Criminal Minds Quotes
Hotchner: Anthony Brandt wrote, "Other things may change us, but we start and end with family."
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Jessica: You’re holding him like a cantaloupe.
Hotchner: Why? You think you can do better? Here you go, smartypants.
[Baby quiets down in her arms]
Hotchner: Fine. Let’s see you profile a disorganized psychopath.
Hotchner: Why? You think you can do better? Here you go, smartypants.
[Baby quiets down in her arms]
Hotchner: Fine. Let’s see you profile a disorganized psychopath.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Haley: Go, it’s all right. I’m not mad. [walks away]
Hotchner: You heard her. She said it was all right.
Jessica: You’re one hell of a profiler.
Hotchner: You heard her. She said it was all right.
Jessica: You’re one hell of a profiler.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Morgan: Nothing like jet sleep, right?
Elle: Yeah, kind of like a night of drinking without the drinking.
Elle: Yeah, kind of like a night of drinking without the drinking.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
[Garcia rattles off some bad Spanish]
Morgan: Easy there, Garcia. I think you just offended somebody’s mother.
Garcia: Shut up you. I took French. What can I say?
Morgan: Penelope, your last name is Garcia.
Garcia: Yeah, I know. It’s my stepfather’s name. Do you want my genius or not?
Morgan: Easy there, Garcia. I think you just offended somebody’s mother.
Garcia: Shut up you. I took French. What can I say?
Morgan: Penelope, your last name is Garcia.
Garcia: Yeah, I know. It’s my stepfather’s name. Do you want my genius or not?
TV Show: Criminal Minds
JJ: At least you get to spend your birthday weekend in Mexico.
Hotchner: Yeah, what's 'doghouse' in Spanish?
Reid: La ca-sa del pair-o
Elle: La casita del perro.
Reid: That's what I said
Elle: Face it chico, you are only a genius in English
Hotchner: Yeah, what's 'doghouse' in Spanish?
Reid: La ca-sa del pair-o
Elle: La casita del perro.
Reid: That's what I said
Elle: Face it chico, you are only a genius in English
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Gideon: In my experience, evil is not a cultural phenomenon - it's a human one.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Hotchner: Mexican proverb: “The house does not rest upon the ground, but upon a woman.”
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Gideon: The French philosopher Voltaire wrote, "There are some that only employ words for the purpose of disguising their thoughts."
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Morgan: Why are you acting so weird?
Elle: We're sitting with a guy who knows that there are 800 kernels of corn on the average cob...
Reid: ...Arranged in 16 separate rows.
Elle: And you're calling me weird?
Elle: We're sitting with a guy who knows that there are 800 kernels of corn on the average cob...
Reid: ...Arranged in 16 separate rows.
Elle: And you're calling me weird?
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Gideon: [after finding Gregory's fake IDs] Look at all these driver's licenses, he could start his own DMV.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
[Elle's phone rings]
Morgan: Aww, that must be the boyfriend.
Elle: Yes, it is. [answers phone] Hey, Gideon.
Morgan: Aww, that must be the boyfriend.
Elle: Yes, it is. [answers phone] Hey, Gideon.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Elle: You really don't know someone till you take a road trip with them.
Morgan: What are you trying to say?
Elle: Look at this car, man. There's empty soda cans and fast food wrappers everywhere. You're a slob. You know, back at Quantico your desk was all neat, but I bet if you looked in those drawers you'd find a mess.
Morgan: Okay, we have been on the road way too long.
Morgan: What are you trying to say?
Elle: Look at this car, man. There's empty soda cans and fast food wrappers everywhere. You're a slob. You know, back at Quantico your desk was all neat, but I bet if you looked in those drawers you'd find a mess.
Morgan: Okay, we have been on the road way too long.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Doug Gregory: Are you telling me that young boys aren’t curious?
Gideon: Sure, they’re curious, but not all peek into windows.
Gideon: Sure, they’re curious, but not all peek into windows.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Reid: How old was he when this happened?
Doug Gregory: Ten.
Reid: Were they close?
Doug Gregory: She was his mother!
Doug Gregory: Ten.
Reid: Were they close?
Doug Gregory: She was his mother!
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Hotchner[on the phone]: Hotchner.
Garcia: Who's the answer to all your dreams?
Hotchner: I'm gonna put you on speaker.
Garcia: Oh, you completely suck!
Garcia: Who's the answer to all your dreams?
Hotchner: I'm gonna put you on speaker.
Garcia: Oh, you completely suck!
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Garcia: Aaron, do you have any idea how many people drown every day?
Hotchner: Well, yeah. They’re more in the summer for obvious reasons, but I think it averages to about 6500 a year, which is... 17 a day?
Garcia: Is this Reid?
Hotchner: Why, are you impressed?
Garcia: I am slick, I am! You've been doing your research, haven't you?
Hotchner: Well, yeah. They’re more in the summer for obvious reasons, but I think it averages to about 6500 a year, which is... 17 a day?
Garcia: Is this Reid?
Hotchner: Why, are you impressed?
Garcia: I am slick, I am! You've been doing your research, haven't you?
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Gideon: The author François de la Rochefoucauld wrote, "We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves."
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Gideon: Albert Einstein said, "Whoever undertakes to set himself up as judge in the field of truth and knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods."
TV Show: Criminal Minds
JJ: What do you suppose this is about?
Reid: Call me cynical, but considering it's 2 a.m., I doubt it's good news.
JJ: You are a genius.
Reid: Call me cynical, but considering it's 2 a.m., I doubt it's good news.
JJ: You are a genius.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Elle: [to Gideon] You said you would send a postcard from a beach. You lied.
Reid: Yeah. You hate the beach.
Reid: Yeah. You hate the beach.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Gideon: Writer Elbert Hubbard said, "No man needs a vacation so much as the man who has just had one."
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Morgan: [about Reid] He look OK to you?
Elle: He looks about the way I would if I was gonna spend two weeks with my family.
Elle: He looks about the way I would if I was gonna spend two weeks with my family.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
JJ: [about the incredible Sir Kneighf] Please don’t tell me you have a crush on a fictional character.
Garcia: He’s not fictional. He’s the online alter-ego of a real person.
JJ: Hmmm, you don’t even know anything about him, even if it is…him.
Garcia: Look, we meet online at specified times that he is never late to. We spend hours adventuring and chatting during which time I have his undivided attention and he lavishes me with flattery. When was the last time you had a date go that well?
JJ: See if he’s got a fictional brother. Uncle, grandfather...
Garcia: He’s not fictional. He’s the online alter-ego of a real person.
JJ: Hmmm, you don’t even know anything about him, even if it is…him.
Garcia: Look, we meet online at specified times that he is never late to. We spend hours adventuring and chatting during which time I have his undivided attention and he lavishes me with flattery. When was the last time you had a date go that well?
JJ: See if he’s got a fictional brother. Uncle, grandfather...
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Morgan: Well, you all right there, Greenaway?
Elle: Go away.
Morgan: See you tomorrow?
Elle: Afternoon.
Guy: Afternoon?
Elle: Don't speak.
Elle: Go away.
Morgan: See you tomorrow?
Elle: Afternoon.
Guy: Afternoon?
Elle: Don't speak.
TV Show: Criminal Minds
Elle: [after Reid explains the medieval significance of the word "none"] Reid, do not ever go away again!
TV Show: Criminal Minds