WKRP in Cincinnati Quotes

[Arthur Carlson has just warned a religious figure to be careful picking who to boycott]
Dr. Bob Halyers: Well then, I'll have to do what is says in the good book, learn to love my enemy.
Arthur 'Big Guy' Carlson: You're gonna have to, because I don't think you can trust your friends.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
[at a record store hosting a WKRP remote broadcast]
Herb Tarlek: Del, goshdarnit I've got to go, but if you need anything, anything at all, I'll be in my car somewhere.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
[Johnny is lying to keep from being beaten up by a big thug named Dave]
Dr. Johnny Fever: I'm Andy Travis, glad to meet you, (pointing to the real Andy Travis) that's my brother Randy and that's old Venus of course.
Venus Flytrap: Of course.
Dr. Johnny Fever: [referring to Dave] We don't know who the mountainoid is.
Dave: Name's Dave.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
[Newscast from opening credits]
Reporter: And the senator, while insisting he was not intoxicated, could not explain his nudity.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
[repeated line]
Herb Tarlek: Okay fine.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
[repeated line]
Les Nessman: Oooo!

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati
[Venus is showing off his flashy wardrobe]
Venus Flytrap: I only came downtown to have one of my suits serviced.
Dr. Johnny Fever: I'll bet a suit like that stays in the shop most of the time.
Venus Flytrap: I got suits I can't get parts for.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Jennifer Marlowe: Mr. Craven I would like to ask you a question about the phone company.
Wayne Craven: Well that's what I'm here for, fire away.
Jennifer Marlowe: You know the phone company won't give you a specific time when they'll come to install your phone. You have to wait all day long. Like most people, I work and can't take the whole day off.
Wayne Craven: Uh-Hunh.
Jennifer Marlowe: So Saturday is the only day I'll be here. But because so many other people have the same problem, you can wait up to two, three weeks or more for service.
Wayne Craven: That's correct.
Jennifer Marlowe: Could you tell me why that is?
Wayne Craven: Of course, it's like that because we don't have any competition.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Venus Flytrap: [Fever runs into the booth and hides behind the coat rack] What are you doin', man! I'm on the air!
Dr. Johnny Fever: Herb Tarlek is selling life insurance!
Venus Flytrap: Oh, no! Close the blinds before he sees us!
Andy Travis: [Walks into the booth] What have I told you guys about goofing off when one of you is supposed to be on the air?
Dr. Johnny Fever: Herb Tarlek is selling life insurance!
Andy Travis: Oh, no! [slams the door and hides with Fever]

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Herb Tarlek: It's bad luck to take advice from a crazy person.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Dr. Johnny Fever: Do you have enough money to feed yourself?
Les Nessman: Yes.
Dr. Johnny Fever: I don't, can you loan me some money?
Les Nessman: No.
Dr. Johnny Fever: Can you loan me some food?

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Arthur 'Big Guy' Carlson: As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Les Nessman: [repeated sign-off line] This is Les Nessman saying so long, and may the good news be yours.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Les Nessman: [saying that Bailey shouldn't produce the show] This isn't the Ohio State School of Journalism, this is the big time.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Les Nessman: Last night at that house, did anything happen?
Jennifer Marlowe: I met a lady whose car I have to replace and I discovered we have a sex pervert in the neighborhood.
Les Nessman: No, I mean did anything unusual happen?

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Les Nessman: What is an executrix?
Herb Tarlek: Oh it has to do with whips, chains, and leather. That sort of thing.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Andy Travis: It's a good thing I had an extra pair of jeans in my office.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati

Bailey Quarters: Have you noticed all the men in Landersville are going bald? I wonder if there's a nuclear power plant in the area.

TV Show: WKRP in Cincinnati