The Ben Stiller Show Quotes

Ed Brimley: The little oat buds, they say, 'No, don't take me, I'm so tender.' But they do. They take 'em and they put 'em right in their hands and then the oat buds go, 'No no.' YES. We're taking BECAUSE you're tender. We're going to take you and CRUSH YOU. Crush you 'cuz you're DIRTY. You're dirty and you need to be punished.

TV Show: The Ben Stiller Show
Head Terrorist: Your coincidental appearance at every terrorist attack on Christmas Eve grows tiresome, Mister BAD BOY.
Bruce Willis: Yabba dabba doo, dabba dooby dabba dooby dabba.
Head Terrorist: Shut UP.

TV Show: The Ben Stiller Show
Police Officer in Charge: You just destroyed an entire deli section, mister.
Bruce Willis: What do you think I'm doing here, comparison shopping, huh?

TV Show: The Ben Stiller Show