Chuck Quotes
Casey: [his toe has just been shot] I survived three wars without losing so much as a finger nail before I met you, Bartowski!
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck : But it's, it's Christmas. Look I'm not buying the whole Scrooge act. Underneath that spy cover is a regular person, just like the rest of us. I mean honestly, how weird could Christmas have been for you?
Sarah: Christmas at the Burton household meant the annual Salvation Army con job.
Chuck: Okay, you're a little different than the rest of us.
Sarah: Christmas at the Burton household meant the annual Salvation Army con job.
Chuck: Okay, you're a little different than the rest of us.
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck: Actually, um... I have something for you. I was gonna give it to you tomorrow, but considering the circumstances I kind of want to give it to you today.
Sarah: Chuck, we're gonna get out of here. We'll be fine, I—
[Chuck pulls out a bracelet]
Sarah: —promise. Wow. It's beautiful.
Chuck: It's good luck. It was my mom's charm bracelet. My dad gave it to her when Ellie was born.
[Chuck puts it on Sarah's wrist]
Sarah: Oh Chuck, I can't take this. This is something real. Something you should give to a real girlfriend.
Chuck: ...I know.
Sarah: Chuck, we're gonna get out of here. We'll be fine, I—
[Chuck pulls out a bracelet]
Sarah: —promise. Wow. It's beautiful.
Chuck: It's good luck. It was my mom's charm bracelet. My dad gave it to her when Ellie was born.
[Chuck puts it on Sarah's wrist]
Sarah: Oh Chuck, I can't take this. This is something real. Something you should give to a real girlfriend.
Chuck: ...I know.
TV Show: Chuck
Mauser: You may have beat me, Agent Walker. But FULCRUM's won. I know that Chuck Bartowski's the Intersect.
Sarah: Chuck's secret is safe! And you're going straight to a CIA detention facility never to be seen or heard from again!
Mauser: You go right ahead, Agent Walker. Arrest me. But say "Good-bye" to Chuck. You see I'm not like those other FULCRUM agents. They'll do whatever it takes to find me. And when they do, every FULCRUM agent we have will know Chuck's the Intersect. It's going to be the end of his pathetic existence. So take me in, Agent Walker.
[Pause. Sarah lowers her weapon. Long pause. Sarah shoots Mauser]
Sarah: Chuck's secret is safe! And you're going straight to a CIA detention facility never to be seen or heard from again!
Mauser: You go right ahead, Agent Walker. Arrest me. But say "Good-bye" to Chuck. You see I'm not like those other FULCRUM agents. They'll do whatever it takes to find me. And when they do, every FULCRUM agent we have will know Chuck's the Intersect. It's going to be the end of his pathetic existence. So take me in, Agent Walker.
[Pause. Sarah lowers her weapon. Long pause. Sarah shoots Mauser]
TV Show: Chuck
Ned: [talking about Casey] Hey, hey, I uh, feel terrible about shooting your friend's toe off.
Chuck: No, no, no, that's okay. Sometimes I feel like shooting him myself.
Chuck: No, no, no, that's okay. Sometimes I feel like shooting him myself.
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck: I watched you kill that FULCRUM agent in cold blood, Sarah. I am, I am not like you. Okay? I might have all these government secrets in my brain, but that does not make me a real spy. I, I need to tell you this in reality, not in my dream.
Sarah: Chuck... this isn't a dream.
Chuck: What is it?
Sarah: It's a nightmare!
Sarah: Chuck... this isn't a dream.
Chuck: What is it?
Sarah: It's a nightmare!
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck: How much tranquilizer did you use?
Casey: It's high grade at a heavy dose. Mr. Martin should be out for 12 to 24 hours.
Tyler Martin: [Starts to wake up] Jet lag is brutal.
Chuck: Rock star metabolism.
Casey: It's high grade at a heavy dose. Mr. Martin should be out for 12 to 24 hours.
Tyler Martin: [Starts to wake up] Jet lag is brutal.
Chuck: Rock star metabolism.
TV Show: Chuck
Sarah: Well you don't have plans, do you?
Chuck: Would it be so crazy if I did have plans? Plans that involved something other than fixing computers or playing hot potatoes with a thermite grenade?
Casey: Yes.
Chuck: Would it be so crazy if I did have plans? Plans that involved something other than fixing computers or playing hot potatoes with a thermite grenade?
