The Internship Quotes

Billy McMahon: That being said, if you want something cold to drink, we'll hook you up.
Stuart: I'm ok, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.
Billy McMahon: I'm your Bill Holden in Stalag 17.
Stuart: I don't even... I really don't get that reference.
Billy McMahon: Google it.
Stuart: Alright...

Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: Whoa, guys, where's all this hostility coming from?
Stuart: Where do you think it's coming from, you big tree. Two fifths of our team is made up of two old guys who don't know shit.

Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: Great big world out there, my friend. Just three inches up, I beg you.
Stuart: [Notices the topless waitress]Oh... wow. [Waitress deep throats Stuarts finger]
Stuart: Holy... shit, that's deep.

Movie: The Internship
Lyle: [approaching Billy and Nick]Nice, there they are! Nice to meet you. I'm Lyle, one of the team managers. Pound me! [raises a fist]
Billy McMahon: Oh, normally, just putting the... the fist up without the words is all that's necessary.
Lyle: C'mon, bro. Fist me, get up in there.
Nick Campbell: Yeah, that's definitely not right.

Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: Geez, Yo-Yo, did you get beat up a lot in school?
Yo-Yo Santos: I was homeschooled by my mom.
Billy McMahon: Did you get beat up a lot in homeschool?

Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: For you this is like teaching a little kid the alphabet, right?
Headphones: No, actually it's like teaching a kid a letter. Just one letter.
Billy McMahon: Yeah. Yeah, your strong point would not be communicating to humans.
Headphones: I know.

Movie: The Internship
Neha: What the fuck was that?
Yo-Yo Santos: I was punishing myself for my inferior performance.

Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: Wh-Why did you bring me over to introduce me to this guy? It's like he was your best friend. You introduced me to Hitler.

Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: Nick? Would I be wrong to call you my brother?
Nick Campbell: Of course not, I'd do anything for my little show pony. Look at me, anything.
Billy McMahon: I need you to ice my balls for me.

Movie: The Internship
Kevin, Matress Salesman: [approaching Nick and Billy]How's it going, Gossip Girls? CW just called - you're canceled.

Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: [to Kevin]Me and you are the same height.
Kevin, Matress Salesman: [shakes head dismissively]We're not the same height. We're not the same height. I'm handsome tall - you're the type of tall where, you walk through the airport, people stop what they're eating and look at you. You're like a freak.

Movie: The Internship
Lyle: Can we talk about the on the line thing for a minute?

Movie: The Internship
Stuart: Quick interjection: When you keep saying 'on the line,' you do mean online?
Nick Campbell: Stuart. Don't do that. You don't do that to a man. He's got a million-dollar idea right here.
Stuart: A billion-dollar idea?
Nick Campbell: Even better. Let him flow!

Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: This reminds me of a little girl from a steel town who had the dream to dance. She had to strip down to nothing, she had to sit in that chair and arch her back and she reached up and pulled that chain to nowhere and doused herself with water!
Stuart: Flashdance? You're talking about the movie from the '80's?
Billy McMahon: You're damn right I am!

Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: No, we can't talk about it later. The future doesn't know later.
Nick Campbell: All the future is, is later. That's literally what the future is. It's later. What are you talking about?

Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: Here's the deal. I'm pretty terrific on the phones. I could sell prosciutto to a rabbi. And I have.

Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: [toasting Yo-Yo's first alcoholic drink]To the night you'll never remember!

Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: [to Yo-Yo just before the lap dance]This is Tapioca. She's studying to be a dental assistant. Enjoy!
Nick Campbell: [after Yo-Yo has an orgasm from the lap dance, he dries his pants]It happens all the time. Some would say it's the point.
Nick Campbell: [after Yo-Yo's second orgasm and he tries to dry his pants again]It's all good. You might want to double up on the underwear next time.
Nick Campbell: [after Yo-Yo's third orgasm, drying his pants again]I got to tell you, the reboot time is impressive. Trifecta.

Movie: The Internship
Neha: I'm sorry, almost? Or you either done or you not, you can't be almost pregnant.
Stuart: Yeah. Hey, she would know guys.
Neha: Why don't you Google asshole, asshole?

Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: So, we say 'no' to love?
Mr. Chetty: Yes, we say 'no' to love.

Movie: The Internship
[first lines] Nick Campbell: What the shit is this? Why is this on the get psyched mix?
Billy McMahon: Because I gotta throw you a curve-ball every now and again, or you get bored, and the mix doesn't have its intended effect.
Nick Campbell: No, I want to get rev'd up, and this song's not doing it.
Billy McMahon: Oh, really? I defy you to crush this chorus and not get psyched.
Nick Campbell: Not gonna happen.
Billy McMahon: Don't ya think? [cranks up the volume and Nick actually starts singing along]

Movie: The Internship
Yo-Yo Santos: My mother hits harder than you!

Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: For whatever it's worth, your imagination is so wild, reality's gonna be a breeze, if not a letdown.

Movie: The Internship
Jeanie: Let me call Kevin.
Nick Campbell: Jeanie... I'm sure your boyfriend's a great guy, but I'm not ready to work for someone who spent all of last Thanksgiving explaining the meaning of his tattoo.

Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: People want to work with people.
Nick and Billy's Boss: People hate people!

Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: People have a deep distrust of machines. Have you seen Terminator? Or 2? Or 3? Or 4?

Movie: The Internship
Neha: I've only read about this stuff, okay? Craigslist casual encounters, Twilight fanfiction, hentai.
Nick Campbell: What's hentai?
Neha: Japanese comic books where the women get penetrated by octopus tentacles.

Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: I might be detecting a bit of an accent.
Dana: You are?
Nick Campbell: Uh huh. I have a very good ear. English, right?
Nick Campbell: [with a mock British accent]'Hello, Governor! Oliver Twist! More bread, please, sir!'
Dana: Australian, actually.
Nick Campbell: Really? Similar flags, though.

Movie: The Internship
Dana: Are you talking about regret?
Nick Campbell: Well, I don't want to add *not* asking you out to that list, because the credit card is maxed out.
Dana: Okay, so, let me establish, you are in fact asking me out on a date?
Nick Campbell: Yes. And I figure I'm such a mountain of mistakes that going out with me just once this evening will be like packing 10 years of bad experience into, ya know, one night.

Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: You know, Google has single-handedly cut into my ability to bullshit.
Dana: Cramping your style?
Nick Campbell: Big time.
Dana: Make you a better person?
Nick Campbell: Yeah, true. 90 Google, 10 you.
Dana: Just 10? Really?
Nick Campbell: Let's call it 20.
Dana: [giggling]You know, I didn't expect that I would like you.
Nick Campbell: I didn't think you'd like me, either.

Movie: The Internship