Rome Quotes

[Atia has informed Octavian she has engaged a tutor for him: one of the soldiers who rescued him.]
Octavian: Vorenus?
Atia of the Julii: Is that it? Not the sullen Catonian one, I don't like him. The cheerful, brutish one.
Octavian: [turning to go] Pullo.
Atia: What extraordinary names these plebs have. Pullo.

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Atia: Octavian, have you penetrated anyone yet? Titus Pullo, didn't I tell you to get that sorted? What else?
Octavia: Perhaps you could arrange he kill someone.
Atia: That will happen in due course. We Julii always have the needful enemies.

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Titus Pullo: What's your price, then?
Madame: One thousand.
Titus Pullo: Gerrhae! I could have half the whores in Narbo for that, and their mothers!
Madame: We're not in Narbo, wherever that might be.
Titus Pullo: All right, my dove, we'll pay, but the girl better fuck him like Helen of Troy with her arse on fire, or I'll know the reason why!

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Newsreader: This month's public bread is provided by the Capitoline Brotherhood of Millers. The Brotherhood uses only the finest flour: true Roman bread for true Romans.

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Mark Antony: [to Atia] I had not realized until now... what a wicked old harpy you are.

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Atia: A large penis is always welcome.

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Titus Pullo: This is cack, this is! I'm wet through!
Lucius Vorenus: We're perfectly safe - a very favorable offering was made to Triton before we left.
Pullo: Well, if Triton can't keep me drier than this, he can suck my cock!
[Ship's mast breaks]
Vorenus: Pullo, when will you learn to keep your fat mouth shut?!

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Caesar: Our men must win or die. Pompey's men have... other options.

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Vorenus: His hands trembled, sir. His clothes were dirty, there was water in his eyes -- he is broken. I saw no need to apprehend him. I'd like to add that Legionary Pullo took no part in my decision, sir.
Caesar: You saw "no need." Do you not see that Pompey may be broken like a Dacian catamite and still be dangerous?!

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Pompey Magnus: It didn't seem possible to lose, it's always a bad sign

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King Ptolemy XIII: [presenting the head of Pompey Magnus] We were going to make him a body, with moving arms and legs, and do a mime show with real animals and everything, and...
Gaius Julius Caesar: [furious] SILENCE!
[long, heavy silence]
Gaius Julius Caesar: Shame on the House of Ptolemy for such barbarity. Shame.
Pothinus: But... you are enemies.
Gaius Julius Caesar: (shouts) He was a consul of Rome!
[guards put hands to their swords]
Gaius Julius Caesar: A consul of Rome, to die in this sordid way - quartered like some low thief? Shame!
[another long, heavy silence]
Gaius Julius Caesar: Where is the rest of him?
Pothinus (stammering) It... he, has been cremated. With all proper funeral rites, of course! With all decorum.
Gaius Julius Caesar I will return tomorrow, at which time you will give me the man that took Pompey's life.

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Gaius Julius Caesar: These instruments tabulate the money that was borrowed by the previous king, Ptolemy XII, in the sum of seventeen thousand, thousand drachmae.
Pothinus: Seventeen? Absurd! Four, maybe.
Posca: That amount includes those sums that were borrowed from Pompey and those otherwise unable to collect.
Pothinus: That is not just.
Posca: Post mortem interests of this type are legally entailed to the presiding consul, i.e. Gaius Julius Caesar. It's... law.
Pothinus: Roman law.
Gaius Julius Caesar: Is there some other form of law, you wretched woman?

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Caesar: I have conquered Gaul. I have defeated Pompey Magnus. I think I can handle a small boy and a eunuch.

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Marc Antony: I'm glad you're so confident. Some would call it hubris.
Caesar: It's only hubris if I fail.

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Vorenus: Pullo, report to Princess Cleopatra and do whatever she tells you!
[Pullo reports for duty - which is to have wild sex with Cleopatra. Afterwards: ]
Pullo: [exhales] Gods, that was something, let me tell you...
Vorenus: I don't want to hear about it! If you're wise, you'll never speak of this again.
Pullo: Why? I was only obeying orders. Bloody good orders, too!

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Cicero: You should have no ill conscience, we only did what we have to do.
Brutus: No doubt Saturn said something of the sort after eating his children.

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Marc Antony: If I ever again hear your name connected with murmurs of treachery, I will cut off these soft, pink hands and nail them to the senate door.

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Scipio: Where there's life, there's hope.
Cato: (sad smile) I think, if anything, we have disproved that proverb, old friend.

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Titus Pullo: [on Vorenus' toga candida] You look like laundry!

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Posca: The Roman people are not crying out for clean elections. They are crying out for jobs. They are crying out for clean water, for food, for stability and peace.

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Caesar: You know I've always looked upon you as a son...
Brutus: Oh dear, not one of those conversations.

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Caesar: Be reasonable! You're on every wall in the city with a knife at my throat!
Brutus: Only tyrants need to worry about tyrant killers!

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Marcus Junius Brutus: I betrayed nothing. Had you told me you were to march on Rome and asked me for my allegiance, I would have given it. I would've judged you insane, but I would've given you my allegiance because I look on you as my father.
Caesar: Brutus-
Marcus Junius Brutus: You did not ask me for my allegiance. You demanded it at swordpoint. I betrayed nothing.

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[Before Caesar's funeral.]
Antony: I've never fucked a woman in a funeral dress before.
Atia: Nor shall you now.
Antony: That's a shame. It'll have to be Merula then. [Atia's slave Merula stares in shock] Come here, old girl, jump on!
Atia: She'd eat you alive!
Antony: I'm not rising from bed until I fuck someone.
Atia: Fine, fine. Merula, fetch that German slut from the kitchen.

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Mark Antony: [indicates outside] Listen. Why so quiet? A tyrant is dead. Surely the people should be happy? Where is the cheering throng at your door? Where are the joyful cries of "Liberty"?
Servillia: The people fear change. A sombre mood is only...natural.
Brutus: When they realise they are free from tyranny, they will be glad.
Mark Antony: [coldly] The people loved Caesar. And they will hate you for what you have done.

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Mark Antony: You boys play too rough for me. Knives in the Senate House? I didn't know you had it in you. No, I will serve out my term as consul and then return to the provinces, plough my fields and fuck my slaves like old Cincinnatus.

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[Servillia joins with Cassius and Cicero in urging Brutus to murder Antony]
Brutus: You too, mother?

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[After Antony orders the murderers of Caesar from Rome]
Cassius: You may wish as you will. We yet have all the Senate behind us and all the men of quality. [Furious, Antony storms over to Cassius]
Antony: [almost berserk with rage] And I have an angry mob, that will roast and eat your 'men of quality' in the ashes of the Senate House!

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Antony: You're not saying that these men paid me to put their names on here.
Cicero: Oh, no... I assume they paid Posca.

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Vorenus: I AM A SON OF HADES! I FUCK CONCORD IN HER ARSE!

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