Criminal Minds Quotes

[JJ introduces Reid to Det. Castro as he clumsily drops everything he’s carrying.]
Det. Castro: A genius you said?
JJ: Yeah, uh, his coordination drops off when he’s thinking.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
[During the profile briefing]
Det. Castro: Okay, this scumbag has issues. We all get it. But why fire?
Reid: He's, uh, like a drug addict. Only fire's his drug, and each time an addict needs a fix, they need more of the drug to get off. So his crimes will most likely get much worse. Be, almost impossible for him to quit without help.
Hotch: Thank you very much.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Garcia: Brace yourselves. I'm going to teach you the meaning of L.U.S.T.
Gideon: Did she say lust?
Garcia: Mm-hm. I cross-referenced every known fact on the victims and I just found a website that links both Dennis Cutler and Mathew Jarvis' companies on a list of businesses guilty of L.U.S.T.
Hotchner: I'm missing something.
Garcia: Leaking Underground Storage Tanks. The website belongs to a recently formed San Francisco chapter of the Earth Defense Front.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Gideon: When he arrives, bring the fake bodies right past us nice and slow. I want him to get a good look.
Lt. Vega: Remind me never to play poker with you guys.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Prentiss: All those people, no booze or music. That's either a very lame going away party, or an EDF meeting.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Hotchner: I catch killers. I save lives. I'm a hero until my key hits my front door and then I'm just the father and the husband who's never there.
Gideon: Yeah I got that one.
Hotchner: Here's the thing. When I'm home, I'm in this silent panic because I know that I have to be as good as I can, as fast as I can because any minute the phone is gonna ring and my time is up.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Hotchner: Gandhi said, "Live as if you were to die tomorrow, learn as if you were to live forever."

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Prentiss: An old Russian proverb reminds us, "There can be no good without evil."

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Reid: These tattoos are like books on their skin. It tells their whole life story.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Natalya: I am just like my mother. When she is upset, she cooks.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Arseny Lysowsky: [to Gideon and Reid] Would you like something to eat? This borscht is exquisite, it is my mother’s old country recipe.
Reid: Didn’t you forsake all your relatives when you swore the Thieves' Code?
Arseny Lysowsky: I didn’t forsake her recipes.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Ambassador Elizabeth Prentiss: How are you enjoying your assignment to the BAU?
Prentiss: Well, enjoying is an odd description.
Ambassador Elizabeth Prentiss: Is it?
Prentiss: We deal with some pretty horrible things.
Ambassador Elizabeth Prentiss: I thought that was where you wanted to be.
Prentiss: It is.
Ambassador Elizabeth Prentiss: Then you do enjoy it.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Anton Gorban: I mind my own business.
Gideon: You've been watching us since we got here.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Garcia: [answering phone] Your friendly neighborhood Oracle of all things knowable and unknowable at your service.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Garcia: [regarding Lysowsky] He served 23 years in four remote prisons at Perm, that is a remote region of the Northern Ural Mountains, for those of you playing the home game.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Morgan: How could I have not seen this?
Reid: How could any of us, man?

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Reid: They didn't wait?
Gideon: They cut off his ear. They increased the ransom and left a note.
Reid: How much money do they think they have?

TV Show: Criminal Minds
SSA Josh Kramer: [to Gideon regarding the lack of statement from the victims] Cause we're dealing with criminals.
Reid: Obviously.
SSA Josh Kramer: Not just the kidnappers, genius.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Prentiss: "Happy families are all alike. Every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." -Leo Tolstoy.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Gideon: "One man's wilderness is another man's theme park." Author unknown.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Prentiss: [in a bar, acting very excited] Ladies, this is Brad – a real FBI agent!
Garcia: Really?
Prentiss: Really!
JJ: No way!
Garcia: That's exciting! What's it like at Quan-ti-co?

TV Show: Criminal Minds
JJ: Must be tough keeping all those secrets.
Brad: It’s a skill, like anything else. Carpenters are good at building stuff, measuring. The FBI’s good at keeping secrets and kicking criminal ass.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Prentiss: Can we see it?
Brad: See what?
Prentiss: Your badge.
Garcia: Please?
Brad: Sorry, that's...
Prentiss, JJ, Garcia together: Classified
Prentiss: [she holds up her badge] Tell me Brad, does it look anything like this?
JJ: [hold up hers] Or this?
Garcia: [holds up hers] Or maybe, this?
[Brad hurries away]

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Prentiss: The British historian James Anthony Froude once said, "Wild animals never kill for sport. Man is the only one to whom the torture and death of his fellow creatures is amusing in itself."

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Hotchner: "Of all the preposterous assumptions of humanity, nothing exceeds the criticisms made of the habits of the poor by the well-housed, well-warmed, and well-fed." -Herman Melville.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Morgan: [to Mona, a homeless woman] Be careful, you hear me? This world needs all of its beautiful ladies, and that means you, too, momma.
[Mona smiles and walks away]
Emily: You’re a good guy.
Morgan: Ya think?
Emily: Yeah, you make the people around you feel good.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Hotchner: You have Chaplin on film?
Gideon: My great-granddad was an accountant at one of the first movie studios.
Hotchner: He was in California?
Gideon: No no no, Chicago. Essanay Studios closed, 1920. Back then four out of five movies made in the U.S. were made in Chicago. They closed down, they let my grandpa take, ehh, a couple of extra prints home.
Hotchner: [amused] They let him?
Gideon: [laughing] Well, that’s the family story... we’re sticking to it.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Reid: You see, the word "coincidence" implies more...
Morgan: Hey! Hey, kid. We do not need a vocabulary lesson right now.
Reid: Right. Sorry.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Morgan: What did you guys get?
Hotch: Well, Reid got propositions from every prostitute we talked to, but we didn't find anybody who thinks they've seen the unsub.

TV Show: Criminal Minds
Hotch: "Nothing is permanent in this wicked world— not even our troubles." -Charles Chaplin.

TV Show: Criminal Minds