Casey: Yes.
TV Show: Chuck
Sarah: You know Casey's right. You could've gotten yourself killed. What exactly were you thinking?
Chuck: What was I thinking? I'll tell you what I was thinking. I was thinking like I wasn't a spy. I was trying to have a little bit of fun. And I knew the second I called you two, it would all be over!
Sarah: But you are a spy. And you should know better than to put yourself in a dangerous situation where I can't protect you!
Chuck: Is it really so wrong for me to want a night off? I was having a really good time until the assassins stole my pants and tried to kill me. I've earned it. I deserve it.
[Casey shoots him with a tranquilizer dart]
Chuck: I'm losing consciousness.
[Chuck falls to floor unconscious]
Sarah: CASEY!
Casey: My ears couldn't take it. Either that or I shoot him.
Chuck: What was I thinking? I'll tell you what I was thinking. I was thinking like I wasn't a spy. I was trying to have a little bit of fun. And I knew the second I called you two, it would all be over!
Sarah: But you are a spy. And you should know better than to put yourself in a dangerous situation where I can't protect you!
Chuck: Is it really so wrong for me to want a night off? I was having a really good time until the assassins stole my pants and tried to kill me. I've earned it. I deserve it.
[Casey shoots him with a tranquilizer dart]
Chuck: I'm losing consciousness.
[Chuck falls to floor unconscious]
Sarah: CASEY!
Casey: My ears couldn't take it. Either that or I shoot him.
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck: He had threatened my family, my friends, and you were just doing your job. I get that but... Sarah, the guy was unarmed. And, and you just...
Sarah: I did what I had to do. He knew who you really were. Your whole family was in danger. And I'm sorry. Sometimes I forget you never asked for all of this.
Sarah: I did what I had to do. He knew who you really were. Your whole family was in danger. And I'm sorry. Sometimes I forget you never asked for all of this.
TV Show: Chuck
Sylvia: Mr. Carmichael, I didn't expect you to come so quickly.
Chuck: Charles Carmichael always comes quickly.
[awkward pause]
Casey: [over watch-phone] Smooth, Bartowski.
Chuck: Charles Carmichael always comes quickly.
[awkward pause]
Casey: [over watch-phone] Smooth, Bartowski.
TV Show: Chuck
Morgan: Gentlemen, I think I speak for all of us when I say that the only reason I took this job at the Buy More was to do as little work as humanly possible.
[Jeff and Les nod]
Morgan: The big man has made that dream a reality.
Lester: The man's an inspiration to slackers everywhere.
Jeff: Until his old lady dumped him.
Morgan: We're screwed! I mean screwed now that he has nothing to live for except work.
[Jeff and Les nod]
Morgan: The big man has made that dream a reality.
Lester: The man's an inspiration to slackers everywhere.
Jeff: Until his old lady dumped him.
Morgan: We're screwed! I mean screwed now that he has nothing to live for except work.
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck: Well, gotta run. You know how it is... the old ball and chain.
Sylvia: Listen Charles, I just live right across the street. So... call me, when the honeymoon's over. I've got a chain too.
Sylvia: Listen Charles, I just live right across the street. So... call me, when the honeymoon's over. I've got a chain too.
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck: Casey, I'm handcuffed.
Casey: Relax, handcuffs are a cinch.
Chuck: Really?
Casey: Yeah, there's a bone in your thumb. Tiny bone. Real easy to break. What you're gonna wanna do is apply torsional pressure until it snaps.
Chuck: I'm not going to break my bone!
Casey: Well in that case, you are screwed!
Casey: Relax, handcuffs are a cinch.
Chuck: Really?
Casey: Yeah, there's a bone in your thumb. Tiny bone. Real easy to break. What you're gonna wanna do is apply torsional pressure until it snaps.
Chuck: I'm not going to break my bone!
Casey: Well in that case, you are screwed!
TV Show: Chuck
Ellie: Well, what happened? What went wrong?
Chuck: I guess something that's been wrong from the start. You know?
Ellie: Are... you guys aren't breaking up, are you?
Chuck: No, no, no, no, no. Trust me. Sarah's not going anywhere.
Ellie: Chuck, I guess I, I don't—I don't know what you're saying exactly.
Chuck: Look El, I know how much you love Sarah. And I know how much you love the idea of us, and us moving forward with you and Devon, but we're not anything like you guys.
