Babylon 5 Quotes

[Londo and G'Kar are about to be pulled out of a bombed-out transport tube]
Londo Mollari: There, you see? I'm going to live!
G'Kar: So it would seem. Well, it is an imperfect universe.
Londo: Bastard.
G'Kar: Monster.
Londo: Fanatic!
G'Kar: Murderer!
Londo: You are insane!
G'Kar: And that is why we'll win.
Londo: "Go be the ambassador to Babylon 5," they say. "It will be an easy assignment!" I hate my life.
G'Kar: So do I.
Londo: Shut up!

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Ivanova passes the alien questionnaire results to Corwin.]
Susan Ivanova: Check these figures again, make sure they came through the translator okay? I don't want to get killed because of a typo. It'd be embarrassing.

TV Show: Babylon 5
Ivanova: If I live through this job without completely losing my mind, it will be a miracle of biblical proportions!
David Corwin: Well, there goes my faith in the Almighty.

TV Show: Babylon 5
G'Kar: If I stay here, your families are in jeopardy. Is anything more important than their safety?
Narn: Yes. Their freedom. It's better to die in the cause of freedom than to live in comfort as a slave.

TV Show: Babylon 5
John Sheridan: Concentrate all you want—there's nowhere you can go!
Brother Theo: I'd expect a comment like that from someone with no clearly defined pattern of faith!
Sheridan: I believe in a little bit of everything. I'm…eclectic. Open-minded.
Brother Theo: Rudderless! Directionless! Cast adrift without compass on an ocean of ecclesiastical possibilities! Tossed by the winds, this way, that way!
Sheridan: Aw, I'm hearing a lot of talk, and you still haven't made a move.
Brother Theo: Your Ambassador Delenn has a wonderful phrase: "Faith…manages!" [Moves a chess piece.] Check…and I do believe…mate?
[Sheridan is initially dumbstruck, then Ivanova, who was watching, gets a call from C&C. After she's finished with the call: ]
Sheridan: You wanna tell me where you learned that little move?
Brother Theo: [smiling] Divine inspiration.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Ambassador Kosh meets with Ivanova in Docking Bay 13.]
Susan Ivanova: Ambassador. You wanted to see me?
Kosh: Yes. Formality. Ritual. You should be informed.
Ivanova: Informed of what?
Kosh: Returning.
[a surprise passenger emerges from Kosh's transport]
Lyta Alexander: Hello, Commander. I said I'd be back.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[in conference with Sheridan, Ivanova, and Franklin, Garibaldi offers his take on Lyta's return]
Michael Garibaldi: Nobody's ever been to the Vorlon Homeworld and back again. Yet she goes, comes back like she just took a trip to the corner store. And now she's working for Kosh. Is anybody else as creeped out about this as I am?
[the three others all raise their hands]

TV Show: Babylon 5
Londo Mollari: Lyta Alexander! As I live and breathe…
Lyta: I suggest you remove your hand, Ambassador, or you won't be doing either for very long.
. . .
Londo: Lyta, I understand the Psi Corps is looking for you. I would hate very much for them to find you.
Lyta: So would I. Because I'm not with the Corps anymore. That means I'm not bound by their rules! [She gets right in his face.] So if someone were to turn me in, I'd find him. And before they took me, I'd plant a nightmare deep in his mind where no one else could find or remove it. And that person would spend every night for the rest of his life…screaming!
[she turns around and walks away]
Londo: Fine! And keep your threats to yourself! [to himself] Nightmares. Hmph! The way my life has been going lately, who'd notice?

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Theo tends to the mortally wounded Edward after getting him down from the makeshift cross]
Brother Edward: Is there enough forgiveness for what I've done?
Brother Theo: Always, Edward, always. Take my hand. [Edward fumbles, and Theo takes his hand.] Through the mysteries of our redemption, may Almighty God release you from all punishments in this life and in the life to come. [Sheridan joins them, a look of dismay on his face as he realizes what's going on.] May He open to you the gates of Paradise and welcome you to everlasting joy. Father, look with compassion on Your servant Edward, who has trusted in Your promises. Welcome him to Your Kingdom in peace. By the authority which the Apostolic See has given me, I grant you a full pardon and remission of all your sins. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Zack complains about his uniform to an exasperated Garibaldi.]
Zack Allan: I look like I'm wearing a circus tent! Any minute now, a little teeny car with 16 clowns in it is gonna come flying out my butt!
[Garibaldi's link beeps.]
Michael Garibaldi: Garibaldi's Fashion Express. Go.

