Little Mosque on the Prairie Quotes

Fred: I wouldn't waste a braincell trying to find out.
Fatima: Yes. I'd imagine you are in short supply.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Sarah: I don't remember much about growing up Anglican but I must've been there.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Sarah: Don't we have a New Testament hanging around somewhere around here?
Yasser: New Testament?
Sarah: Yeah or an Old Testament?
Yasser: If we had a new testament surely I would have thrown the old one.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Fatima: It will help your back, and your colon.
Fred: What's wrong with my colon?
Fatima: You're full of crap.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Yasser: My seat smells. Is that why they call it a "pew"?

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Reverend Magee: [Explaining how the Muslims can't pass off as Anglicans] And the way they all stood up, with such vigor! No, no, no, no, no! [He demonstrates] The older... congregants jump right up, as though we just opened up the buffet. And then, some of them lag behind because they're stone-deaf. And then there's always the ones who just draaaaag themselves up like teenagers who've been asked to do the dishes. Now, let's try it again, let's get this perfectly wrong...

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Yasser: When is Easter?
Sarah: April.
Yasser: That's when Baby Jesus sees his own shadow, right?

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
[Fatima just pulled Fred's back into place]
Fred: Fatima sweetheart? That lotion crap you gave me for my back was only to soften me up so you could fix me, right?
Fatima: No. I wanted to see you suffer a little bit longer.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Mother Hamoudi: Oh, thank you for asking... [deadpan] Don't ask.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Johnny: We've [A gay couple] even written our vows in rhyming couplets. What do you think? "I promise to honour but not obey, except on leather fetish day."

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Joe: Whatever happened to the sanctity of marriage?
Reverend Magee: Sanctity? You've been divorced three times!

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Fatima: Another muffin?
Reverend Magee: I'd never forgive myself... but Jesus will. Bring it on.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Mother Hamoudi: Samira would cook for you. Her couscous is heavenly, tastes like angel droppings.
Yasser: Mmmm... my favourite type of droppings.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Rayyan: [ausculting Mother Hamoudi] You're fine! We could fox-trot to the beat of your heart! [pause] I have been watching way too much Dancing with the Stars lately.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Baber: Don't make us give you your notice.
Amaar: Baber, you're forgetting: we're the tenants, he's the landlord.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Yasser: I told her [he would not marry Samira]... And then she had a mild heart attack.
Sarah: Then tell her again and finish the job!

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Mayor Popowicz: How long are you going to sleep in my office?
Sarah: Until Yasser stand up to his mother.
Mayor Popowicz: Good thing I'm running for a third term.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Joe: I heard you were planning a demonstration on Sunday.
Baber: Yes. Against the abomination.
Joe: Oh. I thought it was...
Baber: Yes, against gay marriage. I just... like to say "abomination"!

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Yasser: Are you sorry you doubted me?
Sarah: No, sometimes I'm sorry I married you.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Jeff: [a firefighter] You save lives too.
Rayyan: True. But you make house calls.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Baber: As Allah is my witness, I have no imagination! None!

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Yasser: What kind of normal person has any interest in Islam?
Rayyan: You mean besides us Muslims, dad?

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Amaar: So you're saying... They were actually... Holding hands?
Baber: I wasn't saying it. I was yelling it!

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Baber: Layla must be protected from the influence of this... Pop tart!

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Rayyan: That's because there's nothing wrong with you!
Jeff: I know. I just wanted to see you again.
Rayyan: Okay, there is something wrong with you.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Layla: My father is sending me to an islamic school to become an islamobot!

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Fatima: You're an impossible man!
Baber: I am entirely possible!

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Amaar: A man is not allowed to touch a Muslim woman unless he is her brother, her father or her husband.
Jeff: Not even if she needs mouth-to-mouth?
Amaar: You keep your mouth away from her.
Jeff: She'd be unconscious.
Amaar: You'd kiss an unconscious woman?!

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Jeff: I don't mean to be culturally insensitive here but... What the hell?

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie
Sarah: Don't ruin this for Rayyan.
Yasser: I'm her father. It's my job to ruin it for her.

TV Show: Little Mosque on the Prairie