Slow Learners Quotes

Joyce Lowry: If you have trouble coming out, let us come in!

Movie: Slow Learners
[First lines] Jeff Lowry: You look exactly like your profile pic.
Laura: [confused if it's a compliment]Thankyou.

Movie: Slow Learners
Laura: That's a lot of onions.
Jeff Lowry: Yeah. I like onions. Make you cry.

Movie: Slow Learners
Jeff Lowry: What is it about me that is like... that you... m... m... makes you not wanna sit here?
Laura: Honestly?
Jeff Lowry: Yeah.
Laura: [Exhales heavily in relaxation]It's like everything, starting with your face first, just like the expression on it is really bad. You sort of look like... you're smelling something that doesn't smell good or like you're squinting even though you're wearing glasses. Like, your eyes don't work. You kinda look like a lesbian newscaster 'cause you're effeminate but not in like a good way. It's almost insulting to women, the way you're effeminate 'cause like you're not androgynous. You're just like soft and doughy. You don't look like you have bones under your body at all. You're just sort of like an old baby, you know. You just seem very uncomfortable... you know, like a little bit... like you're apologizing for your existence.

Movie: Slow Learners
Anne Martin: It's not like a spiritual kind of cleansing thing which is abstinence. It's more just like... oh gosh, it has, is it March already?

Movie: Slow Learners
Anne Martin: Apparently, I'm clinically abstinent.
Jeff Lowry: Clinically abstinent?
Anne Martin: Yeah. It's a thing and I've got it.
Jeff Lowry: I've never heard anybody diagnosed with that.
Anne Martin: Hi!

Movie: Slow Learners
Anne Martin: I hate calling other women bitches.
Julia: Yeah, it's not good.
Anne Martin: It's, it's like...
Julia: It's offensive and aggressive.
Anne Martin: It's anti-feminist, it's gender specific violence.
Julia: Yeah.
Anne Martin: And it's just... it's not for me.
Julia: So let's cut bitch out maybe.
Anne Martin: Alright, cock chugger.

Movie: Slow Learners
Anne Martin: Oh! Principal Miller?
Principal Miller: Oh shit! You're not Enrique's wife.
Anne Martin: [nods her head]No. [Principal Miller walks awkwardly to her car]
Anne Martin: I'm just gonna... pretend that didn't happen. Oh boy!

Movie: Slow Learners
Max: [to Jeff]What you and Ann could have, that could be the real thing. Me and Beth, I mean... come on. As soon as we're done, I'm moving on.
Beth: [from other side of the door]I heard that.
Max: You okay?
Beth: Yeah, I'm fine... with it.
Max: She's fine.

Movie: Slow Learners
Anne Martin: Did you get a bike?
Jeff Lowry: Oh no. I thought it would look cool if I was standing in front of it.

Movie: Slow Learners