Brats Quotes

Lisa: Are you all gangsters?

Movie: Brats
Miss Frog: And remember, a male graduate of a college is an alumnus. If someone tries to tell you he's an alumni of that college, he is the dumbest mother****er on the planet.

Movie: Brats
Porky Pig: And w-w-what's your name?

Baby Butch: Butch.

Porky Pig: B-B-B-Butch? He-he-he-he.

Baby Butch: Not B-B-B-B-B-B-Butch - He-he-he-he. Just plain Butch!

Movie: Brats
Porky Pig: And w-w-what's your name?

Baby Butch: Butch.

Porky Pig: B-B-B-Butch? He-he-he-he.

Baby Butch: Not B-B-B-B-B-B-Butch - He-he-he-he. Just plain Butch!

Movie: Brats
Woman: What's the matter? Didn't you use the book?

Porky Pig: Yeah, b-b-b-but it didn't work.

Woman: Maybe you didn't use it right.
[spanks Butch with book]

Woman: It always works for me.

Movie: Brats
Woman: You wanna help the United Nations, don't ya? You want those ships and planes roll off the assembly line, don't ya? You want those Nazis and Japs bombed off the earth, don't ya?

Porky Pig: I h-hate Hitl-Hitl-Shicklegruber and Toj-Toj...

Woman: Then mind my kid. Here, this might help you.
[Gives Porky a book]

Porky Pig: [Reads cover] Ch-Ch-Child Psychology.

Woman: Now I can go weld planes. We gotta have planes, you know.
[acts like a plane taking off, then flies off like one]

Porky Pig: S-Say, she's a character.

Movie: Brats
Woman: You wanna help the United Nations, don't ya? You want those ships and planes roll off the assembly line, don't ya? You want those Nazis and Japs bombed off the earth, don't ya?

Porky Pig: I h-hate Hitl-Hitl-Shicklegruber and Toj-Toj...

Woman: Then mind my kid. Here, this might help you.
[Gives Porky a book]

Porky Pig: [Reads cover] Ch-Ch-Child Psychology.

Woman: Now I can go weld planes. We gotta have planes, you know.
[acts like a plane taking off, then flies off like one]

Porky Pig: S-Say, she's a character.

Movie: Brats
Danila: [the gangsters are about to kill the last witness of a double murder. Danila stands in front of the witness] Wait, I'll do it myself. Give me that.
[Snatches a M1911A1 from one of the gangsters]

Danila: Wow,a genuine Colt!
[proceeds to shoot both gangsters]

Danila: .

Movie: Brats
Stan Sr.: If you must make a noise, make it quietly.

Ollie Sr.: Make a noise quietly. Hmph!

Movie: Brats
Stan Sr.: Remember the old adage: You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.

Movie: Brats
Danila: [Two chechens in tram refuse to pay the fare and act arrogantly. Danila takes out his revolver, walks up to chechens and points barrel at them] Pay the fine!

Chechen in tram car: Brother! Please don't kill me, bro! Take my money, take everyting, just don't kill me!
[tries to give his wallet to Danila]

Danila: You're NOT my brother, black-assed scum!

Movie: Brats
Danila: [two chechens in tram refuse to pay the fare and act arrogantly. Danila takes out his revolver, walks up to chechens and points barrel at them] Pay the fine!

Chechen in tram car: Brother! Please don't kill me, bro! Take my money, take everything, just don't kill me!
[tries to give his wallet to Danila]

Danila: You're *not* my brother, black-assed scum!

Movie: Brats
Lisa: [Danila is sleeping. Lisa touches Danila's wound. He wakes up] Oh, I'm sorry!
[Danila pushes her down on the bed and pulls down her panties]

Lisa: No!

Danila: Oh, come on!

Movie: Brats
Narrator: So let us realize that out of this nation's crisis has arisen a woman. A new woman. A superwoman, who has overcome all problems, challenges and obstacles, except one: where the heck to put the kids while she's working?

Woman: You ain't kiddin', brother! I'm a beat pigeon. I can't find no one to mind my kid. The situation is supernatural. I don't wanna be an absentee, but what's a girl to do? I just gotta find someone to mind my Percy.

Movie: Brats
Narrator: So let us realize that out of this nation's crisis has arisen a woman. A new woman. A superwoman, who has overcome all problems, challenges and obstacles, except one: where the heck to put the kids while she's working?

