The Oblongs Quotes

Chip: I've got a better one, how about the Lame-ass Treehouse Club for Babies?
Biff: Hah, hah I second that [Both high-five]
Helga: [in a flirty voice] I third it.
Chip: [about Helga] Hey, did you guys know there's a giant tree toad in here?
Helga: [to Chip] I love you! [She lunges herself at Chip, who moves out of the way, and she winds up kissing Milo instead, much to her horror] Ugh! I frenched Milo! Bleck!

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Milo: I have to go to the bathroom!
Chip: In that case, I'm going into a trace. [stares blankly for a moment, and then passes out]
Beth: [to Pickles] Mommy, what's a trance?
Pickles: Oh, it's just something your brothers do to give each other privacy.
Milo: [to Biff] I really have to go!
Biff: Number one or number two?
Milo: A little bit of both!
Biff: [to the others] Good night, folks. [also goes into a trance, and all three collapse on the floor]
Milo: [after being crushed beneath the weight of his brothers] This pressure's not helping....

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Milo: [to Chip after having his nipples squeezed] Hey, why are you squeezing my boobie?
Courtney: [to Chip] Are you trying to feel me up?
Chip: What?! No! I was feeling Milo up!
Courtney: You have no idea how wrong that sounds!
Chip: No, wait, I was trying to score with you!
Courtney: That's it, I'm leaving.

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Pickles: Bravo baby, bravo.
Bob: Thank you dearest, we aim to please or as the French say "Aah Uuuga!
Pickles: Eighteen years of marriage and we've never missed a night.
Bob: Or morning haha. Goodnight my love.
[Alarm goes off]
Pickles: Rise and shine me!

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Bob: James, you dog. So whose the lucky gal?
James: I don't know she hasn't been delivered yet.
Bob: Oh James, you can't marry a baby.
James: No she's a mail-order bride silly. I bought her on Ebay, I'm giving her this tomorrow. It's one of those cloudy yellowy diamonds that women love.
Bob: James I'm very happy for you. I only hope your marriage is as wonderful as mine and Pickles.
James: Thanks Bob. Hey you comin' to my bachlor party night right? The whole gang will be there!
Bob: What gang?
James: The one I bought on Ebay. Steve99@xcom, Packerfan@tetnet.
Bob: Sounds like a super giant gasser. Hey I have some funny napkins I can bring.

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Bob: [Gasps] Good lord that woman has no blouse on. '[Gasps] My god she's making it worse.
James: Bob, this is a strip joint.
Bob: A what? I thought it was a colonial theme steak house.
Announcer: Hear ye, hear ye. Let's give it up for a great patriot Lady Amber from the county of Cleavage as she declares independence from her knickers.

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Bob: Ah, I beseech my lady. My fair wife wouldn't approve. Ah careful there, my family jewels are on the dance floor. Ah miss, your clogs are getting awfully close to my...AHHHH!!!!

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Doctor: Oof, that's nasty. Well, no sex for a couple of weeks.
Bob: A couple of weeks! But my wife and I have never missed a night.
Doctor: Then what the hell were you doing in a strip joint you dirty pig!
Bob: It's really none of know your bedside manner could use a little work.
Doctor: Sorry.
[Doctor takes a picture of Bob's stuff]
Doctor: This ought to gross them out on the internet.

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Pickles: The captain of the SS Woman is on the bridge. [blowing horn sound] All hands on me!

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Pickles: Kids, I'm going to ask you a question and I want you to be brutally honest. Is mommy still sexy?
Chip: Gross.
Biff: Aren't you like thirty or something.?
Pickles: Thanks.
Beth: I think your beautiful mommy.
Pickles: Awww, baby.
Beth: You have a pretty mustache.

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Chip: Dude, you look thrashed.
Milo: I didn't get any shut eye. Except for this one in which doesn't count cause there's something wrong with me.

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Pickles: My Bob isn't attracted to me anymore Anita.
Anita: Let me get you a drink.
Pickles: I'm too depressed to drink. Just give me a beer and a shot.
Anita: I'm sure it's nothing to worry about Bobs probably just having an affair.
Pickles: What?!
Anita: Have you noticed any of the tell tale signs?
Pickles: Like what?
Anita: Oh, like.. he's irrepressibly chipper?
Pickles: He sure is.
Anita: Stingy with the hugs?
Pickles: You know I always have to hug him.
Anita: Is there a bounce in his step?
Pickles: Oh, my god he has been bouncing!
Anita: Take it from me, he's chasing strange.
Pickles: Well, no one's stealing the love of my life! I'm going to follow him! [She pauses] What was I going to do?

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Pickles: How dare you steal my husband!
Nun 1: Me? I'm married to the Lord.
Nun 2: Hey! I'm married to the Lord.
Nun 1: Oh, no you're not!
Guy: Nun Pile!

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Pickles: Who is she? I know you're having an affair Bob. That's why you won't make love to me.
Bob: An affair? That's crazy.
Pickles: Don't screw with me Bob, I bit off a nun's ear. Now tell me the truth.
Bob: Ok! I'll tell you! I went to James' bachlor party and a stripper stepped on...your buddy!! I'm a filthy pig!
Pickles: Awww, Bob, I don't care about that.
Bob: But.. I'm a dirty birdy.
Pickles: Yeah but you're my dirty birdy. Now let's never use that phrase again.
Bob: Uh Pickles, we still can't have relations for a while.
Pickles: Oh right. Well, we can do without sex. After all we have a very rich relationship.
Bob: That we do, sugar lumps.
Pickles: I mean two weeks isn't that long.
Bob: Nah.
[Short pause]
Pickles: Gimmie sex! Gimmie sex!
Bob: Ahh! No means no! No means no!

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Teacher: Ok kids, we're going to be working with some volatile chemicals today, except for you Milo since the school board has rated you a class four maniac.
Milo: I was just gonna broil a nice cup of tea. You know, I don't sleep.

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[Tea kettle goes off]
Teacher: Kids, Milo's made a bomb!
[Everyone ducks for cover]
Milo: There, there now, it's just my kettle. The old girl does jabber up a storm. Ahh.. jasmine.
Susie: He's getting awfully purty. He's got to get some sleep.
Helge: Just not before the crumpets are ready.
Milo: Now, now let 'em cool, you wee buggers.

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Pickles: Anita do you have a brother?
Anita: Uhh... Yeah, sure, why not?

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Pickles: Bob what's happening to us? We used to have so much fun together.
Bob: We're eating soup with garlic croutons. What do you want woman?
Pickles: Well, let's go out on the town. We can call another couple and double date.
Bob: The only couple I know are James and his fiancee. I don't how much fun she'll be,though. She's dead..and Canadian.

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James: Maybe you could give me some marriage advice?
Bob: Sure. Never let a stripper clog dance near your dingle.
James: Are there two g's in 'dingle'?

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Biff: Dude, eating an entire turkey in bed was a great idea.
Chip: Yeah, but won't it make us sleepy?
Biff: Nah, not unless we hear some white noise.
[Hear water coming into their room and they fall asleep]

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Pickles: What's all that racket?
Bob: The kids are drowning baby.

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Helga: (as other children are making a sand statue around her) I'm going through puberty. Make with the sea weed!

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Bob: I may not have arms and legs, but I have the one part of a man that truely matters, and it's huge.
Dusty: I'd like to see that.
Male lifeguard: Me too.

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