Guy Quotes
LaDonne: Hi, gorgeous man!
Stewie Griffin: Oh, you... Must I lock up your tongue with the rest of the silver?
LaDonne: Stewie, this is Jeremy!
Jeremy: Hey, little man! [pats him on the head]
Jeremy: So you're the guy who's been trying to steal my girlfriend!
Stewie Griffin: Wha- you- Girlfriend? Oh, what kind of sick, twisted game are you playing at?
LaDonne: Stewie sounds a little cranky. I'll put him to bed. [picks him up]
Stewie Griffin: [takes Jeremy's hat as he's carried away] Ha! I've got your hat! Take that, Hatless! Now go back to the quad and resume your hacky-sack tournee! I'm not going to lie down for some frat-boy bastard with his damn Teva sandals and his Skoal bandits and his Abercrombie & Fitch long-sleeved, open-stitch, crew-neck Henley smoking his sticky-buds out of a soda can while watching his favorite downloaded "Simpsons" episodes every night! Yes, we all love "Mr. Plow." Oh, you've got the song memorized, do you? [shouts]
Stewie Griffin: So does everyone else! That is *exactly* the kind of idiot you see at Taco Bell at one in the morning! The guy who just whiffed his way down the bar-skank ladder!
Stewie Griffin: Oh, you... Must I lock up your tongue with the rest of the silver?
LaDonne: Stewie, this is Jeremy!
Jeremy: Hey, little man! [pats him on the head]
Jeremy: So you're the guy who's been trying to steal my girlfriend!
Stewie Griffin: Wha- you- Girlfriend? Oh, what kind of sick, twisted game are you playing at?
LaDonne: Stewie sounds a little cranky. I'll put him to bed. [picks him up]
Stewie Griffin: [takes Jeremy's hat as he's carried away] Ha! I've got your hat! Take that, Hatless! Now go back to the quad and resume your hacky-sack tournee! I'm not going to lie down for some frat-boy bastard with his damn Teva sandals and his Skoal bandits and his Abercrombie & Fitch long-sleeved, open-stitch, crew-neck Henley smoking his sticky-buds out of a soda can while watching his favorite downloaded "Simpsons" episodes every night! Yes, we all love "Mr. Plow." Oh, you've got the song memorized, do you? [shouts]
Stewie Griffin: So does everyone else! That is *exactly* the kind of idiot you see at Taco Bell at one in the morning! The guy who just whiffed his way down the bar-skank ladder!
Movie: Guy
Larry Hubbard: [Reading what he's written for his novel] "Soon the primal fire began to burn in Lady Hookstraten's body. Her hips twitched and trembled as each fireball from Oliver's powerful cannon erupted like molten lava into the quivering mouth of her ever-fluttering love purse."
Movie: Guy
Machine: You have 113 new messages [Phone starts to beep]
Lois Griffin: Oh my!
Old Man: Uh, yeah, I was just wondering, uh... where the newspaper boy was. [beep]
Old Man: Haven't seen the newspaper in a couple days. Wonderin' if he ever gonna come back. [beep]
Old Man: Guess who? Sorry to leave you so many messages. Just lonely here. Thinkin' about the muscly-armed paperboy. Wishin' he'd come by and bring me some good news. [beep]
Old Man: Where are you? [beep]
Old Man: Ah, you're starting to piss me off, you little piggly son of a *****. Call me.
Lois Griffin: Oh my!
Old Man: Uh, yeah, I was just wondering, uh... where the newspaper boy was. [beep]
Old Man: Haven't seen the newspaper in a couple days. Wonderin' if he ever gonna come back. [beep]
Old Man: Guess who? Sorry to leave you so many messages. Just lonely here. Thinkin' about the muscly-armed paperboy. Wishin' he'd come by and bring me some good news. [beep]
Old Man: Where are you? [beep]
Old Man: Ah, you're starting to piss me off, you little piggly son of a *****. Call me.
Movie: Guy
Michelle Rubin: Oh, you are never going to pull this off.
Andie: Watch me. Tonight, I'll hook a guy. Tomorrow, pull the switch. Before the ten days are up, I'm going to have this guy running for his life.
Jeannie Ashcroft: You're not going to burn his apartment down or bite him, or anything?
Andie: No! I'm going to limit myself to doing everything girls do wrong in relationships. Basically, everything we know guys hate. I'll be clingy, needy...
Jeannie Ashcroft: Be touchy-feely.
Andie: Yeah.
Jeannie Ashcroft: Ooh, call him in the middle of the night and tell him everything you had to eat that day.
Michelle Rubin: What's wrong with that? [Andie & Jeanie stare at Michelle]
Michelle Rubin: I'm kidding.
Andie: Watch me. Tonight, I'll hook a guy. Tomorrow, pull the switch. Before the ten days are up, I'm going to have this guy running for his life.
Jeannie Ashcroft: You're not going to burn his apartment down or bite him, or anything?
Andie: No! I'm going to limit myself to doing everything girls do wrong in relationships. Basically, everything we know guys hate. I'll be clingy, needy...
Jeannie Ashcroft: Be touchy-feely.
Andie: Yeah.
Jeannie Ashcroft: Ooh, call him in the middle of the night and tell him everything you had to eat that day.
Michelle Rubin: What's wrong with that? [Andie & Jeanie stare at Michelle]
Michelle Rubin: I'm kidding.
Movie: Guy