Ellie: But you guys seem so perfect.
Chuck: Yeah, I know. I guess, but being in that house with her, it was so close to being perfect. The way I had pictured it would be. Then I realized what was wrong with that picture... And it was us. Sarah and I are never going to be anything more than we are now. But you know what? I'm okay with that.
Chuck: I guess something that's been wrong from the start. You know?
Ellie: Are... you guys aren't breaking up, are you?
Chuck: No, no, no, no, no. Trust me. Sarah's not going anywhere.
Ellie: Chuck, I guess I, I don't—I don't know what you're saying exactly.
Chuck: Look El, I know how much you love Sarah. And I know how much you love the idea of us, and us moving forward with you and Devon, but we're not anything like you guys.
Ellie: But you guys seem so perfect.
Chuck: Yeah, I know. I guess, but being in that house with her, it was so close to being perfect. The way I had pictured it would be. Then I realized what was wrong with that picture... And it was us. Sarah and I are never going to be anything more than we are now. But you know what? I'm okay with that.
TV Show: Chuck
Jeff: Does it shock you that 80% of my encounters with women have been completely without their knowledge?
Chuck: Honestly, I'm more surprised by the other 20%. But look, buddy, I know you're going through a tough time, but I don't feel comfortable stalking another human being.
Morgan: Dude, it's not stalking, okay? It's caring enough about someone to learn things about them they won't tell you themselves.
Chuck: Which is stalking.
Chuck: Honestly, I'm more surprised by the other 20%. But look, buddy, I know you're going through a tough time, but I don't feel comfortable stalking another human being.
Morgan: Dude, it's not stalking, okay? It's caring enough about someone to learn things about them they won't tell you themselves.
Chuck: Which is stalking.
TV Show: Chuck
Lester: What was that about?
Chuck: I'm helping Ellie and Awesome find a band for their wedding.
Lester: Then this, sir, is your lucky day.
Jeff: We'll handle it from here.
Chuck: You're going to help me find a band?
Lester: No, you misunderstand. You found your band. It is WE. [points to himself and Jeff] We'll play your sister's big day.
Chuck: Wait— Wait a minute, you guys have a band?
Jeff: Jeff...
Lester: ...Lester...
Jeff and Lester: JEFFSTER!!
Chuck: That seems very fitting.
Jeff: Originally, we were going to go with the name "Jester," but we didn't want people to associate us with a couple of fools.
Chuck: Obviously not.
Chuck: I'm helping Ellie and Awesome find a band for their wedding.
Lester: Then this, sir, is your lucky day.
Jeff: We'll handle it from here.
Chuck: You're going to help me find a band?
Lester: No, you misunderstand. You found your band. It is WE. [points to himself and Jeff] We'll play your sister's big day.
Chuck: Wait— Wait a minute, you guys have a band?
Jeff: Jeff...
Lester: ...Lester...
Jeff and Lester: JEFFSTER!!
Chuck: That seems very fitting.
Jeff: Originally, we were going to go with the name "Jester," but we didn't want people to associate us with a couple of fools.
Chuck: Obviously not.
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck: I can't betray my best friend. How come nobody gets that?
Casey: Hmm. Semper Fidelis. Means always faithful in the Marines. In civilian life, means putting your friend's well being above your own. I salute you for that, Bartowski. Well done.
[Casey gives Chuck a small salute]
Chuck: Yeah, that's— Thanks, Casey. Yeah. Semper Fi. You know it's a pretty upside down world when this guy's the one picking up the emotional nuances around here.
[Casey winks at Sarah]
Casey: Hmm. Semper Fidelis. Means always faithful in the Marines. In civilian life, means putting your friend's well being above your own. I salute you for that, Bartowski. Well done.
[Casey gives Chuck a small salute]
Chuck: Yeah, that's— Thanks, Casey. Yeah. Semper Fi. You know it's a pretty upside down world when this guy's the one picking up the emotional nuances around here.
[Casey winks at Sarah]
TV Show: Chuck
Sarah: No, I get it; he's your best friend.
Chuck: You know you say that, but I don't think you have a clue what it means. Sarah, I don't have parents. I don't really talk about it because that's the way things are now. But it wasn't always this way. Morgan was there the first day my mom took off. He didn't say much. Because honestly what's a fifth grader supposed to say? But we sat there and split a cherry cheesecake and played Legend of Zelda all night long. And my dad, well that's— that's a whole other story. But Morgan was there for that too. Morgan is more than just my best friend. He's my family! Before you got here, and long after you've gone, Morgan is my family!
