Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In Quotes

Big Al: I just gave Tiny Tim a nude statue with a clock in its stomach as a wedding present. The clock doesn't work, but Tiny'll never find out. He's too embarrassed to wind it.

TV Show: Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In
Dan Rowan: What do you know about pills?
Dan Rowan: I had an iron deficiency.
Dan Rowan: You had and iron deficiency?
Dan Rowan: I had to take iron shots.
Dan Rowan: How did work?
Dan Rowan: Pretty good. I can do anything I want as long as I'm facing the north pole.

TV Show: Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In
Dan Rowan: Teresa, did you know that the government has spent, in the past two years, 28 million dollars renting buildings in Vietnam?
Teresa Graves: My goodness! Listen, if we just stop paying the rent, maybe we can get evicted.

TV Show: Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In
Dan Rowan: [as the News of the Future anchor] Item: Washington, DC, 1988. President Ronald Reagan today denied once again that he is a candidate for the office of Governor of California.

TV Show: Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In
Dick Martin: You bet your sweet bippy.

TV Show: Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In
Lily Tomlin: You know the President felt we couldn't afford the money for a Health and Education program, so he vetoed the bill. As simple as A-B-M.

TV Show: Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In