The Charmings Quotes

Cinderella: Fairy Godmother, I really want to go home.
Fairy Godmother: Oh, stop your whining and go look for your shoes!

Movie: The Charmings
Eric Charming: Luther, guess what I am getting Snow for our anniversary?
Luther: Wall to wall carpeting?
Eric Charming: No, we're getting a car!
Luther: All right! A new set of wheels.
Eric Charming: No not just the wheels, the whole thing. This is going to be the best anniversary ever! Right, Snow?
Snow White Charming: Oh Eric, what about what mother said?
Eric Charming: Honey, I would much rather get you a car than a muzzle.
Snow White Charming: No. About when it comes to cars, you don't know diddly.
Eric Charming: Oh, that. Honey don't worry. You know it's like making any decision, you get some good solid advice from someone you know you can trust.
Snow White Charming: Like who? [Snow, Eric and Luther then watch a commercial playing on their TV]
Honest Abe: [dressed as Abraham Lincoln] Need help buying a car? Then see me, Abraham Jones, AKA Honest Abe. The honest used car salesman. Don't be a slave to that old jalopy, let me emancipate you into a beautiful new used car. Take it from me, Honest Abe. Why, if I can't give you the best deal in town, I'll eat a log cabin!
Eric Charming: Honey, I think we found our man!

Movie: The Charmings
Queen Lillian White: [Lillian has been called in for an IRS audit, and is speaking to herself] They're not going to intimidate me, they're not going to intimidate me, they're not going to intimidate me.
IRS Agent: Next! [points to Lillian]
Queen Lillian White: You can't do anything to me, I've done nothing wrong.
IRS Agent: I hear that all the time. When it comes to tax fraud, everyone swears they're "lilly white."
Queen Lillian White: But I am Lilly White!
IRS Agent: Sure, sure, sure. Now sit down!
Queen Lillian White: I'm warning you, I'm a witch!
IRS Agent: Oh, yeah? So is my wife. Now, you say you're self employed. Doing what?
Queen Lillian White: Doing this. [she makes the lamp on the desk levitate]
IRS Agent: Not bad. But I saw that on a Bud Light commercial. [Lillian then zaps up a huge snake]
IRS Agent: Any other dependents?
Queen Lillian White: Tough room! [zaps the snake away]
IRS Agent: Now look, lady, I've been doing this for 22 years. I've seen it all, I've heard it all. Now where did you get the money?
Queen Lillian White: I tapped into the credit system through my magic mirror.
IRS Agent: Ok, I haven't heard it all.

Movie: The Charmings
Sally Miller: After the game these guys usually go out together, they drink beer, eat pizza, tell off color jokes, and have belching contests.
Snow White Charming: Why?
Sally Miller: It's what they call male bonding.
Snow White Charming: Well, Eric will just have to bond another time because he told me he's coming to my meeting.
Sally Miller: Honey, none of the husbands go to these things. What makes you think you're married to the only prince?
Snow White Charming: Trust me!

Movie: The Charmings
Snow White Charming: So, did you two go out for breakfast this morning?
Jack: No, we just came in from dinner last night.

Movie: The Charmings
The Mirror: They just want to see you happy.
Queen Lillian White: Then they should spontaneously combust!

Movie: The Charmings