I Can Do Bad All by Myself (V) Quotes

Jennifer: My Grandma Rose used to tell us to pray about things like this.
Madea: Then that's what you ought to do, pray about it, talk to the Lord about it. He'll help you.
Jennifer: Yeah but she only told us to pray. She never told us how. Would you teach me?
Madea: Huh?
Jennifer: Please!
Madea: Show you how to pray?
Jennifer: Yeah.
Madea: Oh, Lord, child, I ain't talked to God since the last time I saw a cop in my rearview mirror. I guess I can try. You know the number?
Jennifer: The what?
Madea: The number. To call him. They say, "Jesus On the Mainline." I don't know the number. Okay, sit back. Bow your head. First, giving honor to God, to the head of my life. [sings]
Madea: Father, I stretch my hand... to thee. Father God. God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. God of Shadrach, Meshach and the billy goat, who was in the fiery furnace that they barbecued on the day of Pentecost when the Jewish people returned from the Sabbath day up on the mountaintop in Ethiopia. God of Mary J. Blige...
Jennifer: Madea, that doesn't sound right. That's not how Mama Rose used to do it.
Madea: You ain't feel it? You ain't feel the anointing?
Jennifer: No.
Madea: Alright. Well, look, I don't know nothing about praying. But all praying is is talking to God and having a conversation with him. And at the end, you say the name of Jesus. That's your stamp that will get it up there to him. You hear?
Jennifer: Okay.

Movie: I Can Do Bad All by Myself (V)
"Mable "Madea" Simmons: [Picks up the phone and dials the number while panicking] Hello? is this the zoo? We got one of your monkeys over here.

Movie: I Can Do Bad All by Myself (V)
"Mable "Madea" Simmons: [singing] I'm a big fine woman, can I back it up, can I back it up?

Movie: I Can Do Bad All by Myself (V)
Mable "Madea" Simmons: [to Keisha who's 14 and pregnant] I told you to lock down on a boy, clink clink. But it's allright, you gonna pay for having that baby every day of your life, you're gonna finish school, you're gonna take care of that baby, you're gonna get a job and you're gonna put that baby in daycare. If you're old enough to lay there and make it you're old enough to stand there and raise it.

Movie: I Can Do Bad All by Myself (V)