3-South Quotes

Chef's Father: [at Chef's rehearsal dinner] Could I have everyone's attention, please? [crowd quiets]
Chef's Father: Tomorrow, my son is gonna get married to a beautiful lady. [sniffles]
Chef's Father: I'm very happy for them both. [begins to choke back tears]
Chef's Father: Ooh, there I go - I told myself I wasn't gonna cry.
Chef: It's okay, pop.
Chef's Mother: Thomas, you're gonna get me going now. [begins to tear up]
Chef's Father: I remember when Chef was just a three-year-old little man, he came runnin' into me with a big smile and his little chef's hat on, and he says to me, Poppa, poppa. I said, What do you need, Chef, my boy? He said, I need about tree-fitty.
Chef's Mother: Tree-fitty!
Chef's Father: Well, it was about that time I begin to get suspicious. I said, Chef, my boy, why do you need tree-fitty? He said, My imaginary friend Boo-Boo the dinosaur wants it. So I went to my son's room, and sure enough, there was that damn Loch Ness Monster!
Chef's Mother: Lord, it was scary!
Chef's Father: I said, Dammit, monster, you quit bugging my children, now. We work for our money in this house - we don't just give money away!

TV Show: 3-South
Movie Announcer: Rob Schneider is a wall street executive, with everything going for him. Only problem is, he's about to become... a carrot!
Rob Schneider: I'm a carrot!
Movie Announcer: It's twenty four "carrot" comedy! Rob Schneider is, A Carrot! Rated PG-13.

TV Show: 3-South
Preach: I'm just tryin' to do to white girls what the white man's been doin' to us for 400 years.
Crazy Legs: Yeah, what's that?
Preach: **** 'em.

TV Show: 3-South
Uncle Remus: Yes sir, that's the way with Br'er Rabbit, sure as I'm named Remus. About the time he get it stuck in his mind that there ain't nobody can outdo him, up somebody'd jump an' do him scan'lous. "What you laughin' 'bout?" says Br'er Fox, says he. An' Br'er Rabbit, he couldn't say nothin'. "Well, then," says Br'er Fox, says he, "I'll settle your hash right now!" And with that, he grab Br'er Rabbit by the tail and made for to dash 'im agin' the ground. But just then, Br'er Rabbit's tail snap off real short, an' he tuck through the cotton patch like the dogs was after 'im. An' from that day to this, the only tail that Br'er Rabbit's got to his name was a little ol' ball o' cotton.

TV Show: 3-South