Salute Your Shorts Quotes

Michael Stein: Sponge! This is Ug's private stereo, are you sure everything is hooked up all right?
Sponge Harris: My IQ is in the top 99th percentile.
Michael Stein: Look, sponge if anything happens to Ug's equipment, I'm dead.
Sponge Harris: Just... just turn it on.
Michael Stein: You said everything was going to be all right! What happened?
Sponge Harris: I was wrong. It's little things like this that keep me out of the 100th percentile.

TV Show: Salute Your Shorts
Sponge Harris: You should have never come to this camp.
Michael Stein: Why?
Sponge Harris: Because the food bites, bugs bite, activities bite, everything bites!

TV Show: Salute Your Shorts
Ug: I did it! I did it!
Dina Alexander: What?
Ug: I finally out-negotiated Dr. Kahn.
Telly: What happened?
Ug: He was going to give me one night off every month, but I talked him into giving me one night off every four weeks.
Dina Alexander: Way to play hardball, Ug.

TV Show: Salute Your Shorts
Z.Z.: I made a locket out of a milk carton and put Michael's picture in it that way he'll always be by near heart.
Dina Alexander: It's only been four hours since he's been gone. Camp isn't the same.
Sponge Harris: Actually four hours and seven minutes.
Donkeylips: I don't miss him that much. It's like the change of season; life goes on.

TV Show: Salute Your Shorts
[Sponge and Donkey Lips sit and watch Ronny and Telly fight over a piece of paper in the lake]
Donkeylips: Looks like Budnick has a crush on Dina.
Sponge Harris: And ZZ has a crush on Budnick.
Donkeylips: And I think Telly is actually crushing Pinsky.
Sponge Harris: But no-one has a crush on us.
Donkeylips: Do you think it is going to be that way our whole lives?
Sponge Harris: Nah, in a few years woman will love us for our minds and it won't matter if we're cool.
Donkeylips: I can't wait! Hey lets go rub some sticks together and see if we can start a fire.

TV Show: Salute Your Shorts
[the campers realises that Budnick has transformed into the Counselor of Hell, not the free loving counselor who promised to let them run amuck]
Dina Alexander: We have created a monster.
Sponge Harris: Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Aristotle said that.
Ronnie Pinsky: Budnick is a swine. Let's pound him. Pinsky said that.
Bobby Budnick: Quit your yapping, no breaks. [sleeps]
Sponge Harris: We have to find some way to get him him back.
Dina Alexander: Why don't we put meat in his toothpaste?
Ronnie Pinsky: No good. There's no telling when he's going to brush his teeth.
Telly Radford: I still say pounding him is a good idea.
Kevin 'Ug' Lee: [puts bucket down] So you want to get Budnick, huh? Here's how we do it. When he pulls rank, we pull a prank. When he sends us to the Pool, we send him to the Latrine. That the Anawanna way. [Ug and the rest of the campers plot their revenge prank against Budnick]

TV Show: Salute Your Shorts