TV Show: Babylon 5
Draal: [addressing the command staff] Good afternoon, everyone! Captain, Delenn tells me that you're going to try contacting the First Ones. It is a magnificent idea—a daring and splendid idea! In doing so, you will see things no human has ever seen before! It will be…fun! Assuming you're not vaporized, dissected, or otherwise killed in an assortment of supremely horrible and painful ways! Exciting, isn't it?

TV Show: Babylon 5
Draal: I asked for Captain Sheridan!
Ivanova: Um…He's busy.
Draal: I don't like surprises!
Ivanova: Really? Love 'em, myself. To me, everything's a surprise! You're a surprise. This place is a surprise. You see this? [She holds up a finger.] Paper cut. Hurts like hell! Anybody else would be upset, but to me, it's just one more wonderful surprise! I mean, I even surprise myself sometimes! So I guess there's nothing wrong with me surprising you. Right?
[Draal's angry facade cracks, and he bursts out laughing.]
Draal: I like you! You're trouble!
Ivanova: [laughing in relief] Well, thank you! That's the nicest thing anybody's said about me in days!

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Over dinner, new Babylon 5 "political officer" Julie Musante asks Sheridan about "lurkers".]
John Sheridan: It's our version of the homeless. In many ways, we have the same problem Earth does.
Julie Musante: Mmm. Earth doesn't have homeless.
Sheridan: Excuse me?
Musante: We don't have the problem. Yes, there are some "displaced" people, here and there, but, uh… they've chosen to be in that position. They're either lazy, or they're criminal, or they're mentally unstable.
Sheridan: They can't get a job!
Musante: EarthGov has promised a job to anyone that wants one. So, if someone doesn't have a job, they must not want one.
. . .
[Musante runs down a list of all the social problems EarthGov has suddenly solved.]
Sheridan: And, uh w-when exactly did all this happen?
Musante: When we rewrote the dictionary.
. . .
Sheridan: You can't deal with the problems by pretending they don't exist.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[using the Great Machine, Ivanova "overhears" a conversation from the past]
Vice-President Clark: I have wanted Santiago dead for so long…I wasn't sure we could really pull it off. You're sure it's done?
Morden: EarthForce 1 will never return from Io. The power is now yours, Clark. Mister…President.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Ivanova holographically observes Sheridan being seduced by Julie Musante]
Susan Ivanova: Good luck, Captain. I think you're about to go where…everyone has gone before. [N]

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Ivanova and Marcus are trying to communicate with the "Walkers," the First Ones near Sigma 957]
Walkers: Vorlons Tavutna Chog!
Marcus Cole: I think you just hit a nerve. The Vorlons must owe them money or something.
Ivanova: At least it tells us that they understand our language. They're just not willing to speak to us in it.
Marcus: Who knew they were French? …Sorry.
. . .
[while waiting for a response from the Walkers]
Ivanova: Damn it! I really don't want to screw this up!
Marcus: Then don't. The Minbari taught me, "Claim victory in your heart and the universe will follow."
Ivanova: Fine. Great. Claim victory in your heart and up your…
[the Walkers reappear]
Walkers: ZOG!
Ivanova: "Zog"? What do you mean, zog? Zog what? Zog yes, zog no?
[the Walkers' ship turns to leave]
Marcus: It's leaving. My guess is "zog" means "no".
Ivanova: Like hell. I am not letting them leave here without saying yes.
Marcus: Really? And how do you propose stopping them? Perhaps a big red and white sign with the word "stop" on it? …I'll put a bucket on my head and pretend to be the ancient Vorlon god Boogee.
Ivanova: [gets an idea] That's it!
Marcus: Fine. I'll get a bucket.
Ivanova: No, I meant the Vorlons. Open a comm channel now!

TV Show: Babylon 5
G'Kar: I told you I could help. The Book of G'Quan. Read it. We'll talk afterwards.
Garibaldi: I don't read Narn.
G'Kar: [walking away from Garibaldi's quarters] Learn!

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Bester calls ahead to warn of his imminent arrival.]
Alfred Bester: I'm in pursuit of an individual who's a danger to your station, Earth, and the Psi Corps.
Susan Ivanova: Well, that's two legitimate things to worry about.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[The "conspiracy of light" worries about exposure by Bester.]
Michael Garibaldi: And after that, there are only two options. He turns us in, we're court-martialled, then shot for treason. Or we kill him, before he has a chance to tell anybody.
Stephen Franklin: I will not support murder. We can not kill him.
Ivanova: Can we wound him? Just a little?

