Opposite Sex Quotes

[Trying to calm Randy down]
Dedee: Randy, be Christlike!

TV Show: Opposite Sex
Dedee: [as Dedee is walking away from Bill's, looking for a ride and stopping under a tree, she narrates: ] Seems like everybody's having sex but me. Good for them. It's not that I'm against sex. I mean, it was clever of God or evolution or whatever to hook the survival of the species to it because we're gonna screw around no what. It was a smarter thing to pick than say... the instinct to share your toys or return phone calls. We'd have died out like eons ago. But on the minus side, god... all the *attachment* that goes with it. It's like this net. Sex always ends in kids or disease, or like, you know, relationships. That's exactly what I don't want. I want the opposite of all that. Because it's not worth it, not really, is it? When you think about it?
Dedee: [cut to montage of memories of heart-warming relationship scenes with Tom, Bill, and Lucia together, then with other cast characters, and ending with one of Dedee and Randy together back in Louisiana. Back to Dedee smoking with narration continuing: ] OK, so maybe I'm wrong. Maybe it's not all shit. Maybe...
Dedee: God damn it.
Dedee: [Frustrated, she sits down on street curb, smoking and thinking. She continues narrating: ] I thought the whole idea was I know what happens next. I'll tell you one thing... I'm not gonna go back to Bill's house and be this big changed person for you. I told you right off I don't grow a heart of gold. And if I do, which is, like, *so unlikely*... give me a break and don't make me do it in front of you. Come on, guys, go, okay?
Dedee: [looking at the camera angrily and violently shooing us away with her left hand] GO!
Dedee: [fade to black and narration continues: ] I'll give you this much, though... I never was the same again after that summer. [credits roll]

TV Show: Opposite Sex
Jed Perry: I do not want to indecorously romp with anyone.

TV Show: Opposite Sex
Jed Perry: Did she give you a reason why she dumped you?
Rob Perry: Well, it's complicated. I'm not sure you'd understand.
Jed Perry: Try me.
Rob Perry: I slept with her best friend.

TV Show: Opposite Sex
Lucia: I don't know how you do it. You're always so nice and so calm. Tom was like that too. It's depressing.
Bill Truitt: You're nice.
Lucia: That's how I always felt around you too, like the Baroness in The Sound of Music. While everybody's just singing and climbing an Alp. And I just wanna STUFF THAT GUITAR UP THAT NUN'S ASS! And... ugh!

TV Show: Opposite Sex