Sarah Walker: ...Last night we failed to learn the contents of the Triad's container. And now we don't know what kind of drugs or weapons are floating around the city. And while I appreciate your friendship with Morgan, losing sight of that container endangers many people's best friends, not just yours, Chuck.
Chuck: You know you say that, but I don't think you have a clue what it means. Sarah, I don't have parents. I don't really talk about it because that's the way things are now. But it wasn't always this way. Morgan was there the first day my mom took off. He didn't say much. Because honestly what's a fifth grader supposed to say? But we sat there and split a cherry cheesecake and played Legend of Zelda all night long. And my dad, well that's— that's a whole other story. But Morgan was there for that too. Morgan is more than just my best friend. He's my family! Before you got here, and long after you've gone, Morgan is my family!
Sarah Walker: ...Last night we failed to learn the contents of the Triad's container. And now we don't know what kind of drugs or weapons are floating around the city. And while I appreciate your friendship with Morgan, losing sight of that container endangers many people's best friends, not just yours, Chuck.
TV Show: Chuck
Sarah: I wanted to apologize. I could have been more sensitive before about your friendship with Morgan. It's just— it's difficult. I don't really have anyone in my life like that who cares about me.
Chuck: Yeah, you do.
Chuck: Yeah, you do.
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck: Ooh! Ugh! Oh my God! This is unbearable! My back is killing me, my wrists are chafing!
Cole: This is going to get ugly. What level is his pain tolorance?
Sarah: I'd say about 1 out of 10.
Chuck: What? A one? I'd say I'm at least an 8.
Sarah: Chuck, the torture hasn't even started yet.
Chuck: This is the pre-torture? Okay, okay, put me down for a 1.
Cole: This is going to get ugly. What level is his pain tolorance?
Sarah: I'd say about 1 out of 10.
Chuck: What? A one? I'd say I'm at least an 8.
Sarah: Chuck, the torture hasn't even started yet.
Chuck: This is the pre-torture? Okay, okay, put me down for a 1.
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck: Ellie, Awesome, I have made a very important decision. I am moving out...
Ellie: [Ellie gasps] Yes!
Chuck: And moving in with Morgan.
Ellie: NO!
Ellie: [Ellie gasps] Yes!
Chuck: And moving in with Morgan.
Ellie: NO!
TV Show: Chuck
Morgan: Uh, why on God's green Earth would he ever ever break up with Sarah?
Captain Awesome: Ask Ellie, it was her idea.
Morgan: Really?
Ellie: What? He said that he didn't think she was the one.
Morgan: [Morgan sighs] There are a few precious things I know anything about in this world. Chuck's one of them. Believe me, Sarah's the one!
Ellie: How do you know?
Morgan: How do I know? It's all over the kid's face. When Chuck is around Sarah, he is the Chuck we always dreamed of, all right? The Chuck that has the potential to do anything in the world.
Captain Awesome: Ask Ellie, it was her idea.
Morgan: Really?
Ellie: What? He said that he didn't think she was the one.
Morgan: [Morgan sighs] There are a few precious things I know anything about in this world. Chuck's one of them. Believe me, Sarah's the one!
Ellie: How do you know?
Morgan: How do I know? It's all over the kid's face. When Chuck is around Sarah, he is the Chuck we always dreamed of, all right? The Chuck that has the potential to do anything in the world.
TV Show: Chuck
Captain Awesome: Whoa!
Morgan: Evening.
Captain Awesome: Talk about low hanging fruit!
Ellie: Oh my God! I'm going to kill Chuck!
Morgan: Didn't Chuck tell you I sleep in the, in the buff?
Morgan: Evening.
Captain Awesome: Talk about low hanging fruit!
Ellie: Oh my God! I'm going to kill Chuck!
Morgan: Didn't Chuck tell you I sleep in the, in the buff?
TV Show: Chuck
Sarah: Chuck, he knows you're the Intersect. We have to go into 24-hour protective detail until further notice.
Chuck: What exactly does that mean?
Sarah: It means we can't break up. And we have to move in together.
[Noticing Ellie, Awesome and Morgan]
Sarah: Well, Ellie's watching; we'd better sell it.