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Bester loudly disclaims any prior knowledge of the Talia Winters debacle.]
Bester: On the other hand, we learned some interesting things about Miss Winters, in the course of her debriefing and dissec— that is, examination.
. . .
[Bester, agreeing to take a psi-surpressing drug, sneers at the command staff's distrust.]
Bester: I'm here to save your butts! Next time, show a little gratitude.
[He leaves.]
Franklin: On the other hand, maybe wounding him isn't such a bad idea after all.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Bester confronts Garibaldi about his insulting comments.]
Bester: My blood is the same color as yours, and what I do, I do to protect Earth, same as you. You don't like how I do it, that's your prerogative. But there are things going on out there that you know nothing about. Threats to the human race that no one ever hears about — because we stop them. There's dangers all around us! And whether you like us or not, we may be all that stands between you and the abyss.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Bester surprises Garibaldi with some psychological, not psychic, interrogation skills.]
Bester: Liars are always afraid that somebody's going to see through them. So I just provided him with a vehicle for his paranoia. Your captain's opinions notwithstanding, the badge and the uniform do have certain…advantages.
Garibaldi: Like intimidation?
Bester: Absolutely! Just like…your badge, and…your uniform.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Londo rephrases Vir's report on the Minbari to make them look bad, to Vir's horror.]
Vir Cotto: They are deeply spiritual people!
Londo Mollari: Yes, now that you can leave in. It always scares people.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Marcus meets with an informant in Downbelow]
Informant: Message from Ranger One on Minbar. He recommends our people go on a heightened state of alert and pull back from Earth space. Word is something screwy's going on back home.
Marcus Cole: This is not exactly a revelation.

TV Show: Babylon 5
[Marcus and Garbaldi argue over Lurkers]
Marcus: Well thank you, Mr. Garibaldi, one of the leading minds of the 14th century. "Have we no workhouses? Have we no prisons?" Mr. Marley here'd like to have a word with you! He's the fellow in the chains! Ignore the moans, it's just gas!
Michael Garibaldi: Don't you ever shut up?
Marcus: Not until I get what I want. Why? Do you think silent meditation would work better?
Garibaldi: Ivanova was right. You are a pain in the ass.

TV Show: Babylon 5
Michael Garibaldi: You know, I've been stuck in this tin can for three years. I haven't taken a vacation—okay, okay, it's my fault, I had the leave coming, I just didn't take it. And the pay sucks, I knew that when I signed on! And nobody said I'd survive the job! Now, I give you all that. But where in my contract does it say that I have to eat the same food for breakfast every day for three years?
John Sheridan: [matter-of-fact] Paragraph 47, Subsection 19, Clause 9A. You can find it in the index under S.U.A.E.I.
Garibaldi: S.U…A.E.I.?
Sheridan, Susan Ivanova: [in unison] Shut Up And Eat It.

TV Show: Babylon 5
Londo Mollari: "The Minbari put great emphasis on art, literature, and music." Yes, but say instead they are decadent people interested only in the pursuit of…of dubious pleasures. The dubious part is very important. It doesn't mean anything, but it scares people every time.

TV Show: Babylon 5
Vir Cotto: I thought the purpose of filing these reports was to provide accurate intelligence!
Mollari: Vir, intelligence has nothing to do with politics!

TV Show: Babylon 5
General Smits: Captain. I'm sure you've been following the news.
John Sheridan: Yes, sir. If I may ask, what's your opinion?
General Smits: My opinion has nothing to do with this, Captain, and neither does yours! Our job is to follow orders from the Commander in Chief and respect the chain of command! If you have different opinions, I suggest you file them in a deep dark place where nobody'll ever find them! Am I clear?

TV Show: Babylon 5
G'Kar: You must understand, Ta'Lon. I have had a revelation!
Ta'Lon: What kind of revelation?
G'Kar: A most profound and substantial one, Ta'Lon. The kind of revelation that transforms your mind, your soul, your heart—even your flesh—so that you are a new creature, reborn in the instant of understanding.
Ta'Lon: That was a stirring reply, Citizen G'Kar. Unfortunately, while all answers are replies, not all replies are answers. You did not answer the question that I asked. What do you understand now that you did not understand before?

TV Show: Babylon 5