Woman: You ain't kiddin', brother! I'm a beat pigeon. I can't find no one to mind my kid. The situation is supernatural. I don't wanna be an absentee, but what's a girl to do? I just gotta find someone to mind my Percy.

Movie: Brats
Ollie Sr.: [singing softly] Go to sleep, my ba-a-a-by, my ba-a-a-by, my ba...

Stan Sr.: [interrupting loudly] MY BA-A-ABY!
[kids wake up with a shocked start]

Movie: Brats
Ollie Sr.: What's all this racket about?

Ollie Jr.: [in a plaintive whiny "poor me" tone of voice] He hit me!

Stan Jr.: I did not! He hit m-
[taking his hand out of the covers to try to point to Ollie Jr., then realizing with extreme chagrin that he still has the boxing glove on. He hastily slips his hand out of the glove and then half-heartedly points a bare finger at Ollie Jr., knowing that his complaint/accusation won't hold much water now that the fathers have seen the boxing glove and thus will suspect that Stan had been doing some hitting himself]

Stan Jr.: - He...

Movie: Brats
Stan Sr.: [reaching out to stop Ollie from using his pool cue] My break!

Ollie Sr.: It's MY break!

Stan Sr.: [indignantly] It's MY break!
[points irritably]

Stan Sr.: You went in the pocket there -...

Ollie Sr.: [bonks Stan over the head with his pool cue to shut him up, then leans over the pool table with the cuestick to hit the cueball again. Stan quickly reaches out and picks up the cueball to keep Ollie from hitting it, but Ollie doesn't see Stan's action in time, and thrusts the cuestick forward where the ball had been, skinning off a strip of the pool table's green felt playing surface]

Movie: Brats
Ticket checker: Your... your visa expired years ago.

Movie: Brats
Woman: What's the matter? Didn't you use the book?

Porky Pig: Yeah, b-b-b-but it didn't work.

Woman: Maybe you didn't use it right.
[spanks Butch with book]

Woman: It always works for me.

Movie: Brats
Danila: [the gangsters are about to kill the last witness of a double murder. Danila stands in front of the witness] Wait, I'll do it myself. Give me that.
[Snatches a M1911A1 from one of the gangsters]

Danila: Wow,a genuine Colt!
[proceeds to shoot both gangsters]

Danila: .

Movie: Brats
Danila: [Two chechens in tram refuse to pay the fare and act arrogantly. Danila takes out his revolver, walks up to chechens and points barrel at them] Pay the fine!
Chechen in tram car: Brother! Please don't kill me, bro! Take my money, take everyting, just don't kill me! [tries to give his wallet to Danila]
Danila: You're NOT my brother, black-assed scum!

Movie: Brats
Lisa: [Danila is sleeping. Lisa touches Danila's wound. He wakes up] Oh, I'm sorry!
[Danila pushes her down on the bed and pulls down her panties]

Lisa: No!

Danila: Oh, come on!

Movie: Brats
Lisa: Are you all gangsters?

Dasha: No, we are Russians!

Movie: Brats
Ollie Jr.: [after being warned for the last time to be quiet] Let's play hide and seek!

Stan Jr.: You're it.

Ollie Jr.: No, you're it!

Stan Jr.: No, you're it!

Ollie Jr.: No, you're it!

Stan Jr.: [crying loudly] I don't want to be it! WAH!
[throws a tantrum]

Movie: Brats
Ollie Sr.: That's it. If you brats don't be quiet you'll have to go to bed.

Stan Sr.: Yes we'll have to go to bed.

Ollie Sr.: Not we, The kids.

Movie: Brats
Ollie Jr.: [after being warned for the last time to be quiet] Let's play hide and seek!

Stan Jr.: You're it.

Ollie Jr.: No, you're it!

Stan Jr.: No, you're it!

Ollie Jr.: No, you're it!

Stan Jr.: [crying loudly] I don't want to be it! WAH!
[throws a tantrum]

Movie: Brats
Ollie Sr.: Boys will be boys.

Stan Sr.: Blood is thicker than water.

Ollie Sr.: Blood's thicker than water. Hmph!

Movie: Brats
Ollie Sr.: If you brats don't get to bed, I'll break your necks!

Stan Sr.: Shh. Don't talk to them like that. Treat them with kindness. You'll get more out of them. Remember the old adage, you can lead a horse to water but a pencil must be lead.

Movie: Brats
Ollie Sr.: [in an irritable bossy tone of voice] Shoot THAT ball!

Movie: Brats