Wedding Crashers Quotes

Father O'Neil: And now for our second reading I'd like to ask the bride's sister Gloria up to the lectern.
John Beckwith: 20 bucks First Corinthians.
Jeremy Grey: Double or nothing Colossians 3: 12.
Gloria Cleary: And now a reading from Paul's first letter to the Corinthians.

Movie: Wedding Crashers
John Beckwith: Are you going to give a toast?
Claire Cleary: Yes.
John Beckwith: Nervous?
Claire Cleary: A little bit, but I think this is good.
John Beckwith: You keep it in your cleavage.
Claire Cleary: Nowhere else to put it.
John Beckwith: I never thought my sister would meet someone who cared about what other people thought as much as she did until I met Craig?!
Claire Cleary: Yes, it's funny. It's funny because it's true. People like funny.
John Beckwith: I know, but the funny because it's true bit only works if the truth is a very small thing like everyone knows Jennifer likes to shop, ha ha ha. Honestly, I think you're better off going for something from the heart.
Claire Cleary: I think people are going to love this.
John Beckwith: I think you're going to hear crickets.
Claire Cleary: No.
John Beckwith: Sounds of silence.
Claire Cleary: Uh uh. I'm sticking to it.
John Beckwith: Ok, meet me at the back of the room. I'll be the guy waiting to say I told you so.

Movie: Wedding Crashers
Best Man: After my ninth stint in rehab, Craig - ah Craig, Craig was the only one who still believed in me. Been sober for eight months now.

Movie: Wedding Crashers
Jeremy Grey: I'm a cocksman! [gets glares from wedding guests]
John Beckwith: [to wedding guests] Tourette's.

Movie: Wedding Crashers
Jeremy Grey: I feel so tiny in your arms.
Guest at wedding: How tall are you?
Jeremy Grey: Six foot five, but I feel like I'm four feet.

Movie: Wedding Crashers
John Beckwith: [to a group of children at a wedding] Love doesn't exist, that's what I'm trying to tell you guys. And I'm not picking on love, 'cause I don't think friendship exists either.

Movie: Wedding Crashers