Big Shots Quotes

Harry March: I am a thief, not a crook.

Movie: Big Shots
Karl: Are you really serious about this? You want Marla to carry our baby.
Wendy: You’d rather our child be carried by someone we don’t know?
Karl: No… but I’d rather it not be carried by someone with the emotional stability of Britney Spears.

TV Show: Big Shots
Lisbeth: [to Duncan] You… you’re like a drug to me. You make me feel amazing for an hour or for a weekend. And then you let me down and I come crashing back to reality. I’m a forty year old woman; it’s time for me to quit chasing that fairytale.

TV Show: Big Shots
Duncan: [to Cameron about hiring Zack] This is who you hired? Where'd you find him, Facebook?

TV Show: Big Shots
Duncan: How can sex ever end badly?
Karl: Maybe not for you, but believe me, I found a way.

TV Show: Big Shots
Marla: Please tell me you're locking the door.
Karl: I...I...I can't work under these conditions. How am I supposed to make a baby with my wife popping in and out of the room?

TV Show: Big Shots
Lisbeth: [to Duncan] Wait a second. What the hell was that? You cannot go around punching people in the face; especially people I’m about to marry.

TV Show: Big Shots
Brody: Let's just say, when it comes to sex. She's the man.

TV Show: Big Shots
Duncan: Men. We're the new women.

TV Show: Big Shots
Marla: What kind of man would be so deceitful as to lie to the woman he’s cheating on his wife with?

TV Show: Big Shots
Duncan: [about Cameron] She's belligerent and headstrong. You can't tell her a thing.
Lisbeth: You should be happy. Proof that she's yours.

TV Show: Big Shots
Cameron: [regarding his drink] That's your third, you know?'
Duncan: I didn't know you were keeping score.
Cameron: I didn't know you needed to get loaded to face your own daughter.
Duncan: You should try facing her, you'd get loaded too.

TV Show: Big Shots
Brody: [about Lisbeth] Maybe you should remarry her?
Duncan: Right, then sex in the wine cellar becomes "Don't touch me I'm exfoliating."

TV Show: Big Shots
Duncan: [to Brody] What kind of world do we live in, women are more men than we are?

TV Show: Big Shots
Karl: It took an affair with a lunatic to get me to appreciate my wife.

TV Show: Big Shots
Brody: It's impressive Karl; the first man in history actually has to break up with his wife and his girlfriend.

TV Show: Big Shots
Karl: Look, I know it sounds crazy but it’s taken my mistress to help me remember how great my wife is. And now that I have, I won’t let anything spoil it.

TV Show: Big Shots
Sara: [about the red Ferrari] Mid life crisis or divorce?
James: Oh, that obvious huh? [Sara nods] Yeah, well… guilty as charged, recently separated.
Sara: Well, I’ve been there, first stage is always hardest.
James: There are stages?
Sara: First stage, wondering if you gonna survive. Second stage, wondering if you’re going to spend the rest of your life alone and third stage, wondering why you didn’t get a divorce sooner.

TV Show: Big Shots
Terrence: A word of warning, I never lose.
Duncan: First time for everything.

TV Show: Big Shots
Karl: How can things be worse than listening to my ex-mistress have sex with a guy who I thought was gay?

TV Show: Big Shots
Wendy: We are so lucky we have each other. Marla has no one.
Karl: Unless you count her multiple personalities.

TV Show: Big Shots
James: Hey I’m a busy guy. Head of a major corporation, I see my kids almost every weekend. Who has time to date?
Duncan: Who said anything about dating? Relationships come in all forms; some last fifteen years and end very badly, some last fifteen minutes and end very, very happy.

TV Show: Big Shots
Karl: The truth, so crazy it just may work.

TV Show: Big Shots
Cameron: [to Duncan] You work thirty hours a day, fifteen days a week and you still have time to cheat on mom?

TV Show: Big Shots
Lisbeth: I’m an idiot. I’m an idiot! What was I thinking? Duncan Collinsworth loves himself far too much to kill himself.

TV Show: Big Shots