Army Wives Quotes

Pamela Moran: [yellow VW bus takes her spot] Hey Gulligan!
Man dressed in hawaian shirt: Gulligan?
Pamela Moran: That was my parking space.
Man dressed in hawaian shirt: Didn't see you.
Pamela Moran: Like Hell you didn't. [car honk]
Pamela Moran: Give it a rest. [at the hula guy]
Pamela Moran: I had my blinker on and I was waiting.
Man dressed in hawaian shirt: What's the big deal?
Pamela Moran: The big deal is this is disaster number ten and it isn't even noon yet. My water heater's broken, I can't find my cell phone, and now I have to buy five bags of flour so my kids can make a paper mache horsie that's gonna be a frikkin' nightmare, so are you gonna move this damn car or are we gonna stand here doing the hulla all day?
Man dressed in hawaian shirt: [intriqued] What's your name?

Movie: Army Wives
Pamela Moran: We all searched for strength on that first day or two, I did. But whether what I found was true strength or just some part of our DNA that makes us want to reach out and help, I don't know.

Movie: Army Wives
Pamela Moran: At times it feels totally random, this roll of the dice on who lives and who dies. Trevor was alive, Marilyn was dead and the worse was yet to come.

Movie: Army Wives
Michael: Claudia Joy Holden, after seventeen years of marriage my heart still skips a beat every time I look at you.
Claudia Joy: Michael James Holden, after seventeen years of marriage I can't believe that tired old line of yours still works.

TV Show: Army Wives
Trevor: Roxy, you work two jobs right? And you got two kids from two different men. Now, I know I only met you four days ago, but I think you're my soulmate!

TV Show: Army Wives
Pamela: Sit next to the Anti-Christ, going to Hell by association.
Roxy: Oh, I reckon I got you beat on the Hell front.
Pamela: Last week I was a drug dealer. This week I'm carrying the chaplain's kids. You think you can top that?
Roxy: I can try. My kids aren't my husbands. I was married to the first one's daddy till he sucker-punched me. The second one was just a friend who came over to "comfort" me one night. I've known Trevor, my husband, for all of 17 days now. How'd I do.
Pamela: I'm impressed.

TV Show: Army Wives
Pamela: [In labor] Vodka and a hammer. I need vodka and a hammer!

TV Show: Army Wives
Pamela: [Seeing the look on Roland's face as she gives birth] You having a good time?
Roland: Let's just say childbirth is disgusting as it is miraculous.

TV Show: Army Wives
Roxy: Give me everything you've got baby doll or you're gonna be looking at me from the floor.

TV Show: Army Wives
[Jeremy knocks at Claudia Joy's door, Amanda opens it]
Amanda: Look everybody, it's Jeremy Sherwood -- How are you?
Jeremy: Great -- Uh -- Amanda, you look great!
Amanda: So do you.
Jeremy: So, when did you get home?
Amanda: About 90 minutes after I got arrested.
Jeremy: Arrested?
Amanda: I take it you haven't been watching the news?
Jeremy: I hate that show, it's too depressing.

TV Show: Army Wives
[At the donation gathering, at the podium]
Pamela: Hey -- It's me, Pamela Moran. I just want to let you all know, I made fifty grand carrying those kids. That's right, I was a paid surrogate. So, they're not my babies, they're not in the hospital, they're not dead and I lied to everyone. So -- Have at it!

TV Show: Army Wives
Trevor: Roxy, I was adopted, but not until I was 7. Until then it was just foster care. I don't want to adopt your boys because I'm afraid I'm going to die -- I want to adopt them because I want them to really know what it's like to have someone really want them. It's like I said, I'm coming home.

TV Show: Army Wives
Pamela: Marilyn is having an affair, and you waited until now to tell me?
Roxy: Well, excuse me, but I worked until midnight last night.
Pamela: Well, my phone works twenty-four hours a day! And so does my front door!

TV Show: Army Wives
Roxy: It's hotter than the hinges on the gates of Hell.

TV Show: Army Wives
Roxy: My favorite designer is the Goodwill.

TV Show: Army Wives
Trevor: I jump to conclusions. I'm a terrible cook, I forget names and I'm clumsy, hence the knee. I can be impulsive and sometimes a little bit too sensitive.

TV Show: Army Wives
Roxy: I can be jealous, but I'm working on it. I can be outspoken, but I'm really not working on that. I haven't read many books, not really the best speller. I don't want any more kids, at least not now, but I'm with you. I love to practice.

TV Show: Army Wives
[Roxy has announced that she and Trevor finally went a night without having sex]
Claudia Joy: I'm impressed.
Pamela: I'm jealous.
Denise: I'm speechless.
[all girls turn to Roland]
Roland: I'm not here. Please leave a message.

TV Show: Army Wives
Pamela: Hey, you guys, Claudia Joy is doing okay, huh? You've gotta admire how she's been handling things, especially with Mrs. Lenore Baker trying to take her down like that.
Roxy: Do you really think she would use what happened against Claudia Joy like that?
Pamela: That's how it works around here sometimes.
Roxy: Well, what do we do?
Denise: We stick together. We support Claudia Joy, no matter what.
Roxy: We deep fry Lenore Baker and serve her up with a side of hush puppies!

