Dead Like Me Quotes
Ray Summers: Okay George, five reasons why men are scum and women let us get away with it. 1. We all only want one thing. No exceptions. 2. We fall in love before we have that thing, and then fall back out once we've had it, whereas women conversly fall in love afterwards. 3. We will lie, cheat, steal or murder to get that one thing. Why am I sugarcoating this? You're a big girl. In order to fuck you. 4. We freely admit the numbers 1 through 3 and women don't care, and the number 5 reason why men are scum and women let us get away with it: You can't live without us.
George: (Raising her shot glass to toast him) Here's to your bullshit, Ray. (Throws three more darts and gets a bullseye on the last one) Fucking men.
George: (Raising her shot glass to toast him) Here's to your bullshit, Ray. (Throws three more darts and gets a bullseye on the last one) Fucking men.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
George: [voiceover] They say coming clean is good for the soul, that it puts things in perspective. You can get a sense of your place in the order of things...a sense of who you really are and what's important. This is my perspective. I am a grim reaper. I take souls. I do not go to prom. I do not live happily ever after. This is who I am. Anyone got a problem with that?
TV Show: Dead Like Me
Mason: And now Mason will show little Georgie the finer art of stress relief through petty vandalism. Don't get me wrong. We will egg Trip's fucking mansion, but first...[Holds out a pen]
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[Reggie leaves her dog J.D. in Joy's care when her Goth friend "Raven" finds him too "preppy".]
Joy: [to J.D.] Oh, don't you worry. She needs a friend who's human. Or something close.
Joy: [to J.D.] Oh, don't you worry. She needs a friend who's human. Or something close.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[Flashback to elementary-school-age George reading A Tale of Two Cities instead of going to her friend's birthday party.]
Joy: We bought her a present!
Young George: What did you get her?
Joy: We got her a flannel nightgown. With pretty little flowers on it!
Young George: Mom. You're gonna get me killed.
Joy: Georgia, don't be silly. We're going.
Young George: Not.
Joy: You are so!
Young George: So not.
Joy: Why do you have to be so obstinate?
Young George: Obstinate. O-B-S-T-I-N-A-T-E. Stubborn.
Joy: Georgia Lass, you cannot spend your entire life with your nose stuck in a book!
Young George: Try me.
Joy: We bought her a present!
Young George: What did you get her?
Joy: We got her a flannel nightgown. With pretty little flowers on it!
Young George: Mom. You're gonna get me killed.
Joy: Georgia, don't be silly. We're going.
Young George: Not.
Joy: You are so!
Young George: So not.
Joy: Why do you have to be so obstinate?
Young George: Obstinate. O-B-S-T-I-N-A-T-E. Stubborn.
Joy: Georgia Lass, you cannot spend your entire life with your nose stuck in a book!
Young George: Try me.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[At a spelling bee, emcee G. McFadden's soul finds itself sitting beside George and Mason.]
McFadden: What just happened?
Mason: Oh, I'm afraid you are D-E-D…
McFadden: No, that's D-E-A-D.
Mason: I was joking!
McFadden: What just happened?
Mason: Oh, I'm afraid you are D-E-D…
McFadden: No, that's D-E-A-D.
Mason: I was joking!
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[At the restaurant, Mason and George return from the bee.]
Rube: Hey! How'd it go?
Mason: G-R-E-A-T.
George: It was a spelling bee.
Rube: [to Mason] Seriously, how'd it go?
Mason: F-A-N-T-A-S-T-I-C.
Rube: How do I get it to stop?
Mason: Well, go on, Georgie, tell him.
George: Well, as far as senseless, brutal deaths go, I say it went beautifully.
Mason: Yeah! So maybe a little simple "thank you" is in order, instead of your constant irritation, Ruby. Maybe a little bit of G-R-A-T… uh… t… i-i-tude, tude.
[Rube hands out Post-its.]
Rube: For you, and you.
Mason: Where's Roxy?
Rube: She has got a personal day.
Mason: Well, why don't I have a personal day?
Rube: Because you're an F-U-C-K-U-P.
Mason: "Fuck up" has two words.
George: Actually, "fuck-up" is a hyphenate.
[They all look at her.]
George: Well, it is!
Rube: Hey! How'd it go?
Mason: G-R-E-A-T.
George: It was a spelling bee.
Rube: [to Mason] Seriously, how'd it go?
Mason: F-A-N-T-A-S-T-I-C.
Rube: How do I get it to stop?
Mason: Well, go on, Georgie, tell him.
George: Well, as far as senseless, brutal deaths go, I say it went beautifully.
Mason: Yeah! So maybe a little simple "thank you" is in order, instead of your constant irritation, Ruby. Maybe a little bit of G-R-A-T… uh… t… i-i-tude, tude.
