Freakazoid! Quotes

Dexter Douglas: O-O-O-O-O-O-OH, FREAK OUT!(melts into the ground and resolidifies as Freakazoid)
Freakazoid: Is it me or am I showing up later & later in each episode? (then talking like Jerry Lewis) OH, LOOK AT ALL THE NERD PEOPLE MAKING THE FUNNY JERKING MOTIONS WITH THEIR SILLY HEADS!!!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
[Freakazoid is at a recent crime scene committed by Cobra Queen. He notices a piece of shedding from one of her snakes.]
Freakazoid: Ah-ha, looks like one of Cobra Queen's little pets. [turns to the officers, and says this with poor lip sync] Or maybe it was a tourist who got too much sun, I'm never sure.
[Flips to blue screen with only Freakazoid showing]
Freakazoid: Please, let's watch the lip sync, okay?
[A giant set of lips sinks into the ocean]
Freakazoid: I thank you.

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: I'm not going down there. It smells like poo-gas!!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Cobra Queen: If it isn't my dear friend, Atomic Boy.
Freakazoid: Freakazoid. I'm Freakazoid.
Cobra Queen: Oh! I'm so terribly sorry, Freakazoid. The light is dreadful down here.
Freakazoid: Nah, forget it Cobra Queen. You know, you should really get some of those Japanese lanterns to brighten up the place.
Cobra Queen: The paper ones? Are they expensive?

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Cosgrove: Y'know, I like jousting so much I wish I could marry it.

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: (finds a small bowl hidden behind a torch) A bowl! I found a bowl! GOOD FOR ME!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: (grumbling about Guitierrez) He's such a weenie.
Guitierrez: (shouting dramatically) I am not a weenie! YOU ARE THE WEENIE!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: To our right is the right wing
everyone: Ooohhhh!!!!
Freakazoid: And at the left is something very special
Lobe: Where?, I don't see anything.
Freakazoid: Booga-booga-booga!!!!!!!
Lobe: Aaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: What's wrong?
Cosgrove: I just remembered. I don't know how to fly.

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: Can't see! Sun in eyes! Must talk like this!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Candle Jack: Excuse me Freakazoid, is there anything I should do?
Freakazoid: Why don't you stay here and... scare the professor!
Candle Jack: Marvelous. [Heads off screen. Professor Jones is then heard screaming loudly]

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: Who are you? What have you done with the others?!
Dr. Mystico: There'll be time for questions later.
Freakazoid: No there won't; the show's over in ten minutes!
Dr. Mystico: Well, if you hadn't wasted all that time in the plane!!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Roddy MacStew: Ever since Guitierrez entered the net, he's been busy setting up some kind of deranged trap for you. When I tried to see what it was, he found me and kicked me out. He's amazingly powerful!
Freakazoid: If it's a trap, why do you want me to go in?
Roddy MacStew: You don't have a choice, lad. The reason you're so weak is that Guitierrez sabotaged the energy field that powers ya here on the outside. If you didn't go in, in an hour or so, you'd be no better than a dried-up piece of fleshy haggis. Oh, he's figured it all out! He's baiting ya, lad. He's made sure you'd have no choice but to go in after him. He means to destroy ya.
Freakazoid: Boy, you've got alot of lines in this show.
Roddy MacStew: AYE! THAT'S WHAT I TOLD THEM! BUT, NO! ALL THE CRUDDY EXPOSITION GOES TO ME! I HAVE TO TALK AND TALK AND FIDDLE WITH THE COMPUTER AND TALK SOME MORE AND FIDDLE AWAY, I FEEL LIKE OBI-WAN CRUDDY KENOBI!!!
Freakazoid: Roddy, settle.
Roddy Macstew: Alright, we're ready.
Freakazoid: Aren't you coming?
Roddy Macstew: Nay, Guitierrez has locked me out. He want's you... alone. THERE! THAT'S THE LAST OF THE CRUDDY EXPOSITION!!! THANK YOU VERY MUCH!
(an audience applaudes)

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Debbie Douglas: (waving goodbye to Dexter from the car) Have a good time, now!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
The Lobe: Don't touch that dial. For the next 40 minutes, I'm in control.

TV Show: Freakazoid!
(The Lobe is watchingSeinfeld)
Newman: C'mon, Kramer, give me the donut!
Cosmo Kramer: Never!
The Lobe: (laughs) The whole key to this show is Newman.

TV Show: Freakazoid!
The Lobe: Now, with just a flick of the switch, my video-zapper will steal every movie, every program, every broadcast ever produced! Not only will I be able to flood the market with counterfeit cassettes - thus crippling the entertainment industry - but I'll never have to program my VCR again!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
(Freakazoid breaks into a room to stop the Lobe - destroying a wall full of TV monitors in the process)
Freakazoid: Hello? Lobe? Is this the right room?
The Lobe: Freakazoid! Look what you've done!
Freakazoid: Sorry. I'm in a hurry.
The Lobe: There's a door not ten feet away. A fine invention. You should try it.

