My Favorite Martian Quotes

Coleye: This is similar to the Martian incident of 1963.
Armitan: Careful, Stupid. Not only is that incident classified, it never happened!

TV Show: My Favorite Martian
Uncle Martin: Wake up, Tim. There's a big day ahead of us.
Tim O'Hara: It's still night time. You've been asleep for 30 seconds.
Uncle Martin: 30 seconds? I *was* tired!

TV Show: My Favorite Martian
Uncle Martin: After all as a very wise man once told me, the chicken is not infrequently the true dove of peace.

TV Show: My Favorite Martian
Uncle Martin: [reading newspaper] Hmp.
Tim O'Hara: [Looking up from his bank statement] What?
Uncle Martin: I'm sorry, did you say something?
Tim O'Hara: No.
Uncle Martin: I distinctly heard you say "what."
Tim O'Hara: Oh, that's because you said "hmp."
Uncle Martin: Did I?
Tim O'Hara: [Goes back to bank statement]
Uncle Martin: Hmp. [Goes back to newspaper]
Tim O'Hara: There! You see! You did it again!
Uncle Martin: Tim, did you see this article? Your goverenment is about to spend two billion dollars on a space program that can't possibly work.
Tim O'Hara: Uncle Martin, here I've got my friendly bank statement. Right here. And over here I've got my enemy checkbook. And between the two, a penny is lost. And the bank wants me to find it! Yes, Abe Lincoln, lost in a mayasma of mathematics and figures. And you speak to me about two billion dollars? Please Uncle Martin, can we keep it quiet?
Uncle Martin: [Going back to newspaper] Hmp.

TV Show: My Favorite Martian