[Rube hands out Post-its.]
Rube: For you, and you.
Mason: Where's Roxy?
Rube: She has got a personal day.
Mason: Well, why don't I have a personal day?
Rube: Because you're an F-U-C-K-U-P.
Mason: "Fuck up" has two words.
George: Actually, "fuck-up" is a hyphenate.
[They all look at her.]
George: Well, it is!
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[Ray introduces himself to Rube at Der Waffle Haus and shakes his hand.]
Ray: That's quite a death grip you got there, Rube.
Ray: That's quite a death grip you got there, Rube.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[George tries to find a way to communicate to memory-challenged Nina that she has died.]
George: Do you want to hear a story, Nina?
Nina: Oh, I love stories.
George: Well, once there was a girl named George. She was 18 years old. And she didn't have a husband William, she didn't have have a daughter named Beth, but she had a mom, a father, and a sister. And, one day, she went outside — it was a sunny day, a few clouds, but an ordinary day — and she went out to get some lunch, and this man… he stopped me. And he talked to me. And he knew my last name. I told him to leave me alone, but… then something from the sky fell. And I didn't feel anything. I couldn't remember anything… at first. But then I did. I realized… I died.
[George reaches over to Nina's memory Post-it pad.]
George: I… died.
[She writes on the pad.]
George: I'm dead.
George: Do you want to hear a story, Nina?
Nina: Oh, I love stories.
George: Well, once there was a girl named George. She was 18 years old. And she didn't have a husband William, she didn't have have a daughter named Beth, but she had a mom, a father, and a sister. And, one day, she went outside — it was a sunny day, a few clouds, but an ordinary day — and she went out to get some lunch, and this man… he stopped me. And he talked to me. And he knew my last name. I told him to leave me alone, but… then something from the sky fell. And I didn't feel anything. I couldn't remember anything… at first. But then I did. I realized… I died.
[George reaches over to Nina's memory Post-it pad.]
George: I… died.
[She writes on the pad.]
George: I'm dead.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[Mason buries Ray's corpse as Daisy watches him through the window crying.]
George: [voiceover] There are things inside you that no one wants to face. Things that you keep secret, even from yourself. But secrets are funny. The things you try to hide always turn out to be the things you can't forget
George: [voiceover] There are things inside you that no one wants to face. Things that you keep secret, even from yourself. But secrets are funny. The things you try to hide always turn out to be the things you can't forget
TV Show: Dead Like Me
George: Did anyone here ever serve in the military?
Rube: No, nobody here did.
Roxy: I think Daisy serviced the army.
[George laughs.]
Mason: I don't care for that kind of joke.
Roxy: You are that kind of joke.
Rube: No, nobody here did.
Roxy: I think Daisy serviced the army.
[George laughs.]
Mason: I don't care for that kind of joke.
Roxy: You are that kind of joke.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
Mason: You know, this morning, when you said you spent your last day on Earth, your very, very last day on Earth, stapling?
George: Filing.
Mason: My God, that's even worse. You said you regretted it, didn't you?
George: Yeah of course. Who gives a shit?
Mason: My God, I give a shit. Rube tells us to be on the periphery. To keep away from...things. To keep our distance from...life. Our family...
George: Yeah?
Mason: God, it is nonsense. You get close, Georgie, you get close to everybody that ever meant anything to you.
George: Have you been drinking?
Mason: Of course I've bloody been drinking. And it's last call. And you gotta...you gotta drink up while you still can.
George: Filing.
Mason: My God, that's even worse. You said you regretted it, didn't you?
George: Yeah of course. Who gives a shit?
Mason: My God, I give a shit. Rube tells us to be on the periphery. To keep away from...things. To keep our distance from...life. Our family...
George: Yeah?
Mason: God, it is nonsense. You get close, Georgie, you get close to everybody that ever meant anything to you.
George: Have you been drinking?
Mason: Of course I've bloody been drinking. And it's last call. And you gotta...you gotta drink up while you still can.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
Daisy: [Rejecting Mason's ring] I won't fall in love, I won't get married, I won't grow old with someone, not with you or anyone.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
Kiffany: I know you didn't just steal that money from me.
Mason: I was keepin' it safe for you. I wanted you to get— get it.
Kiffany: You're out.
Mason: Out?
Kiffany: That's right. Out of my house.
Mason: This is Der Waffle Haus.
Kiffany: And you're der outer hier.
Mason: I was keepin' it safe for you. I wanted you to get— get it.
Kiffany: You're out.
Mason: Out?
Kiffany: That's right. Out of my house.
Mason: This is Der Waffle Haus.
