Club Dread Quotes

Coconut Pete: I thought it was time to bring in the pro.
Sam, The Fun Police: Hank?
Coconut Pete: Yes, Hank. The head of security on all my tours.
Jenny: So, what? He keeps aging hippies from stealing the bong out of your tour bus?
Coconut Pete: It just so happens Hank used to be a federal agent. Yes, that's right. Headed a FBI task force on serial killers. Single-handedly caught the Minneapolis Mangler.
Lars: Who's the Minneapolis Mangler?
Hank: Exactly.
Dave: Pete, you are aware that I've personally served this guy twenty beers a day for the last ten years, right?
Hank: [shows a nasty scar on his side] Hey, I was in Nicaragua, junior! When you can stuff your intestines back in your pockets and walk twenty clicks to an aid station after a knife fight with guerilla drug lords, then you talk to me!

Movie: Club Dread
Juan: [after "interrogating" Penelope by having passionate sex] I may need a few more hours to pump her for information.

Movie: Club Dread
Coconut Pete: [re: Jimmy Buffet] Son-of-a-son-of-a-*****!

Movie: Club Dread
Jenny: [about Penelope] Who is she?
Juan: She's my girlfriend.

Movie: Club Dread
Juan: Yu and Hank are dead!
Coconut Pete: ...What did we do?
Juan: No! Yu and Hank are ****ing dead!
Coconut Pete: Is that a threat?

Movie: Club Dread
Sam, The Fun Police: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Coconut Pete's Pleasure Island. You have the right to fun. If you choose not to have fun, fun will be provided for you.

Movie: Club Dread