The Internship Quotes
Graham Hawtrey: Hello, William. I've been watching you.
Billy McMahon: You should choose your words a little more carefully in a bath house.
Graham Hawtrey: In the words of Nelly: 'It's getting hot in here.' And it's getting hot there, too.
Billy McMahon: You should choose your words a little more carefully in a bath house.
Graham Hawtrey: In the words of Nelly: 'It's getting hot in here.' And it's getting hot there, too.
Movie: The Internship
Graham Hawtrey: Zach, eyes off the pizza, mate. God made you lactose-intolerant for a reason, yeah? So fat. So fat.
Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: What the fuck, Sammy?
Nick and Billy's Boss: What the fuck me? What the fuck, YOU?
Nick and Billy's Boss: What the fuck me? What the fuck, YOU?
Movie: The Internship
[last lines] Billy McMahon: Hell of a summer, bud.
Nick Campbell: Hell of a summer.
Nick Campbell: Hell of a summer.
Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: [patrolling retirement community on scooters]How long you been working this territory?
Randy: Three years. You know, you get to build a relationship with the customer - and then they die.
Randy: Three years. You know, you get to build a relationship with the customer - and then they die.
Movie: The Internship
[Billy and Nick are at their employer's office after the company goes out of business] Billy McMahon: [angry]What the fuck, Sammy!
Nick and Billy's Boss: What the fuck me? What the fuck you! Who told you could barge into my office without an appointment?
Nick Campbell: You closed the company? And then you sent us out on a sale that we really needed and have Bob Williams drop that bomb on us?
Nick and Billy's Boss: Bob Williams' got a big fuckin' mouth.
Nick Campbell: Yeah, he does.
Nick and Billy's Boss: Look, you weren't gonna get the sale anyway. Nobody wears a watch anymore. They just check their goddamn phones.
Nick Campbell: Disagree. Cite your sources.
Billy McMahon: The kids, maybe, but there's... there's a broader market.
Nick and Billy's Boss: Lorraine, what time is it?
Lorraine: [checks the time on her cellphone]10: 26.
Billy McMahon: One hip, pioneering secretary does not a cultural trend make.
Nick and Billy's Boss: She 75 years old. Watches are obsolete and so are the two of you.
Nick Campbell: Obsolete? What does that even mean?
Nick and Billy's Boss: It means everything's computerized now! It's cheaper for a machine to tell these companies what to order than an manufacturer's rep. They don't need us anymore.
Nick Campbell: No, people have a deep, mistrust of machines. Have you seen Terminator?
Billy McMahon: Yep.
Nick Campbell: Or 2?
Billy McMahon: Mmm-hmm
Nick Campbell: Or 3 or 4?
Billy McMahon: All of them.
Nick Campbell: People wanna deal with people, not terminators.
Nick and Billy's Boss: People hate people. Times have changed.
Nick Campbell: That's so negative.
Nick and Billy's Boss: What the fuck me? What the fuck you! Who told you could barge into my office without an appointment?
Nick Campbell: You closed the company? And then you sent us out on a sale that we really needed and have Bob Williams drop that bomb on us?
Nick and Billy's Boss: Bob Williams' got a big fuckin' mouth.
Nick Campbell: Yeah, he does.
Nick and Billy's Boss: Look, you weren't gonna get the sale anyway. Nobody wears a watch anymore. They just check their goddamn phones.
Nick Campbell: Disagree. Cite your sources.
Billy McMahon: The kids, maybe, but there's... there's a broader market.
Nick and Billy's Boss: Lorraine, what time is it?
Lorraine: [checks the time on her cellphone]10: 26.
Billy McMahon: One hip, pioneering secretary does not a cultural trend make.
Nick and Billy's Boss: She 75 years old. Watches are obsolete and so are the two of you.
Nick Campbell: Obsolete? What does that even mean?
Nick and Billy's Boss: It means everything's computerized now! It's cheaper for a machine to tell these companies what to order than an manufacturer's rep. They don't need us anymore.
Nick Campbell: No, people have a deep, mistrust of machines. Have you seen Terminator?
Billy McMahon: Yep.
Nick Campbell: Or 2?
Billy McMahon: Mmm-hmm
Nick Campbell: Or 3 or 4?
Billy McMahon: All of them.
Nick Campbell: People wanna deal with people, not terminators.
