Sr.: It's all around, Venus.
Venus: I'm Venus.
Herb Sr.: Then who's he?
Venus: That's Johnny.
Herb Sr.: The black guy?
Venus: No, I'm the black guy.
Herb Sr.: Oh, excuse me.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Herb Sr.: You know, my son speaks about you all the time.
Bailey: He does?
Herb Sr.: No, he doesn't, but he should. My son is a little bit of a jerk.
Bailey: He does?
Herb Sr.: No, he doesn't, but he should. My son is a little bit of a jerk.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Venus: [on Herb's suit] Somewhere there's a Volkswagen without seat covers.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Jennifer: Why Herb, this is a really fine French wine!
Herb: Is it? Well, I told the guy to give me the best he's got in the store without going over fourteen bucks.
Herb: Is it? Well, I told the guy to give me the best he's got in the store without going over fourteen bucks.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Andy: Damn, I like this cloak and dagger stuff! Carrying a Russian across Ohio in the dead of night, and you're telling me my life ain't workin' out?
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Les: If there's one thing this reporter knows about, it's two things: One, hogs, and two, Russians.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Jennifer: You're Les' fiancée?
Darlene: Mm hmm.
Jennifer: Uh huh. Does Les know about this?
Darlene: Mm hmm.
Jennifer: Uh huh. Does Les know about this?
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Les: [Mrs. Nedelman] doesn't like for me to have lady guests.
Darlene: It must be terrible to have such an awful landlady living right next door!
Les: Oh, she's not my landlady, she's my tenant. I own this duplex.
Darlene: Rather than put an old lady, or even a dog, out in the street, you just take it. What a man you are, Les Nessman.
Darlene: It must be terrible to have such an awful landlady living right next door!
Les: Oh, she's not my landlady, she's my tenant. I own this duplex.
Darlene: Rather than put an old lady, or even a dog, out in the street, you just take it. What a man you are, Les Nessman.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Andy: [to Johnny] We've got a playlist. You should play the list. We've gotta play some Top 40 hits, don't we? Why, sure we do. Yet you have yet to play a single hit off the playlist all week. Play the playlist. Play a part of the playlist! Play one song off the playlist! Play a part of one of the songs off the playlist! Well, it's so nice to see we've established a dialogue here. There you go, you want to talk about this, I'll be in my office playing with a loaded revolver.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Johnny: [after Andy's pressure to play a Top 40 song] Okay babies, we've got time for just one Top 40 Hit, so let's check out the Captain and Tenille. Uh oh! No more time. Maybe tomorrow!
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Venus: [on getting older] I took a look at my wardrobe, and I asked myself, "does a grown man dress like this?"
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Les: Why are we all here on this planet?
Jennifer: As opposed to where, Les?
Jennifer: As opposed to where, Les?
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Les: Travis, the very first day you came to this station you promised to get me a helicopter.
Andy: I know I did, Les, but that was a long time ago and I was lying.
Andy: I know I did, Les, but that was a long time ago and I was lying.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Les: Everybody around here thinks I'm crazy! Fortunately, you know better than that.
Jennifer: [silence]
Les: Fortunately, you know better than that.
Jennifer: [silence]
Les: Fortunately, you know better than that.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Herb: Unless someone comes out here right now and helps me with this piano, I'm never ever going to speak to any of you again for as long as I live!
[silence]
[silence]
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Les: [about Jennifer's house] My great aunt Eureka Nessman lived in a house very like this once, all alone. She had a little parakeet and she used to let it fly free throughout the house.
Jennifer: Really?
Les: Then she bought another parakeet, and another, and more and more until finally there were thousands of parakeets. And the mess they made was beyond belief. Aunt Eureka had gone insane of course, living all alone in a house very much like this one.
Jennifer: Really?
Les: Then she bought another parakeet, and another, and more and more until finally there were thousands of parakeets. And the mess they made was beyond belief. Aunt Eureka had gone insane of course, living all alone in a house very much like this one.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Lucille: We only allow the children to watch wholesome, family entertainment.
TV Hostess: Like what?
Lucille: Well, the Little House on the Prairie. Now that's a fine, wholesome show. It's about blind children out west, and every week they have a fire, or someone gets an incurable disease. We enjoy it very much.
TV Hostess: Like what?
Lucille: Well, the Little House on the Prairie. Now that's a fine, wholesome show. It's about blind children out west, and every week they have a fire, or someone gets an incurable disease. We enjoy it very much.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Johnny: In the first place, Herb's name isn't Tarlek, it's Nietzsche. He's directly related to the famous nihilist philosopher. See, he came to America to prove through the use of polyester that God is dead, and I think he's succeeded admirably, don't you?
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Guard in lobby: Where'd you get a jacket like that? I mean, do they sell them somewhere?
Herb: Of course, they sell them somewhere.
Guard in lobby: Where?
Herb: Yeah. I tell you, you tell somebody else, pretty soon the whole world is dressing like me.
Herb: Of course, they sell them somewhere.
Guard in lobby: Where?
Herb: Yeah. I tell you, you tell somebody else, pretty soon the whole world is dressing like me.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Les: And so, in summary, this German piggy went to the common market. This Chinese piggy stayed home. This Soviet piggy had turkey. Our American piggy had none. This is Les Nessman saying wee wee wee all the way home.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Nikki: I know what you're thinking, Herb. You're thinking God didn't make me this way. Well, God didn't make polyester either. You know what I'm saying, Herb?
Herb: I know what you're saying, I have no idea what it means.
Herb: I know what you're saying, I have no idea what it means.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
Jennifer: So there we are standing at my front door, and he says, "Jennifer, some women would feel obligated after flying to New Orleans on a private jet and a moonlight dinner on a Mississippi riverboat, but I prefer a challenge. Someone who's interested in me, and not my money."
Bailey: What'd you do?
Jennifer: Well, I wished him luck, kissed him on his bald spot and wheeled him to his car.
Bailey: What'd you do?
Jennifer: Well, I wished him luck, kissed him on his bald spot and wheeled him to his car.
TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati