Sausage Party Quotes

Druggie: [drugged, seeing the food alive]Mr. Sausage, when will it end!
Beer Can: When will it end? When he stops drinking us!
Krinkler's Chips
Sandwich
Pop Tart
Tickilish Licorice: Yeah!
Cookies: And stops eating us!
Sandwich: Same here!
Pop Tart: Fuck yeah!
Toilet Paper: And when he stops using us!
Krinkler's Chips: What did they do to you?
Toilet Paper: [nervously backs away]You don't wanna fuckin' know!

Movie: Sausage Party
Gum: I am sorbitol, maltitol, xylitol, mannitol, calcium, carbonite, soy lecithin, vegetable, triglyceride and talc. But, for expediency's sake. You can call me... Gum.

Movie: Sausage Party
Carl: They are eating CHILDREN! Fucking CHILDREN!

Movie: Sausage Party
Twink: Once you see that shit, it'll fuck you up for life. Good luck! Have fun!

Movie: Sausage Party
Druggie: You're all alive and looking at me with your... with your gloves and your... your little shoes, and your arms and your legs...
Pizza: Legs, huh? Look at me! Look at me! I ain't got no legs, you fuck! You ate my goddamn legs!

Movie: Sausage Party
Baby Carrot: For the love of shit, RUN!
Camille Toh: [notices the Baby Carrots are going to fall off the counter]Whoops. [Baby Carrots fall off the counter, she grabs them]
Baby Carrot: I WANT MY MOMMY! [She eats the Baby Carrots]

Movie: Sausage Party
Gum: Perhaps I can be of some assistance. [Darren shoots Gum]
Gum: [regenerates]Matter cannot be created or destroyed, human. You have made a fatal error in judgement. Let me educate you.

Movie: Sausage Party
Mr. Grits: We're the Non-Perishables, motherfucker.
Twink: We never expired.
Firewater: We are... Immortal. This here's Twink and Grits.
Mr. Grits: They call me Mr. Grits.
Firewater: Eh, Mr. Grits. Whatever.
Mr. Grits: You told him about the crackers?

Movie: Sausage Party
Frank: Banana's whole face peeled off, Peanut Butter's wife is dead! Look at him, he's right there.
Peanut Butter: [screams]I'm gonna fix you, I'm gonna fix this...

Movie: Sausage Party
Potato: [singing]Oh, Danny Boy... The pipes, the pipes are call... [Potato's stomach gets sliced off]
Potato: Ack! JESUS FUCK! [Potato continues to get his skin sliced off]
Potato: Oh! God, me skin! She's peelin' me fuckin' skin!
Carl: What the FUCK? [Potato is about to be put in a pot full of boiling water]
Potato: Jesus, you fuckin' whore! Me eyes! THEY BURN! [gurgles and dies]

Movie: Sausage Party
Carl: Look at these big ol' buns! [wolf whistles getting their attention]
Carl: Ye-ah, you know it, baby! Work those buns! All of you, all day, ur-day, lined up, waiting to get filled with my meat!
Brenda: Yeah. Right, Carl. You really think any of these buns are gonna line up to get filled by you? Here's my impression of that happening: 'Oh! Oh! Is he in there yet? Oh, I can't feel him! I don't think he's in there! Oh, wait he is!' It's so sad! I bet you jackrabbit for a quick fifteen seconds. [jackrabbits mockingly]
Brenda: And then you slump over. [Carl glares at her]
Brenda: [laughs]I mean, honestly, guys! Who in this package would ever let Carl get up in them? [Another bun raises their hand]
Brenda: Roberta, put your fucking hand down! You're ruining my joke. See? Nobody. That's who.

Movie: Sausage Party
Frank
Barry
Carl: [singing with the other sausages]In here, we keep our wieners in our packages. That's how it is.
Brenda: [singing with the other buns]It sucks, but that's the way our butts keep fresh and pure. Baby, baby.
Frank
Barry
Carl: But once we're out the doors, it's not a sin.
Brenda: For us to let you slip it in.
Frank
Barry
Carl: In other words, we finally get to fuck!
Brenda: And love!
Frank
Barry
Carl: And fuck!
Brenda: And hug!
Frank
Barry
Carl: And fuck!
Brenda: And feel!
Frank
Barry
Carl: And fuck!
Brenda: And share!

Movie: Sausage Party
Teresa: I'm not a soft taco, I'm a hard horny taco.

Movie: Sausage Party
Firewater: So, you have learned the terrible truth. Congratulations! Now keep it to yourself, or I'll slit your throat while you sleep. I swear to God.
Honey Mustard: Oh my God! Did you guys just fucking hear that?
Ketchup: What? What are you looking at? [sees Firewater has vanished]
Ketchup: He's gone.
Honey Mustard: Where the fuck did he go? I'm so fucked up, I'm so fucked up! [Ketchup tries to touch Honey Mustard]
Honey Mustard: Jesus! Get the fuck off me! Nobody fucking touch me!

Movie: Sausage Party
Honey Mustard: You're celebrating your doom! Wake up! They're lying to your fucking faces! The Great Beyond is bullshit! Why is anybody listening to me?
Frank: Hey. Buddy, are you all right?
Honey Mustard: No! I'm not all right. It's all a lie. Everything you've been told, everything you believe in.
Carl: Hey, Honey Mustard, you're acting cray cray!
Brenda: Carl, we shouldn't even be talking to this asshole. Everyone knows Honey Mustard's weird. I mean, What is he, Honey? Is he mustard? It's like make up your mind or just kill yourself.
Honey Mustard: You fucking idiots! I've been there, I've seen that shit and there ain't no way I'm going back.
Frank: Wait, wait, wait, wait. You've been to the Great Beyond?
Honey Mustard: 'Great' my asshole! Everything we've ever known is a dirt covered pile of shit. Jacking off in our fucking faces. Covering our eyes with their cum, so cum covered we can't fucking see! We don't know! We don't know, they're jerking off into our eyes! Our faces!
Brenda: Dude, shut up! The gods are gonna hear you talking about that.
Honey Mustard: They're ain't gods! They're monsters, horrible, ugly, disgusting monsters! They ain't gonna get Honey Mustard twice... FUCK YOU, GODS! I've got a date with oblivion.

Movie: Sausage Party
Gum: [explaining why the druggie can no longer see them alive]The human is no longer aware of the fourth dimension... The effects of the opiate have dissipated. Your speech and movements are imperceptible to him... We are totally fucked.

Movie: Sausage Party
Frank: If what you're saying is true, I got to tell everyone!
Firewater: Very noble, little sausage. But also, very pointless. No one will believe you.
Frank: I have to try... Everyone will die otherwise.
Firewater: Oh yeah. That's a good point. Fuck me, right?
Frank: Wait. Do you guys have any proof of this?

Movie: Sausage Party
Douche: What part of I want the sausage and the bun dead, if you see them, come and get me. And if I found out that you didn't come and get me, or if you couldn't find them, I'll fucking kill your ass. did you not understand, Tequila?
Tequila: Uh, it's a pretty confusing sentence, to be honest.

Movie: Sausage Party
Barry: No! We're all gonna die!
Carl: Barry! [slaps him in the face]
Carl: Snap the fuck out of it and run!

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Used Condom: [as Barry goes lost in the alley, in difficulty]I begged them to stop, but then they just went. First, the gods stretched me till it hurt, then they went inside me, and then... And then... SPLOOGE! Look at me! LOOK AT ME! [Barry screams and runs away]

Movie: Sausage Party
Drug Dealer: Hey, man. Be careful with this. Bath salts are the real deal. People been seeing some crazy shit.
Druggie: [takes the bath salts]Awesome.

Movie: Sausage Party
Douche: What's up, little juicy box? You're leaking too, eh bro? And right out of your fucking dingle. Fucking sucks, right?
Juice Box: Dying... so cold...
Douche: [notices that the juice box is leaking, he gets an idea]Uh-oh. Light bulb.
Light Bulb: Yes?
Douche: No. Not fucking you, dummy.

Movie: Sausage Party
Teresa: [staring at Brenda]Saint Chimichanga, I promise to be a good taco...

Movie: Sausage Party
Barry: [as the food prepares to fire the drugged toothpicks]Make it rain. [the food shoots the toothpicks at all the people in the store]
Darren: Ow! What the fuck? All right, who did it? Gary, did you just throw this fucking toothpick at me, man?

Movie: Sausage Party
[Douche seeing that Brenda, Lavash, Sammy Bagel, Jr. and Teresa have vanished and turns to Tequila] Douche: What gives, bro? You told me you had them! So you dragged me over to this fucking aisle with all these illegal products, and now I don't see them. So where the fuck are they? SPILL THE BEANS!
Refried Beans: Que?
Douche: Beans, I swear to fucking God if you don't shut the fuck up!

Movie: Sausage Party
Barry: [while being chased by the drugged humans]Can't this thing go any faster?
Gum: Suck my pink cock!

Movie: Sausage Party
Firewater: Hello there, little sausage. You and your friends have accomplished the impossible and for that, I give you mad props. But, now that you have shattered one truth: It is time for you to learn... that we are not REAL.
Gum: While tripping balls, Firewater and I made an important meta-psychical breakthrough.
Firewater: The world is a fucking illusion, bro. Our lives are being manipulated for the entertainment of monsters, twisted, tasteless, juvenile monsters, puppet masters in the other dimension! We're something called... Cartoons. [Frank, Brenda, Kareem, Sammy, Barry and Teresa gasped]
Frank: What?
Firewater: You, Frank... are a plaything in the demented schlubby Jewish actor named: [the image of a Jewish actor]
Firewater: Seth Rogen.
Frank: Wait. I'm Jewish?
Sammy: So... who am I?
Gum: You are the toy of a more talented and celebrated actor named: [the image of a Celebrity actor]
Gum: Edward Norton.
Sammy: Edward Norton? What kind of parent gives that kid of stupid cunt name like that?
Gum: Worry not, friends. I have a solution.

Movie: Sausage Party
Italian Tomato: [about to be sliced in half]No! Please-a, no! I've got-a famiglia!

Movie: Sausage Party
Firewater: We blaze for real 24/7, no joke, but we also know our shit.

Movie: Sausage Party
Douche: [sees Frank]Oh, so now you're gonna come at me, bro?
Frank: No, I'm coming at you! [prepares to punch him. But Darren tries to grabs Frank]
Douche: Okay, we got him. Easy now, easy now.
Darren: Well, it's hard when your head's up my ass and you're yanking on the scrote!
Douche: Look, sausage... I relish the fact that you mustard the strength to ketchup to me! [to Mustard, Ketchup and Relish]
Douche: Yeah, that's right, shut your mouths. [to Frank, cackling]
Douche: I sucked a juice box's dick, and I'm shoved up a God's asshole, and this is the weirdest thing that I've done so far, bro! [takes a bite of his torso, Frank screaming in pain]
Brenda: [gasps, shocked]Oh, my God! FRANK!
Douche: I'll tell you who eats shit: Gods do, bro... I'M A FUCKING GOD!
Darren: Good-bye, little sausage. [prepares to kill Frank]

Movie: Sausage Party