iCarly Quotes

Carly: No one wants to kill a live chicken and then barbecue it!
Sam: You don't know everything.

TV Show: iCarly
Freddie: iCarly is not responsible for damage caused to your feet, toes or the central nervous system.

TV Show: iCarly
Gibby: They really hit it off.
Spencer: GIBBY!!!

TV Show: iCarly
Spencer: Did you guys save me a meatball?
Freddie: Sure did. Heads up! (putts it at Spencer with a golf club, and he catches it)
Spencer: Thanks. (takes a bite of it and walks out)

TV Show: iCarly
Carly: (referring to the old lady who stomped her) She stomped me with her boney old foot!
Freddie: You want me to rub it? (she looks at him displeased) ...You rub it.

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Guppy: (to Gibby after he slams himself into a tree) Happy birthday!
Gibby: What is that, your catchphrase?

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Guppy: Go, Gibby!
Gibby: YOU SAW NOTHING! (gets in the dual-bike and rides off)

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Carly: Give me the mic. (takes the mic)
Sam: Go get em', kid.
Carly: We're never going back to Wisconsin.

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Spencer: And who agrees that my butt is NOT FLAT????? (no one says anything; he drops the microphone and walks away)

TV Show: iCarly
Carly: [referring to Spencer] He drinks milk in the shower.
Spencer: All naked and...wet!

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Sam: Can you grab me an extra Fat-Shake on your way out?

TV Show: iCarly
Sam: Yes, it's true. Carly and Freddie are deeply in love.

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Freddie: I'll fire Ashley as soon as you fire Cort.
Carly: But Cort's too pretty to fire.

TV Show: iCarly
[Sam runs into Spencer and Carly's apartment]
Sam: Hey! Can I come in?! Freddie get off that computer! Have you guys seen this?! YOU GOTTA SEE THIS!!!
Freddie: No wait, just give me about 20- GOING DOWN!!!
[Sam pushes Freddie off his chair and onto the floor]
Freddie: Aw man! It was rendering!
Carly: [to Sam] What is up?
Sam: Nevel!
Spencer: Pappermen?
Sam: [sarcastically] No, Nevel Vanhutersmusen.
Spencer: The pianist?!
Freddie: There's only one Nevel.
Carly: And he's not a pianist.

TV Show: iCarly
[Nevel is in a super market where the pickles are displayed]
Nevel: Dill pickles, kosher pickles, sweet pick- AHA! Bread and butter pickles, last jar.
[Nevel is about to walk away when a little girl accidentally bumps into him with a shopping cart, causing Nevel to drop the jar and it breaks]
Nevel: No! NOOOO!
Little Girl: I'm sorry.
Nevel: [angry] Sorry? You're SORRY?! THAT WAS THE LAST DANG JAR OF BREAD AND BUTTER PICKLES IN THIS STORE!! Where's your stupid mother?! Where is she?!
[Nevel takes a giant lollipop out of the little girl's shopping cart]
Nevel: [calmly] Were you gonna buy this lollipop? [throws the lollipop down and breaks it] Well now it's broken!!
[The little girl starts crying]
Nevel: Doesn't feel to good does it?! Oh HERE we go! Sure! Cry it up! WELL I'M CRYING ON THE INSIDE BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE ANY DANG BREAD AND BUTTER PICKLES! JERK!

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[At the karma party]
Sam: To Nevel's misery!

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Carly: You've been acting different.
Sam: No I haven't.
Carly: Oh come on. Lately whenever Brad and Freddie want to do something, all of a sudden you want to tag along. Brad's so nice. He's polite, he's smart, he's got no warrants. Think of all the fudge-y good times you'll have together! Don't you want a nice boyfriend? Go for it. Make a move. I just want you to be happy.
Sam: Then bake me a pie. [leaves]
Gibby: I love pie.
Carly: Gibby!

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Gibby: [leaving] Sure. Always make Gibby clean the vomit out of the sensory stimulus chamber!

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Freddie: Look, I know it's scary for you to put your feelings out there, 'cuz you never know if the person you like is gunna like you back. Everyone feels that way. But you never know what might happen if you don't-
Sam: [kisses Freddie]
Freddie: [after the kiss] I...
Sam: S-sorry.
Freddie: ...It's cool.

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Carly: Sam doesn't usually give complements.
Freddie: Usually they're insults...followed by beatings.

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Carly: You've seen the animal channel!
Freddie: [looks confused]
Carly: The...the horses.
Freddie: [raises eyebrows]
Carly: When they want two horses to...y'know... "DATE"...
Freddie: [nods head]
Carly: ...they put 'em in the same barn together...then they, like, turn the barn lights down...
Freddie: [smiles, raises eyebrows, and nods]
Carly: Oh, you know what I'm talking about, why are you making me say it!?
Freddie: [laughs] Okay, okay. So we get Sam and Brad. Take 'em to a barn...
Carly: Stop joking, this is serious!

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Sam: So...where did you learn to make fudge?
Brad: Oh, my great-grandma taught me.
Sam: She was a good woman, Brad.
Brad: She's still alive...
Sam: Even better.

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Spencer's Ex-girlfriend: You shattered my heart! And my leg!

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Rex: The geek rejected by the freak. That's ironic.

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Carly: Boomba.

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Sam: The Nile's not just a river in Utah.
Carly: Egypt!

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Cat: Last night my brother bit my foot.
Lane: Well, I don't need to know everything.
Cat: Soup.

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Robbie: He's really mad.
Rex: But he's got really beautiful skin.

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Spencer: Can Gibby come? He's got the hands of a goddess.

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Freddie: He deserves it!
Carly: I know but you're nerdy. Steven would beat you silly.

TV Show: iCarly