Kiffany: And you're der outer hier.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
George: [voiceover] We think we can't do something… [chanting] we think we can't, we think we can't, we think we can't… but we can.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
George: [voiceover] I guess there's always something out there to hide from, something out there you just can't face. Three Mississippi. Four Mississippi. So you'll hide for as long as you can, but that's not easy either, all that hiding... Five Mississippi. In the end, what you were so afraid of turns out not to be so scary after all. Six Mississippi, seven. Because you have to know that if you're hiding, more often than not, your fears will come looking for you.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[George stops by her tombstone, where her sleeping mother and sister have camped out for El Día de los Muertos (The Day of the Dead).]
George: [voiceover] I'm not supposed to be here… but I am. I don't know if I'm supposed to watch over them… or just haunt them.
[She leaves some candy and tucks their blanket around them. She walks off, then turns back to see Reggie looking her way.]
George: [voiceover] Either way, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't having fun.
[She smiles and resumes her departure.]
George: [voiceover] I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to be here. Walking through a graveyard, the day after Halloween… on a quiet and beautiful November morning… It's not so bad, being dead like me.
George: [voiceover] I'm not supposed to be here… but I am. I don't know if I'm supposed to watch over them… or just haunt them.
[She leaves some candy and tucks their blanket around them. She walks off, then turns back to see Reggie looking her way.]
George: [voiceover] Either way, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't having fun.
[She smiles and resumes her departure.]
George: [voiceover] I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to be here. Walking through a graveyard, the day after Halloween… on a quiet and beautiful November morning… It's not so bad, being dead like me.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[after Rube asks Daisy to take two post its]
Daisy Adair: NO! And no means no! Powerful isn't it? I learned it at a PSA about date rape!
Daisy Adair: NO! And no means no! Powerful isn't it? I learned it at a PSA about date rape!
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[George is in a good mood one morning and Roxie doesn't like it]
Roxy: How about a hot cup of shut the fuck up?
Roxy: How about a hot cup of shut the fuck up?
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[George is thinking to herself about the new guy she has just met at work as she walks around the office]
George: I cannot go out with this Brennan guy, it would never work out. You're a Taurus, he's a Gemini. He's Lutheran, and you're dead. You have to weasel your way out of this, you have to tell him... no. [sees Fran, flirting with Brennan and playing with his hair]
George: Oh my god, some slut is stealing my boyfriend!
George: I cannot go out with this Brennan guy, it would never work out. You're a Taurus, he's a Gemini. He's Lutheran, and you're dead. You have to weasel your way out of this, you have to tell him... no. [sees Fran, flirting with Brennan and playing with his hair]
George: Oh my god, some slut is stealing my boyfriend!
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[Penny died on the Titanic]
George: How'd you die?
Penny: Boating accident.
George: Sailing? Water-skiing? Fall out of a dingy?
Penny: Bigger.
George: How'd you die?
Penny: Boating accident.
George: Sailing? Water-skiing? Fall out of a dingy?
Penny: Bigger.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[Rube lights his pipe in the Happy Time office]
George: You can't smoke in here.
Rube: Ah, fuck that bullshit, they can blow me.
George: You can't smoke in here.
Rube: Ah, fuck that bullshit, they can blow me.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
[talking to two girls]
Mason: Do any of you girls work for UPS? 'Cause I couldn't help but notice you were checking out my package.
Mason: Do any of you girls work for UPS? 'Cause I couldn't help but notice you were checking out my package.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
Betty: [taking a quiz] Do you consider yourself exceptionally reasonable or exceptionally kind?
Mason: Exceptionally kind. [Betty looks at him questioningly]
Mason: Well, I'm not particularly reasonable.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
Rube: [to a hurried woman who sees an acquaintance in line at the post office and moves in line next to her] I have a question for you... is everyone in this line an asshole?
Woman in Post Office: Excuse me?
Rube: Is everyone you just cut in front of an asshole?
Woman in Post Office: No.
Rube: So it's just you then?
Woman in Post Office: I have children in the car.
Rube: I have a cake in the oven. [pointing]
Rube: He's got three minutes left on the meter. And she's got a lunch meeting. We all have a finite amount of time. Now get in the back of the line. And don't use your children like that - it's shameful.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
Rube: [to George] You're a constipator, Peanut. You disturb my shit, and that's annoying.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
Rube: [trying to get the reapers to work on their self-exams] Hey-there's no hob-knobbing. This is not a debutante party.
TV Show: Dead Like Me
Rube: The thing is what, Mason?
Mason: You know that thing, ok, you're good at that thing, that, you can, you're better at, um, just, you know, you know, talking.
Rube: Well said.
TV Show: Dead Like Me