The 59th Annual Academy Awards Quotes

Herself - Presenter: Best Original Score: Oh, my God, I got here! I cannot tell you what I have been through, getting ready for this star-studded event! I had my hair tortured by Emilio! I had by body pummeled by Ambrosia! I had my nails filed by Philippe! I have been worked over by more aliens than Sigourney Weaver! Oh, my God, but I *made* it! Now I know you're all on the edge of your seats, dying to know who I'm going to trash this evening. I hate to tell you this, but there is no trashing to be done in this category. These nominees are absolutely un-besmirchable! Nevertheless I am honored to present this award because, as you may have heard, I love this category: Scoring! Yes, that's right! There is a cheap and vulgar joke to be made for this category, and if I were half as cheap as I look in this dress, I would tell it! But I hardly think that appropriate for an occasion as pompous as this one. So we'll save the cheap shots for the People's Choice Awards.

TV Show: The 59th Annual Academy Awards