My Hero Quotes

George: I rescued the comet, blew the hostages into the fire, and threw up.

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Janet: Exactly.

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George: At least I put out the fire.

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[In the shop]

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Arnie: Quiet, ain't it?

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Tyler: Yeah!

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Arnie: I mean, why isn't this store gettin' more business? It's got a prime spot in the high street, it's well stocked... I just don’t understand!

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[The door opens, and a woman comes in]

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Arnie and Tyler: We're closed!

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[She exits again]

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Arnie: Hey, did you hear that Piers is getting married? What an idiot!

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Tyler: What have you got against marriage, O, former king of the cosmos? You've done it enough times!

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Arnie: Exactly! It's hard work! "Love, honour and obey!" Talk about multi-tasking!

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[Arnie shared a piece of cake with Janet, a great offence to Ultronians which makes George literally turn green with jealousy. Tyler enters and pretends not to notice.]

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Janet: It's alright, Tyler. I can see it too.

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Tyler: God, that's a relief! Last time I saw something like that, they increased my medication!

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[Piers is getting married, little does he know he’s being used by his 'fiancée' Carol to get her a big TV job]

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Carol: Fantastic news! "Hey There!" Magazine say they'll print our wedding photos! And, if we get a bottle of Wash & Go into every shot, they'll split the profit!

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Piers: Fab! So, we've got Pot Noodle doing the catering, booze courtesy of Heineken, and the cake's being made by Utterly Butterly!

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Mrs. Raven: (Sarcastically) Oh, how romantic! So, will it be a white wedding?

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Piers: Certainly not! It'll be Orange... unless I can do a deal with Vodafone!

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Piers: Are you wearing make-up, George?

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George: Course I am. Plenty of men wear make-up... Boy George... Marilyn Manson... Judith Chalmers...

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Piers: Hmm... Perfectly normal, then...

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[At the bookies]

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Arnie: Terry, I just got another hot tip... "Barnacle Bill" in the 2.30 at Haydock Park!

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Terry: OK, and I’ve got a tip for you!

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Arnie: I'm listenin'!

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Terry: (He points to his left) Start running in that direction, very very fast!

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Arnie: Huh?

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