Nick and Billy's Boss: People hate people. Times have changed.
Nick Campbell: That's so negative.
Movie: The Internship
Billy McMahon: [first time as a Google Tech Support agent]And I want to have you get out there, salsa'ing and grinding up against a complete stranger that you don't even know, having a pretty good time doin' some wrong things. Okay? Are we on the same page?
Movie: The Internship
Nick and Billy's Boss: Luckily, I saw this coming, cashed out my retirement, bought a condo in Miami Beach, new tits for the wife. Silicone. It's legal again.
Movie: The Internship
Nick and Billy's Boss: Luckily, I saw this coming. Cashed out my retirement, bought a condo in Miami Beach, new tits for the wife. Silicone. It's legal again.
Billy McMahon: Wow.
Nick Campbell: Saline's out?
Nick and Billy's Boss: Yeah. Me and the old lady are gonna be tucked away real nice.
Billy McMahon: Yeah, great for you, huh? Perfect. So, uh, that's it right? But what about us, Sammy?
Nick and Billy's Boss: [sighs]You two were great salesmen. The best! But at the end of the day, you're grinders. Foot solders. We all know you'll never be generals. And I'm gonna say something harsh right now.
Billy McMahon: Now you're gonna say something harsh?
Nick and Billy's Boss: Strap it in, boys, 'cause it ain't pretty out there. And you two are dinosaurs. Face it, where you're going... you've already been. [places two watches for Billy and Nick as gifts for them]
Nick and Billy's Boss: I thank you for your service.
Billy McMahon: Wow.
Nick Campbell: Saline's out?
Nick and Billy's Boss: Yeah. Me and the old lady are gonna be tucked away real nice.
Billy McMahon: Yeah, great for you, huh? Perfect. So, uh, that's it right? But what about us, Sammy?
Nick and Billy's Boss: [sighs]You two were great salesmen. The best! But at the end of the day, you're grinders. Foot solders. We all know you'll never be generals. And I'm gonna say something harsh right now.
Billy McMahon: Now you're gonna say something harsh?
Nick and Billy's Boss: Strap it in, boys, 'cause it ain't pretty out there. And you two are dinosaurs. Face it, where you're going... you've already been. [places two watches for Billy and Nick as gifts for them]
Nick and Billy's Boss: I thank you for your service.
Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: [realizing when he's in middle of a game]What the fuck does this have to do with computers?
Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: Why not use emacs rather than vi as the default editor for Ubuntu?
Movie: The Internship
Nick Campbell: Just when you think your day couldn't get any worse, it got worse.
Billy McMahon: I feel like my day bent me over, put a ball in my mouth and fucked me bad.
Nick Campbell: Is it just me or does life look a lot like those hillbillies from Deliverance now? It's got me over by the tree there, just told me I had a pretty mouth. You over, squealing like a pig on all fours. I'm looking, where's Burt Reynolds with the crossbow? He's not coming. We're there. It's gonna happen. You're gonna get raped.
Billy McMahon: You know what it is? I feel like life's inside of me. Just working, just pushing... Just going all after it. And all of a sudden, life pulls out. But he's gonna scurry up the pillow. Boom, just explodes right in my fucking mouth.
Billy McMahon: [the two of them notice a woman with her child on a bench, next to them]How are you?
Nick Campbell: Hey... Hey, cute kid. How old is she?
Woman On Park Bench: She's a boy.
Nick Campbell: Okay.
Billy McMahon: Still very attractive. Without pink or blue it's hard to tell, but the features are great. Maybe put him in some modeling.
Billy McMahon: I feel like my day bent me over, put a ball in my mouth and fucked me bad.
Nick Campbell: Is it just me or does life look a lot like those hillbillies from Deliverance now? It's got me over by the tree there, just told me I had a pretty mouth. You over, squealing like a pig on all fours. I'm looking, where's Burt Reynolds with the crossbow? He's not coming. We're there. It's gonna happen. You're gonna get raped.
Billy McMahon: You know what it is? I feel like life's inside of me. Just working, just pushing... Just going all after it. And all of a sudden, life pulls out. But he's gonna scurry up the pillow. Boom, just explodes right in my fucking mouth.
Billy McMahon: [the two of them notice a woman with her child on a bench, next to them]How are you?
Nick Campbell: Hey... Hey, cute kid. How old is she?
Woman On Park Bench: She's a boy.
