Aqua Teen Hunger Force Quotes

Ignignokt: You have deeply offended us and our god. And our god is a god of vengeance, and horror.
Err: And action!
Ignignokt: Our god is an Indian that turns into a wolf.
Err: Yeah, that's the Wolfen, man.
Ignignokt: Well... the Wolfen will come for you, with his razor.

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Master Shake: [dragging a ridiculously long box into the house] Hey, Meatwad! Your birthday rabbit came!
Meatwad: Well, where is it? Lemme see! Wow... must be a really big bunny!
Master Shake: Sure is! [grunts and struggles to get the box inside]
Meatwad: Hurry up! I ain't got all day!
Master Shake: [stops andstarts pushing the box back outside] No. No, I don't think so...
Meatwad: Hey, now! Wait a minute!
Master Shake: ...because you seem to think I'm some kind of slave now, is that it?
Meatwad: I'm sorry, you can bring the bunny rabbit in here. Now, I need it!
Master Shake: And you can have it! It's *your* snake!
Meatwad: [pause] My snake? But...
Master Shake: Snake...
Meatwad: But you said you got me a rabbit.
Master Shake: ...rabbit. Yes, well... why don't you look inside the box first instead of flying off the handle like this?
Meatwad: [opens box and a snake slithers out] That ain't no damn bunny rabbit!
Master Shake: Well, whaddya know? It's a snake!

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Master Shake: [flexing] Hooah, lookit these guns! [fart]
Master Shake: Oops. I just pooped a little bit.

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Meatwad: [Meatwad rolls up to Carl dragging a bag behind him] Hey Carl!
Carl: Oh great, you've seen me.
Meatwad: Hey, you want to contribute to Sir Loin's hunger drive? He goin' to feed the shorties y'all.
Carl: [Meatwad hands Carl the bag, Carl takes it] Yeah, let me see here. I think I got some, uh, oysters over here.
Meatwad: [Carl proceeds to spit into the bag] Oh, thank you.
Carl: And be sure to thank Sir Loin for keeping me up all night.
Meatwad: Yeah, I do that. Hey, I thought that oysters had shells?
Carl: No, usually, but not these. They were, uh, farm raised... in my throat... with cheese. Hey uh, you want some crabs? Cause I got some of them.
Meatwad: No... no my, my bag's pretty full right now.
Carl: I don't know if they're Alaskan King, but they feel huge...

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
[Shake is going to jump off a cliff so he can become a Highlander]
Frylock: Shake wait. The Highlander was just a movie.
Master Shake: No, Frylock, The Highlander was a documentary, and events happened in real time.

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Meatwad: What's wrong with your elbow?
Romulox: Oh, you didn't get that surgery. I'm sorry.
Meatwad: We don't have insurance.
Romulox: Only two people in the world have the easy-flow elbow, and one of them happens to be named Bruce Willis.

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Carl: Look at my friggin' car, it's crushed to bejesus and back!

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Master Shake: Somebody's a little bi-curious!
Meatwad: I ain't no bi-curious. I'm a man's man!
Master Shake: Not anymore! I've planted the seed of doubt!
Meatwad: You don't say that! I'm a man, and you...if you need me, I'm gonna be in the garage...[in a deeper voice] hangin' Sheetrock, 'round an engine I'm rebuilding.
Master Shake: Look at the way he rolls...
Master Shake: ...just like a woman!

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Master Shake: (Barely awake) George Lesenby...
Frylock: How do you spell that?
Master Shake: Uh... L-E-S-B-I-A-N.
Frylock: (Writes it down) L-E-S-B-I-A-- Shut up! You're spelling lesbian!
Master Shake: Aah, God excuse me.
Carl: (With chicken wings in his mouth) He said lesbian. Hahahaha!

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Master Shake: Well, what's this little to do?
Frylock: My damn mail.
Master Shake: And yet, it is in my hands. Explain that to
Frylock: Shake, Shake. Do you see anything from golf course?

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Frylock: Open it, Shake, open it!
Master Shake: HOLD ON! Have to open it first.

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Meatwad: Dang, boy. You dang doughnut in the dang fairway.
Master Shake: This is freeway, not a fairway. You dang my way, okay?
Frylock: I don't think you want to hit all this. It's not a good life.

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Master Shake: (After winning the tournament, Shake stands on a pedestal with a trophy in hand, with a cheering crowd taking his pictures) Yes, bitches! I am number one in your face! My urine tastes like champagne, I am number one!
Meatwad: (Speaking into a microphone) Congratulations man, this is your first cup championship. We know we gotten close a number of times back in 2001 and 2003, that heartbreaker. But this time, you finally sealed the deal, all because of your caddy, who gave you some really good proper instructions, treated you like the robot that you are cause he's the puppet master pullin' the strings. Tell us... (Gives Shake the microphone) What's going thru your mind?
Master Shake: Well, the big thing I think we all realized out here today is that this sport sucks, big time. (The crowd starts booing him) Golf is for losers. You wanna talk about a real sport, its called "professional football". Cause y'know what, I was scouted in College, I coulda totally gone pro.

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Voice: Finish him!

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Master Shake: Who was that guy?
Meatwad: That's Ultra-Mega chicken, up there. (Shake looks up) Closing in pretty fast.
Frylock: Uh, scoot over, Meatwad.

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Voice: Fatality!

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Carl: Why? Why is it always the best people... that gotta take time out of their day... to see dumbasses get buried?
Meatwad: (Sadly) He always had such a zest for life. (sniffs) Why'd he have get smashed by that big chicken? (sniffs) He was so young.
Frylock: No, he wasn't. He was pushing 40.
Meatwad: Oh well, (someone farts)

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Carl: Hey, this is Carl, and yeah, I'm plenty God for forsaking Kurt Warner in my time of need when he was a New York football Giant. And now He's working in completely mysterious and retarded ways by letting the Cardinals play in the Super Bowl. Listen, the state of Arizona is only good for one thing: testing A-bombs so the people from the good states don't get hurt. Pittsburgh's gonna be up by 24 before O-Town can say "My country, 'tis of thee," but I'm gonna give all you party bookies some Super Dull XLIII over/unders to keep your guests from killing themselves before halftime. Number of human interest stories about Larry Fitzgerald's dad during the pregame show—17; amount of interest I have in a human interest story about Larry Fitzgerald's dad—0. Number of Knight Rider promos we get to see during a booth review—87. Number of times John Madden will somehow work Brett Favre into the conversation and gently stroke his nipple with one of his fat outstretched fingers—9. Number of strippers Adam "Pacman" Jones slaps playfully during his pregame analysis—2; number of strippers Adam "Pacman" Jones slaps not so playfully during his pregame analysis—1; number of times Adam "Pacman" Jones slaps Bob Costas for gently asking not to slap a stripper during his pregame analysis—37. Number of concussions Ben Roethlisberger will suffer during the pregame stretch, "God Bless America", and the coin toss—2. Number of Jonas Brothers riding a surfboard with a computer-generated porcupine in an effort to raise your awareness of Tostito's brand Garlic and Cinnamon Corn Chips—3. Number of children Kurt Warner adopts during the second half—2; number of children Kurt Warner sacrifices to Jesus during the second half cause he was told to in a dream—3. Number of times Anquan Boldin kisses his fist and thanks Jesus for blessing him with running a successful 12-yard slant—1. Number of minutes Jesus actually spends watching the Super Bowl—0. Number of tim

TV Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force