Back to School Quotes

Chas: [limping off the diving board] I have got a really bad cramp. I've been having really bad cramps all week.
Jason Melon: It's probably menstrual.
Chas: Screw you, Melon!

Movie: Back to School
Chas: [limping off the diving board] I have got a really bad cramp. I've been having really bad cramps all week.
Jason Melon: It's probably menstrual.
Chas: Screw you, Melon!

Movie: Back to School
Diane: Hello, Philip.
Dr. Phillip Barbay: What did he want?
Diane: Oh! What do ALL men want?
Dr. Phillip Barbay: [wryly] He wants you to dress up as Wonder Woman? Tie him up with a golden lariat and force him to tell the truth?
Diane: No, just dinner, Philip.
Diane: [laughs] Are you jealous of Thornton Melon?
Dr. Phillip Barbay: Certainly not.

Movie: Back to School
Diane: How would you characterize The Great Gatsby?
Thornton Melon: He was... uh... great!

Movie: Back to School
Thornton Melon: Boy, what a great-looking place. When I used to dream about going to college, this is the way I always pictured it.
Jason Melon: Wait a minute. When did you dream about going to college?
Thornton Melon: When I used to fall asleep in high school.

Movie: Back to School
Thornton Melon: You know, at my highschool the football team was so tough, first they'd take out the quarterback, they went after his family

Movie: Back to School