TV Show: Army Wives
Roxy: Fastest way to a man's zipper; tight jeans, new haircut.

TV Show: Army Wives
Pamela: [on the air describing her new call-in show] Ok, uh, so much for announcements. Now for a little call-in segment that I'm calling 'Have At It With Pamela Moran.' Where we talk about us – the Army Wives – and what we go through. Like how it feels to be a single mom even when you're married. Or, better yet, what it's like to be the mistress 'cause the Army is the wife and sometimes that bitch gets all the attention! You know, they say, 'Mission First. People Always.' But that's crap. And what the hell does that mean, anyway? Because the Army comes first - period. And we deal with it or we move on. And it doesn't matter if your spouse wears sergeant's stripes, or, or colonel's eagle. Because worrying about your soldier at wartime feels exactly the same. So, forget rank, 'cause people are just people. And uh, speaking of which - I know we all like to gossip, but come on folks, can we just stop all the lies and innuendos about a certain colonel's wife. I mean, what the hell folks! Did we all lose direction to the high road, or what?

TV Show: Army Wives
Victoria Grayson: [to Claudia Joy] Getting older is like being punished for a crime you didn't commit.

TV Show: Army Wives
[After Roxy and Pamela are confronted by Marilyn about Pamela having Scott over for Pizza]
Roxy: So, you still think having your own microphone to tell the world off is a bad thing?

TV Show: Army Wives
[In response to a caller on her radio show asking about what to expect when her husband comes home from war]
Pamela: My man just came back and got a heroes welcome, lemme tell ya he knows how to shoot off the fireworks, we're talking 21-gun salute, so stay hydrated.

TV Show: Army Wives
Trevor: Rox, you are one of the smartest people I could do anything.
Roxy: You know the difference between a lawyer and an accountant? An accountant knows he's boring. [kisses Trevor] I'm happy where I am right now.

TV Show: Army Wives
Roxy: Do you remember the trek from Tuscaloosa?
Trevor: [glancing at the boys] How could I forget? TJ threw up on me twice, Finn peed on me, and you broke the dial fighting over the radio station.
Roxy: Good times.
Trevor: [smiling] Hmmm...good times.

TV Show: Army Wives
Finn: [standing beside TJ as Trevor says good bye to the boys] Please stay.
Trevor: [to Ari and Ilan] Well, you know why I have to go. But I'm gonna come back as soon as I can, and when I get home, I'm gonna tell you guys stories about everything I've seen. So, be brave for me, okay? Take care of your Mom, she's gonna need it. Come here. [kneels to hug both boys, and picks up his rucksack to leave, as Roxy tries not to cry]
[TJ stands still, still staring at Trevor]
Trevor: What's the matter, buddy?
TJ: It's just that we've never had a Daddy before.
Trevor: [bending to look TJ straight in the eyes] I love you.

TV Show: Army Wives
Claudia Joy: [to Betty] When is your surgery?
Roxy: She's not having it.
Claudia Joy: [concerned] Why not?
Roxy: She's short three grand. I keep telling her to sell the Hump Bar, but she won't.
Betty: This place has been truer to me than any man I've ever been with, Roxy. I can't sell it. It's better we just go out together.
Claudia Joy: There has to be something we can do.
Roland: Yeah.
Betty: [shrugging] Forget it. I mean, who needs surgery? It's like putting lipstick on a pig.

TV Show: Army Wives
Pamela: [over the air on her show, 'Have At It'] Ok, so in case you were wondering why it's been so busy on Fort Marshall today, it's because we've gone to FP Con Alpha Plus, and we know 'Alpha' relates to the global threat of terrorism. But...hell, we've been to Alpha Plus here before. We've bought the gas masks, we've stocked up on bottled water. But, there's one thing we can never be prepared for, and that's the fear. How do we handle the fear? My son Lucas once asked me if the 'bad guys' were going to blow us up. How do you answer that? How do you explain terrorism to your kid? How do you explain that at any time, any place, someone could just decide to take us all out? And that's why terrorism works, because we can't explain it, we can't predict it, it can happen any time, anywhere, by anyone. So, all we can do is trust that the military has our backs, and then we let it go. Because the only way to stop the fear is by living. Just living, being with your family, your friends, your community. Look, there is nothing we can do about it - except to seize the day. We live while we can, laugh while we can, love while we can. And that, my friends, is how we beat terrorism. So, 'Have At It.'

TV Show: Army Wives
Claudia Joy: UVA doesn't know how lucky they are.
Amanda: [her head on her mother's shoulder] Why?
Claudia Joy: Why? Because they're getting the best Political Science major they'll ever have.
Amanda: Mom, don't exaggerate.
Claudia Joy: I'm not. I'm serious. I can see the woman you're going to be. You haven't caught sight of her yet, but she's just around the corner. And I'm damn glad that test was negative.

TV Show: Army Wives