Stella Quotes

Michael Showalter: I just threw your dog out the window... again.

TV Show: Stella
Lady Eleanor Blount, aka Aunt Julia: What if that poor creature had spoken to Stella Maris of life - as she knows it?

TV Show: Stella
Michael: You know when Bob Dylan said I have a dream?

TV Show: Stella
Michael Ian Black: [trying to rake leaves, but holding rake upside down] It's not working!
Michael Showalter: [putting leaves in a manila envelope] This will take me forever. The bag is too small.
David Wain: [raking a tree trunk] Where are the leaves anyway? I feel like I'm in hell.
Michael Ian Black: [Mother Nature appears] Mother Nature!
Michael Showalter: [whispers] Mother of God!
David Wain: Mother I'd like to ****!
Michael Ian Black: I like your jeans, Mother Nature.
Mother Nature: How's the yard work going boys?
Michael Showalter: Raking leaves is a lot harder than we thought it would be.
David Wain: [holding up two wine glasses and a bottle of wine] Would you like to have a drink with me?
Mother Nature: [holding wine glass] You need to be at one with nature. Maybe this will help. [snaps fingers]
Mother Nature: [Don't Tell Me by Madonna starts playing]
Michael Ian Black: Madonna!
Michael Showalter: I love this song.

TV Show: Stella
Michael Ian Black: Do it, do it, do it auld maid!

TV Show: Stella
Libby Green: David, do you know my husband, Edward Norton?
David: Not personally, but I'm a fan!

TV Show: Stella
Micheal Ian Black: Hey here's a compromise, instead of listening to funkROCK, why don't we listen to FUNKrock.

TV Show: Stella
Libby: So the unit has 3,000 sq. feet, three beds, three baths, and a nursery.
David: Oh, well, we wouldn't be needing a nursery.
Michael Ian Black: Actually Michael might, because he's kind of a cry baby.
Michael: I am not a cry baby!
Michael Ian Black: Then why are you about to cry?
Michael: Michael, can we please discuss this out on the terrace?

TV Show: Stella
David Wain: How's the soup, Mike?
Michael Ian Black: It's good.
David Wain: Yeah, you won't be saying that after I kill you.

TV Show: Stella
Michael Ian Black: America is the greatest country in the world. Think of all the great things that have come from America...
Michael Showalter: Rugby.
David Wain: Chicken tikka masala.
Michael Ian Black: Chinese people.
Michael Showalter: ASS!
David Wain: [in a British accent] Harry Potter.
Michael Ian Black: Rubber balls and liquor.
Michael Showalter: Then I say something.

TV Show: Stella
Michael Ian Black: I take my coffee the same way I take my women: Strong. Black. And proud.

TV Show: Stella
Michael Showalter: Today's global economy waits for no man.
Michael Ian Black: Interconnectivity... Synergy...
Michael Showalter: Synchronicity... Zenyatta Mondatta...
Michael Ian Black: The Dream of the Blue Turtles...
Michael Showalter: Simon and Garfunkel’s Greatest Hits.

TV Show: Stella
Julie: [talking to Richard] But somebody once told me that sometimes you have to know when to move on.
Michael Showalter: It was me. I told you.

TV Show: Stella
Michael Ian Black: Nothing, I, uh, thought I saw a potato..

TV Show: Stella
Michael Showalter: No, no. It ain't goin' down like that, ese.

TV Show: Stella
Michael Ian Black: How did you get past security without a boarding pass?
David Wain: I know, it's weird.

TV Show: Stella
David Wain: You remind me of fast food.
Woman: [giggling] Oh, why's that?
David Wain: Cause I wanna take you out.
Woman: [flattered, giggling] Oh, haha.
David Wain: ..And then I wanna eat you in my car.

TV Show: Stella
Michael Ian Black: I'm gonna go rub one out and call it a night.

TV Show: Stella
Michael Showalter: I like your tat.
Jemma: Thanks, I did it myself.
Michael Showalter: Really?
Jemma: I like pain.
Michael Showalter: I like cookies.

TV Show: Stella
Michael Showalter: Why are you pointing the gun at me, David? I'm trying to help you!
David: I know, it's weird..

TV Show: Stella
David: Sho's a real turkey, right here.
Michael Showalter: I am not a turkey, David.
David: I'm just-
Michael Showalter: I AM NOT A TURKEY!
David: Michael, it was just a joke.
Michael Showalter: [crying] It didn't seem very funny..

TV Show: Stella
Michael Ian Black: What are we going to do?
David: Call Marcus!
Michael Ian Black: Yeah, call Marcus.
Michael Showalter: Who's Marcus?
Michael Ian Black: I know.

TV Show: Stella
David: I know I can hunt but can Mike hunt? And Mike hunt?
Mountain Man: Of course.
David: No, no, no. But you say it.
Mountain Man: Mike hunt. What are you guys laughing at? All I said was "Mike hunt." Now what's so funny about Mike hunt?

TV Show: Stella
Michael Showalter: I'm cold.
Michael Ian Black: I'm hungry.
David: I'm David. [Makes fart sound]

TV Show: Stella
Michael Ian Black: I don't think I'm overstating anything when I say that I'm really mad at Jane Burroughs.

TV Show: Stella
David: We can just make another copy.
Michael Ian Black: Oh, no you don't. You start doing that, the next thing you know you got Chinese bootleggers selling these things on the streets of Chow Ming for a nickel and a corn dog.
Michael Showalter: That's what I was about to say.

TV Show: Stella
David: What's the first thing you see when you open a book?
Michael Showalter: The inscription.
David: Yes! How about "To Marcus"?
Michael Ian Black: Yeah, yeah. "To Marcus."
Michael Showalter: Who's Marcus? Guys, who the hell is Marcus?
Michael Ian Black: I know, I don't know.

TV Show: Stella
Michael Ian Black: You'll never get away with this Jane. What happens when we tell everyone what you've done?
Jane: Do not make me laugh. I am Jane Burroughs, the darling of the literary establishment. And who are you? Three buffoons.
Michael Showalter: Oh yeah? Well this balloon is going to kick your ass, right now.

TV Show: Stella
Jane: David?
David: Yes, Jane?
Jane: Please, call me Jane.

TV Show: Stella
David Wain: Stupid question but, what is a book?

TV Show: Stella