[They hug]
Chuck: Are you sure about this? I mean he's a really tough guy. Maybe he won't talk.
Sarah: Chuck, everyone talks.
Chuck: What exactly does that mean?
Sarah: It means we can't break up. And we have to move in together.
[Noticing Ellie, Awesome and Morgan]
Sarah: Well, Ellie's watching; we'd better sell it.
[They hug]
Chuck: Are you sure about this? I mean he's a really tough guy. Maybe he won't talk.
Sarah: Chuck, everyone talks.
TV Show: Chuck
Sarah: We work for the government, Dr. Busgang.
Perseus: So do I. Tell them, Duncan. We work for the CIA.
Casey: No. The men you work for are terrorists.
[Casey gets slammed against the wall by two agents]
Casey: Hey!
Duncan: Terrorist? We're patriots. Howard, you're a patriot.
Casey: You're spies who've turn your back on your country!
Duncan: You couldn't have it more wrong. Who do you think we are? We do what needs to be done to preserve our nations rightful place in the world. Someday you'll thank us. Well, not you, you'll be dead.
Perseus: So do I. Tell them, Duncan. We work for the CIA.
Casey: No. The men you work for are terrorists.
[Casey gets slammed against the wall by two agents]
Casey: Hey!
Duncan: Terrorist? We're patriots. Howard, you're a patriot.
Casey: You're spies who've turn your back on your country!
Duncan: You couldn't have it more wrong. Who do you think we are? We do what needs to be done to preserve our nations rightful place in the world. Someday you'll thank us. Well, not you, you'll be dead.
TV Show: Chuck
Beckman: Mr. Barker, I understand you were hurt protecting Agent Walker. I am told you showed great courage.
Barker: Just doing my job, General. Actually, it was Chuck who showed great courage on this mission. He was also injured.
Casey: He got clipped by a windowsill. It's as pathetic as it sounds.
Barker: Just doing my job, General. Actually, it was Chuck who showed great courage on this mission. He was also injured.
Casey: He got clipped by a windowsill. It's as pathetic as it sounds.
TV Show: Chuck
Lester: Morgan. All you have to do is convince Anna that moving in with you is a bad idea.
Morgan: Okay, but how am I gonna...
Lester: Shhh, bubeleh, you've come to the right place. Repulsion is our business.
Jeff: And business is good.
Morgan: Okay, but how am I gonna...
Lester: Shhh, bubeleh, you've come to the right place. Repulsion is our business.
Jeff: And business is good.
TV Show: Chuck
Morgan: I want to make sure that she [Anna] loves me for me and not... other things.
Chuck: Are you crazy? What other things could she possibly be loving you for? I mean listen, buddy, you know that I love you, but you're lucky to have a girl in your life who loves you for you, even though you are in fact you. If you don't stop testing her, she's gonna choose to be with someone else. And then you will have realized, and unfortunately too late, that you lost the catch of a lifetime.
Lester: Counter point. She's not the catch of a lifetime. She's a scheming tart who will harvest your organs and sell them to the highest bidder.
Chuck: Are you crazy? What other things could she possibly be loving you for? I mean listen, buddy, you know that I love you, but you're lucky to have a girl in your life who loves you for you, even though you are in fact you. If you don't stop testing her, she's gonna choose to be with someone else. And then you will have realized, and unfortunately too late, that you lost the catch of a lifetime.
Lester: Counter point. She's not the catch of a lifetime. She's a scheming tart who will harvest your organs and sell them to the highest bidder.
TV Show: Chuck
Chuck: Sarah, I'm not going to move in with you... Because I can't... And you know why I can't... I'm crazy about you. And I always have been. Having a fake relationship, that's one thing. But living together is... I mean everyday and being around each other and —and that's why I can't do it. I hope you understand.
Sarah: I do.
Chuck: Thank you.
[Starts to leave then stops]
Chuck: Oh and, uh, just so you know, I am going to get this thing out of my head, one day. I will! And when I do, I'm going to live the life I want with the girl I love. Because I'm not going to let this thing rob me of that. I won't!!
Sarah: I do.
Chuck: Thank you.
[Starts to leave then stops]
Chuck: Oh and, uh, just so you know, I am going to get this thing out of my head, one day. I will! And when I do, I'm going to live the life I want with the girl I love. Because I'm not going to let this thing rob me of that. I won't!!
TV Show: Chuck