Longhorns Quotes
Kevin: D'you know it's, uh, Wear-Jeans-If-You're-Gay Day?
Cesar: Of course. I organized it.
Kevin: [dropping smile]Oh... shit. That... That's cool.
Cesar: Of course. I organized it.
Kevin: [dropping smile]Oh... shit. That... That's cool.
Movie: Longhorns
Cesar: [as Kevin prepares to take a shower]Should I close my eyes?
Kevin: [slipping off his underwear with a smile]Too late.
Kevin: [slipping off his underwear with a smile]Too late.
Movie: Longhorns
Justin: [barging in]Hey, cum-guzler!
Kevin: Jesus! You heard of knockin'?
Justin: Woo, who put a bug up your ass?
Kevin: Jesus! You heard of knockin'?
Justin: Woo, who put a bug up your ass?
Movie: Longhorns
Kevin: If dumb were dirty, you'd cover an acre.
Justin: Well, if brains was dynamite you couldn't blow your nose.
Justin: Well, if brains was dynamite you couldn't blow your nose.
Movie: Longhorns
Kevin: [voiceover while masturbating]That Cesar's probably lurkin' at some rest stop this very minute or sniffin' jock straps at the gym. What that poor boy must be going through.
Movie: Longhorns
Cesar: And what are you?
Kevin: Just yer average good-ole-boy.
Cesar: Who could charm the skin off a rattlesnake.
Kevin: Just yer average good-ole-boy.
Cesar: Who could charm the skin off a rattlesnake.
Movie: Longhorns
Cesar: You're hotter than a billy-goat in a pepper patch.
Kevin: You're makin' fun of me.
Cesar: Never.
Kevin: You're makin' fun of me.
Cesar: Never.
Movie: Longhorns
Kevin: [voiceover]Wow-wee! If he were a girl, I'd be ridin' a gravy train with biscuit wheels.
Movie: Longhorns
Steve: I don't know what it is, Kevin. Somethin' about you brings out my frisky side.
Movie: Longhorns
Danny: Why do you keep doin' this stuff behind my back, 'n not includin' me?
Steve: Well... because you're repressed.
Steve: Well... because you're repressed.
Movie: Longhorns
Cesar: Will you marry me?
Marsha: Well, I would.
Marsha: But you're a total fag and I'm a total bitch.
Marsha: We just couldn't get our children into the good schools.
Marsha: Well, I would.
Marsha: But you're a total fag and I'm a total bitch.
Marsha: We just couldn't get our children into the good schools.
Movie: Longhorns