Office Space Quotes
Bill Lumbergh: Milt, we're gonna need to go ahead and move you downstairs into storage B. We have some new people coming in, and we need all the space we can get. So if you could just go ahead and pack up your stuff and move it down there, that would be terrific, OK?
Milton Waddams: Excuse me, I believe you have my stapler...
Milton Waddams: Excuse me, I believe you have my stapler...
Movie: Office Space
Milton Waddams: [talking on the phone] And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire...
Movie: Office Space
Peter Gibbons: [discussing the possibility of going to prison] This isn't Riyadh. You know they're not gonna saw your hands off here, alright? The worst they would ever do is they would put you for a couple of months into a white-collar, minimum-security resort! ****, we should be so lucky! Do you know, they have conjugal visits there?
Samir: Really?
Peter Gibbons: Yes.
Michael Bolton: ****. I'm a free man and I haven't had a conjugal visit in six months.
Samir: Really?
Peter Gibbons: Yes.
Michael Bolton: ****. I'm a free man and I haven't had a conjugal visit in six months.
Movie: Office Space
Samir: No, not again. I... why does it say paper jam when there is no paper jam? I swear to God, one of these days, I just kick this piece of **** out the window.
Michael Bolton: You and me both, man. That thing is lucky I'm not armed.
Samir: Piece of ****.
Michael Bolton: You and me both, man. That thing is lucky I'm not armed.
Samir: Piece of ****.
Movie: Office Space
Tom Smykowski: Well-well look. I already told you: I deal with the god damn customers so the engineers don't have to. I have people skills; I am good at dealing with people. Can't you understand that? What the hell is wrong with you people?
Movie: Office Space