Veronica Mars Quotes

Keith: guess who got an invite to the police bachelor auction?
Veronica: sarcasticly Please say Veronica Mars. Please say Veronia Mars.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Troy: Isn't this where we parked? Tell me that this isn't where we parked. Please, someone tell me that you can see my father's car and this heart attack I'm having now is for nothing.
Logan: I don't know. Maybe it's like Brigadoon. Come back in a hundred years and it'll be right back in this spot.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica Mars: [answering phone] Mars Investigations, Detective Mars speaking.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica Mars: According to the PHAT website, we should stay away from fur, obviously, down, leather.
Cindy 'Mac' Mackenzie: The one day I feel like wearing a leather miniskirt!
Veronica Mars: If it ever had a face or a parent, you can't wear it.
Cindy 'Mac' Mackenzie: So my mollusk shoes are cool?

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica Mars: I used to think I knew what tore our family apart. Now I'm sure I don't. But I promise this: I will find out what really happened, and I will bring this family back together again. I'm sorry, is that mushy? Well, you know what they say. Veronica Mars, she's a marshmallow.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica Mars: Remember that case a couple years ago where that woman was impersonating her boss? How did you obtain the ATM photos that proved it?
Keith Mars: I know a guy, a representative of the bank. He needs to request a court order and once the court order is issued, it only takes about an hour to get the photos.
Veronica Mars: So, it's a piece of cake.
Keith Mars: A monkey with a friend who's a bank representative can do it.
Veronica Mars: So, Bubbles. You feel like doing me a solid? Hm?

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Please read Veronica Mars/Format for notes on how to use and edit this article.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica: [voiceover] I'm never getting married. You want an absolute...well there it is. Veronica Mars: Spinster.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
[Mrs. Murphy catches Vernonica napping in her class.]
Mrs. Murphy: Congratulations, you're my volunteer. Pope. An Essay on Man. Epistle I.
Veronica: "Hope springs eternal in the human breast; Man never Is, but always to be blest: the soul, uneasy and confined from home, rests and expatiates in a life to come."
Mrs. Murphy: And what do you suppose Pope meant by that?
Veronica: Life's a bitch until you die.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica: And let's not forget Logan Echolls. Every school has an obligatory psychotic jackass. He's ours.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Eli "Weevil" Navarro: Sister. The only time I care what a woman has to say is when she's riding my big old hog. Even then, it's not so much words, just a bunch of "oohs" and "ahs" you know?
Veronica Mars: So it's big, huh?
Weevil: Legendary.
Veronica: Well , let's see it. I mean if it's as big as you say, I'll be your girlfriend. [bats eyes and gasps] We could go to prom together. What? What seems to be the problem? I'm on a schedule here vato.
Felix Toombs: Weevil, don't let blondie talk to you like that.
Veronica: Sounds like your buddy here wants to see it too.
Felix: Oh, hell, I'll show you mine!
Vice Principle Clemmons: Felix Toombs. What on God's green Earth is going on here? All right, gentleman, move along. [Weevil, Felix and others leave] Veronica, why does trouble follow you around? [Clemmons leaves]

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Lamb: You need to go see the wizard. Ask him for some guts.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica: Let's go.
Wallace: Hey, FloJo, slow your ass down.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Fire Chief: [about Veronica] Well, if it isn't Smokey the Barely Legal.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Wallace: That might play with the masses, but underneath that angry young woman shell, there's a slightly less angry young woman who's just dying to bake me something. You're a marshmallow, Veronica Mars. A twinkie!

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Logan: Hey, Veronica Mars. Do you know what your little joke cost me?
Veronica: Well, I'm pretty sure you won't be getting your bong back.
Logan: [smashes a headlight] Wrong answer. Would you care to guess again?
Veronica: Clearly your sense of humor.
Logan: [smashes other headlight] Nope. And you're usually so good at pop quizzes. No, the correct answer is: my car. That's right, my Daddy took my T-bird away. And you know what I won't be having? Fun, fun, fun.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Wallace: I suddenly feel like I'm in a scene from The Outsiders.
Veronica: Be cool, Sodapop.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica: You know what they say about Veronica Mars: she's a marshmallow.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Wallace: Another big Friday night. You got plans?
Veronica: I don't know. I might take Backup for a run or rent a movie, maybe.
Wallace: Hey, congratulations. You are officially Neptune High's most boring person.
Veronica: Did I mention the movie might be PG-13?
Wallace: Oh, jump back, wild child!
Veronica: What about you, Wallace? Your life still a non-stop Nelly video?
Wallace: Hey, at least I want my life to be a non-stop Nelly video.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica: I gotta run. The counselor wants to see me before class.
Keith: About what?
Veronica: Uh, my schedule and my attitude, not necessarily in that order. Her words.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Ms. Dent: Can I help you with something?
Veronica: Uh, yeah. The counselor stuck me in here. [Ms. Dent walks over to take informational papers from her] She says I'm disconnected and passionless.
Caitlin: Ms. Dent?
Ms. Dent: Caitlin?
Caitlin: I'm gonna go down to the gym to talk to people for the student poll.
Ms. Dent: Be back by the end of the period. And remember that we're a multicultural school with a diverse population of students from a wide range of socio-economic backgrounds.
Caitlin: Meaning?
Ms. Dent: Meaning don't just interview your friends.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica: I printed out the entire browser history from Logan Echolls's computer in his fourth period computer lab class.
Wallace: So is he guilty?
Veronica: Well, of wanting desperately to see pictures of Alyssa Milano naked, yes.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Troy: Flat?
Veronica: Just as God made me.
Troy: Are you always this persnickety?
Veronica: Sometimes I'm even persnicketier.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Veronica: [voiceover] They gave me a choice. I could stand by my dad, or stand by Duncan and my dead best friend's family. I chose Dad. It's a decision I live with every day. And you want to know the kicker? I don't even know what's true anymore. Maybe everyone else is right. Maybe Dad screwed up the investigation. Maybe I gave up my circle of friends - my life - over an error in Dad's judgment.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Troy: Well a wise man once said that a 'No' is like a 'Yes' except with different letters and arranged in a different order and spoken out loud but, you know, it disappears on the wind.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Troy: Guess what I'm doing this weekend.
Veronica: I'm guessing it involves autoeroticism.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Keith: Have you been playing nice with the other children?
Veronica: You know Dad, I'm old school, an eye for an eye.
Keith: I think that's actually Old Testament.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Wallace: Hi, sir. Wallace Fennel.
Veronica: [proudly] Wallace is a friend of mine. [Veronica performs a martial arts gesture with her hands.] Take that, high school guidance counselor.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Keith: So how did she rope you into this?
Wallace: She promised me all the answer keys to… Just promised to be my friend.
Keith: I'd have held out for a better offer.

TV Show: Veronica Mars
Wallace: You called your geometry teacher a jackass?
Veronica: That's totally taken out of context. Let me see it.

TV Show: Veronica Mars