Fight Club Quotes

Marla Singer : There are things about you that I like. You're smart, you're funny, you're... spectacular in bed... But you're intolerable! You have very serious emotional problems. Deep seated problems for which you should seek professional help.
Narrator : I know, and I'm sorry...
Marla Singer : Yeah, you're sorry, I'm sorry, everybody's sorry, but... I can't do this anymore. I can't. And I won't. I'm gone.

Movie: Fight Club
Tyler Durden : Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : I am Jack's cold sweat.

Movie: Fight Club
[ Holding up a wad of cash ]
Marla Singer : You're not getting this back. I consider it asshole tax.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : If I did have a tumor, I'd name it Marla.

Movie: Fight Club
[ meeting aboard an airliner ]
Narrator : What do you do for a living?
Tyler Durden : Why? So you can pretend like you're interested?

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : He was *the* guerilla terrorist in the food service industry. [ the Narrator looks at Tyler, who's urinating in a pot ]
Tyler Durden : Do not watch. I cannot go when you watch.
Narrator : Apart from seasoning the lobster bisque, he farted on the meringue, sneezed on braised endive, and as for the cream of mushroom soup, well...
Tyler Durden : [ snickers ] Go ahead. Tell 'em.
Narrator : ...you get the idea.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : I am Jack's raging bile duct.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : Oh, yeah, Chloe... Chloe looked the way Meryl Streep's skeleton would look if you made it smile and walk around the party being extra nice to everybody.
Chloe : Well, I'm still here. But I don't know for how long. That's as much certainty as anyone can give me. But I've got some good news: I no longer have any fear of death. But... I am in a pretty lonely place. No one will have sex with me. I'm so close to the end, and all I want is to get laid for the last time. I have pornographic movies in my apartment, and lubricants, and amyl nitrite... [ the group leader takes the mic ]
Group Leader : Thank you, Chloe... everyone, let's thank Chloe.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : A guy who came to Fight Club for the first time, his ass was a wad of cookie dough. After a few weeks, he was carved out of wood.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : I ran. I ran until my muscles burned and my veins pumped battery acid. Then I ran some more.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : After fighting, everything else in your life got the volume turned down.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : If you wake up at a different time in a different place, could you wake up as a different person?

Movie: Fight Club
Tyler Durden : Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing. Like the first monkey shot into space.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : And then, something happened. I let go. Lost in oblivion. Dark and silent and complete. I found freedom. Losing all hope was freedom.

Movie: Fight Club
Tyler Durden : Do you know what a duvet is?
Narrator : It's a comforter...
Tyler Durden : It's a blanket. Just a blanket. Now why do guys like you and me know what a duvet is? Is this essential to our survival, in the hunter-gatherer sense of the word? No. What are we then?
Narrator : ...Consumers?
Tyler Durden : Right. We are consumers. We're the bi-products of a lifestyle obsession.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : [ while brutally beating Angel Face ] I felt like putting a bullet between the eyes of every Panda that wouldn't screw to save its species. I wanted to open the dump valves on oil tankers and smother all the French beaches I'd never see. I wanted to breathe smoke.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : [ reading ] I am Jack's colon.
Tyler Durden : I get cancer, I kill Jack.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : Everywhere I travel, tiny life. Single-serving sugar, single-serving cream, single pat of butter. The microwave Cordon Bleu hobby kit. Shampoo-conditioner combos, sample-packaged mouthwash, tiny bars of soap. The people I meet on each flight? They're single-serving friends.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : I'll tell you: we'll split up the week, okay? You take lymphoma, and tuberculosis...
Marla Singer : You take tuberculosis. My smoking doesn't go over at all.
Narrator : Okay, good, fine. Testicular cancer should be no contest, I think.
Marla Singer : Well, technically, I have more of a right to be there than you. You still have your balls.
Narrator : You're kidding.
Marla Singer : I don't know... am I?
Narrator : No, no! What do you want?
Marla Singer : I'll take the parasites.
Narrator : You can't have both the parasites, but while you take the blood parasites...
Marla Singer : I want brain parasites.
Narrator : I'll take the blood parasites. But I'm gonna take the organic brain dementia, okay?
Marla Singer : I want that.
Narrator : You can't have the whole brain, that's...
Marla Singer : So far you have four, I only have two!
Narrator : Okay. Take both the parasites. They're yours. Now we both have three...

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : I want bowel cancer.

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Narrator : I am Jack's complete lack of surprise.

Movie: Fight Club
Tyler Durden : It could be worse. A woman could cut off your penis while you're sleeping and toss it out the window of a moving car.
Narrator : There's always that.

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[ the narrator pulls a loose tooth out of his mouth ]
Narrator : Fuck.
Tyler Durden : Hey, even the Mona Lisa's falling apart.

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[ about attending support groups for diseases she doesn't have ]
Marla Singer : It's cheaper than a movie, and there's free coffee.

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Narrator : Look, nobody takes this more seriously than me. That condo was my life, okay? I loved every stick of furniture in that place. That was not just a bunch of stuff that got destroyed, it was ME! [ voice-over ]
Narrator : I'd like to thank the Academy...

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : I am Jack's wasted life.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : I am Jack's inflamed sense of rejection.

Movie: Fight Club
Tyler Durden : Fuck what you know. You need to forget about what you know, that's your problem. Forget about what you think you know about life, about friendship, and especially about you and me.

Movie: Fight Club
Narrator : I am Jack's broken heart.

Movie: Fight Club