Book Club Quotes

Sharon: If women our age were meant to have sex God wouldn't do what he does to our bodies.
Vivian: Speak for yourself.
Sharon: Well, that was not God, that was Dr. Nazaria

Movie: Book Club
Vivian: Emotional connection is highly overrated.

Movie: Book Club
Vivian: I don't care what society says about women our age, sex must not be taken off the table.

Movie: Book Club
Vivian: I don't sleep with people I like, you know that. I gave that up in the 90's.

Movie: Book Club
Sharon: To even be holding this book is embarrassing.

Movie: Book Club
Mitchell: [about flying]The safest way to travel.
Diane: Want to know why you think that?
Mitchell: Why?
Diane: Because you never net anybody who's been in a plane crash. And you want to know why?
Mitchell: Why?
Diane: Because they're all dead.

Movie: Book Club
Carol: [over the phone]How is life in Scottsdale?
Diane: Well, I don't know. I feel like I'm in an episode of The Walking Dead.

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Dr. Kapoor: [examining Sharon's cat]It sounds like we have a lethargic pussy on our hands.

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Dr. Kapoor: And what about diet?
Sharon: I've tried a few, but I like to eat. So whatever weight I take off, I put right back on, so it's useless. You're talking about the cat.
Dr. Kapoor: I am a... veterinarian.

Movie: Book Club
Sharon: Your husband just died.
Diane: Harry. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Oh, he was such a good man.
Vivian: I always thought that was the best thing that ever happened to you.
Sharon: Harry dying was the best thing that ever happened to her?
Vivian: Yeah, because now she can have sex with somebody who's not an accountant.

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Vivian: Someone make a bad wish?
Arthur: Oh, you should know I rescue wishes all over town.

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Sharon: [about Diane as she is about to go out with Mitchell]The last time she went on a date she got pregnant.

Movie: Book Club
Carol: Since when is sex not a good enough reason for a man?
Vivian: Honey, you're not dealing with a man, you're dealing with an older man. Different animal.

Movie: Book Club
Carol: So basically, I'm screwed. Or not screwed, as it were.

Movie: Book Club
Diane: We're not eighteen anymore.
Carol: No. We're sure not spring flowers.
Vivian: No. More like potpourri.

Movie: Book Club
Diane: Me? Oh, I don't remember.
Mitchell: Everybody remembers their first kiss.
Diane: How about I tell you about my best kiss?
Mitchell: Maybe that hasn't happened yet.

Movie: Book Club
[Sharon enters the house] Sharon: My son is engaged and my husband is in Maui with a tartlet named Cheryl.
Diane: Oh.
Sharon: I need a drink.
Carol: Your 'husband'?
Diane: You can't possibly still care about what Tom is doing.
Sharon: I don't care. But the guy gets seasick in a swimming pool. I mean, what the hell is he doing in Maui?
Vivian: Sounds like he's doing Cheryl in Maui.
Sharon: Oh, please. Who gets involved in a relationship at 67? I mean, what is the point?
Vivian: Oh, the point is to get laid. It's always the point.
Sharon: Don't make me sick.
Carol: Who still says, 'get laid'?
Diane: Who still has any interest?
Vivian: Ah, no, no, no, no, no. I am not gonna let us become those people.
Diane: What people are you talking about?
Vivian: You know what people. The people who stop living before they stop living.
Sharon: I haven't had sex since my divorce, and it's been the happiest 18 years of my life.
Vivian: What? That must be some kind of... record. I mean, what even happens to a vagina after 18 years?
Diane: You know, I think Werner Herzog did a documentary on that.
Carol: Yeah. It's called The Cave of Forgotten Dreams. [Vivian, Diane, and Carol laugh]
Sharon: Okay, will you stop it? Moving on. Let's talk about the book.
Vivian: Oh, God. The hiking book? Really?
Carol: Come on. I liked it! It's such a remarkable undertaking. Can you imagine?
Sharon: No, I cannot. I don't even like walking to my mailbox.
Carol: It's just an amazing story. I mean, so many layers. I wouldn't even know how to break it down.
Vivian: Well, I'll break it down for you. Sh

Movie: Book Club
Vivian: [grabs copies of Fifty Shades of Grey from bag]I would like to introduce you to Christian Grey.
Diane: Oh...
Sharon: Oh, no.
Vivian: [passes books to the other ladies]Why? It was a bestseller made into a movie.
Carol: Oh, and that is our theme this year.
Diane: Oh, wow.
Sharon: We are not reading this.
Vivian: It's my month! When it's your month, you can choose whatever boring, depressing book you want.
Sharon: I'm not sure this qualifies as a book.
Vivian: Well, 50 million people can't be wrong.
Sharon: To... to even be holding this book is embarrassing.
Vivian: Who's judging you? Your cat?
Carol: I do like the idea of a romance.
Sharon: We are too old.
Carol: But it does say right here 'for mature audiences'.
Diane: Yeah, that certainly sounds like us.
Sharon: We started this book club to stimulate our minds.
Vivian: Well, from what I hear, this book is quite stimulating.
Diane: Oh, God.
Vivian: [grabs her wine glass and gets up]So... come on! Let's toast to our new book.
Carol: All right. [the ladies get up to toast]
Vivian: Drink up. Hoist that glass. Happy reading, ladies.

Movie: Book Club