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Duncan: Aawww! What's the matter? Am I ruining your date?
Mr. Douglas: Duncan! Mind your apples, huh!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: FREAK IN! (while shifting back into Dexter, he still is Freakazoid) Uh-oh? (he then comes out of the stall as Oprah Winfrey) ZOIDS! I'M OPRAH WINFREY! OH, FREAK OUT! Okay, let's not PANIC! Let me try it again. FREAK IN! (shifting in as David Letterman) David Letterman?! Oh, FREAK OUT!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
The Bus Boy: Come, she awaits. (While passing every pillar in the restaurant, Dexter changes into Michael Jackson, Barney the Dinosaur, and The Skipper from Gilligan's Island)
The Bus Boy: I have your date.
Steff: That's not my date.
The Bus Boy: Well, of course he is? (gasps) "Skipper" Alan Hale!
Freakazoid: Oh, no. (in Alan Hale's voice) GOODBYE, LIL' BUDDIES!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
The Bus Boy: Here! I've found him.
Steff: That's still not my date.
The Bus Boy: Well, of... (gasps as he sees Freakazoid as Judge Lance Ito) Your Honor, I'm so sorry.
Freakazoid: (depressedly) Me too. See ya.
The Bus Boy: I THINK I'M GOING CRAZY!!!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: (very depressed in a monotone way) Freak In. (shifts into Bette Milder) Oh, freak out. (shifts back into Freakazoid)

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Medulla: That is one happy man.

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: Oh, we've been at this all day! I hate this.
Cosgrove: I know, kid, but it's tradition. No superhero can refuse any request on their birthday.
Caption: IMPORTANT PLOT POINT
Freakazoid: Cosgrove, are you positive that's a superhero tradition?
Cosgrove: What, ya think I'm fibbing? I'm a fibby-boy? I heard it somewhere. Talk to the other superheroes if you don't believe me.
Freakazoid: I can't. They're all away at some conference.
Caption: ANOTHER IMPORTANT PLOT POINT
Cosgrove: I'm wearing blue socks.
Caption: NOT IMPORTANT
Freakazoid: If you put baking soda and vinegar together, they make a little volcano!
Caption: NOT IMPORTANT... BUT INTERESTING

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Woman: It was awful! Awful! JUST AWFUL!!!
Freakazoid: Can you be more specific?
Woman: It was like having to watch Waterworld for a month.
Freakazoid: Anything else?
Woman: (screaming in fear) AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Freakazoid: That should be enough to go on

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Leonard Maltin: Hi, I'm Leonard Maltin. Y'know, many consider "The Island of Dr. Mystico" one of the most pointless Freakazoid! adventures ever made. Interestingly, critics first loved the episodes, but that changed when they found out it wasn't European. However, today's episode does contain some interesting performances. See if you can spot Emmit Nervend in a walk-on role as a salty dance hall shaunteuse. Also-- [an oranguman barges onto the set and abducts him] No! For the love of humanity! Aaaahhhh!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Freakazoid: Wheeee-hee-hee-heee! I'm flying a plane! I'm flying a plane! Boy, being a pilot's really neato!
Cosgrove: You're doing real good, ki-- plane.
[Freakazoid and Cosgrove swerve to avoid oncoming plane.]
[Later on...]
Cosgrove: Blimp.
[Freakazoid and Cosgrove swerve to avoid oncoming blimp.]
[Later on some more...]
Cosgrove: Brando.
[Freakazoid and Cosgrove swerve to avoid a huge copy of Brando.]

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Steph: 'Dat was a quite a jolt, Freak!

TV Show: Freakazoid!
Neighbor: Hey! What are you doing!?
Freakazoid: I'm fulfilling your request; I'm mowing your lawn.
Neighbor: While the Lobe's attacking everybody?! Go get him already! What are you, wacko?
Wakko Warner: No, I'm Wakko! [starts singing]Baton Rouge, Lousiana Indianapolis, Indiana, And Columbus is the capitol of Ohio--

Freakazoid: HEY! Wakko, what are you doing here? We're kind of in the middle of something.
Wakko: Oh, it's OK! Steven loves it when we do stuff like this. After all, Animaniacs is his favorite.
Freakazoid: Uh, sorry to break this to you, Wakko, but if I'm not mistaken, Freakazoid! is Steven's favorite show. We got a memo.
Brain: Ahem. I believe you're both mistaken. It is the sophisticated wit and charm of Pinky and the Brain that has captured Steven's heart, as well as making it the breakaway hit of the WB's schedule.
Freakazoid: Well, why don't we just go find out?!
[Later, at the Amblin Entertainment building, they continue to argue.]
Steven Spielberg: QUIET!!! Now what's this about?
Freakazoid: First of all, Steven, thank you very much for taking the time to meet with us. We realize you're very busy, and--
Brain: Oh, just ask him!
Freakazoid: We were just wondering... who's your favorite?
Steven Spielberg: Who are you people?

TV Show: Freakazoid!