Nick Campbell: Okay.
Billy McMahon: Still very attractive. Without pink or blue it's hard to tell, but the features are great. Maybe put him in some modeling.
Movie: The Internship
[When Lyle's team are declared the winners of the Google internship program, Graham then blames his team] Graham Hawtrey: [furious]Well, I hope you're all happy! What were you thinking? Maybe if I had a team of individuals who contributed once in a while, this never would've happened. [to Zach]
Graham Hawtrey: And what about you? What do you have to say for yourself, eh? Huh?
Zach: I think it's time to fake an injury.
Graham Hawtrey: [confused]What are you talking about, you fat... [Zach, who has had enough of his bullying, gives Graham a blow to the chest, immobilizing him. Graham groans]
Zach: [yells]Man down!
Graham Hawtrey: And what about you? What do you have to say for yourself, eh? Huh?
Zach: I think it's time to fake an injury.
Graham Hawtrey: [confused]What are you talking about, you fat... [Zach, who has had enough of his bullying, gives Graham a blow to the chest, immobilizing him. Graham groans]
Zach: [yells]Man down!
Movie: The Internship
Nap Pod Guy: Is this a nap pod or a convo pod? Oh, that's right! It's a convo pod.
Movie: The Internship
Graham Hawtrey: [protests]Hey, why are you getting up? I should be the winner. I should be the winner!
Movie: The Internship
[At Billy's house, a foreclosure notice is seen on the window; Megan, Billy's soon-to-be ex-girlfriend, is about to leave him for good] Billy McMahon: Come on, Megan, listen to me. Honey, let's talk about this. Is this because I'm too unselfish in bed? Because I can change it around. I'm not gonna say it's going to be easy, but I can do it. Megan, listen to me. Honey, it's always darkest before the dawn.
Megan: No, Billy, it's not. It's actually darkest in the middle of the night.
Billy McMahon: We have enough on the table here without arguing about proverbs.
Megan: Look, I knew things weren't great, but to come home to a foreclosure sign?
Billy McMahon: Can we hug it for a second?
Megan: No!
Billy McMahon: Can I touch it?
Megan: No, please.
Billy McMahon: Okay, listen. That could've been avoided if the Bob Williams deal didn't go so bad on me.
Megan: You blew the Bob Williams deal?
Billy McMahon: Well, it's not so much that I blew the deal as much as the company just decided to shut down and take our jobs away. Come on, listen to me, sweetheart. I promise you, I can pay for all of this.
Megan: It's not about the money, Billy. This is about you, okay? You-you talk a big game, but you never do anything about it. It's like you say that we're going to Spain, but have I ever been to Barcelona?
Billy McMahon: Barthelona.
Megan: Ugh!
Billy McMahon: And not yet, but we're going. Vaya co dios, mi amor.
Megan: What?
Billy McMahon: Porque esta bravo en Barthelona y fantastico!
Megan: No, we are not going to Barthelona, okay? We have discussed going to Barthelona, but we are never going to go to Barthelona.
Billy McMahon: Not with an attitude like that, we're not.
Megan: No, Billy, it's not. It's actually darkest in the middle of the night.
Billy McMahon: We have enough on the table here without arguing about proverbs.
Megan: Look, I knew things weren't great, but to come home to a foreclosure sign?
Billy McMahon: Can we hug it for a second?
Megan: No!
Billy McMahon: Can I touch it?
Megan: No, please.
Billy McMahon: Okay, listen. That could've been avoided if the Bob Williams deal didn't go so bad on me.
Megan: You blew the Bob Williams deal?
Billy McMahon: Well, it's not so much that I blew the deal as much as the company just decided to shut down and take our jobs away. Come on, listen to me, sweetheart. I promise you, I can pay for all of this.
Megan: It's not about the money, Billy. This is about you, okay? You-you talk a big game, but you never do anything about it. It's like you say that we're going to Spain, but have I ever been to Barcelona?
Billy McMahon: Barthelona.
Megan: Ugh!
Billy McMahon: And not yet, but we're going. Vaya co dios, mi amor.
Megan: What?
Billy McMahon: Porque esta bravo en Barthelona y fantastico!
Megan: No, we are not going to Barthelona, okay? We have discussed going to Barthelona, but we are never going to go to Barthelona.
Billy McMahon: Not with an attitude like that, we're not.
Movie: The Internship