Grudge Match Quotes

[from trailer] Lightning: Hey Webster, show a little respect!
Dante Slate, Jr.: I choose to believe that you just called me Webster because of my dictionary-sized vocabulary, NOT because of my height and race!
Lightning: Nope, it's because you're short and black!
Dante Slate, Jr.: What was Jesus like? I'm curious. Was he cool?

Movie: Grudge Match
Dante Slate, Jr.: I can get you a part in Hangover 4!
Evander Holyfield: I'm listening.
Mike Tyson: You sonofabitch! [goes for Slate]
Dante Slate, Jr.: Wait, WAIT, WAIT!
Evander Holyfield: Guard your ears!

Movie: Grudge Match
[from trailer][Sharp throws a punch at a side of beef] Lightning: HEY! What'cha doing? We're just here to buy a little dinner! You don't have to punch everything!

Movie: Grudge Match
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: Where's Frankie?
Mikey: [Distracted from reading]Frankie's not coming till later. I'm your trainer, Mikey.
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: [looking at a fat man]You can't be my trainer. Maybe I believe you ATE my trainer
Mikey: [Knowing he's been insulted]Nice.

Movie: Grudge Match
[Lightning brings a bucket of horse urine for Razor] Henry 'Razor' Sharp: I'm not putting my hands in horse urine!
Lightning: So you're telling me you're a better boxer than Jack Dempsey? Every day, Jack Dempsey would soak his hands in horse urine! And nobody ever had a tougher punch than Jack Dempsey!
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: [resigned]Did you heat it up? Or is it fresh? [dips his fists in the bucket]
Lightning: It's vinegar, I'm kidding!... It's urine! [Razor pulls his fist out]
Lightning: It's vinegar! [in]
Lightning: It's urine! [out]
Lightning: It's vinegar! [in]
Lightning: It's urine! [out]
Lightning: It's vinegar! [in]
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Hey, come on!

Movie: Grudge Match
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: I banged his girlfriend. It was an error in judgement, look how it turned out... [walks off]
Dante Slate, Jr.: This is some white people shit...

Movie: Grudge Match
[Razor and Kid end up in prison] Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Will one of you hurry up and rape this guy already?

Movie: Grudge Match
Dante Slate, Jr.: Come on, Evander! So the man went batshit and bit your ear off, it's not like he enjoyed it!
Mike Tyson: It tasted like ass!
Dante Slate, Jr.: Hear that? You didn't taste good!

Movie: Grudge Match
[at a skydiving stunt, Razor shoves Kid out of the plane] Dante Slate, Jr.: You threw his old ass out the plane! [Dante breaks into laughter]
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Why are you laughing?
Dante Slate, Jr.: I forgot to tell you, first one down gets an extra five grand.
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Shit! [jumps out]

Movie: Grudge Match
[from trailer] Dante Slate, Jr.: I got a copy that wants an official rematch, they'll pay you a hundred grand!
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Well, I can't be in the same room as that guy. It's not worth it.
Dante Slate, Jr.: The hell you mean, it ain't worth it? I'm looking at your house!

Movie: Grudge Match
Dante Slate, Jr.: [his feet in a bucket]I gotta wash this vinegar off my feet. This is strong vinegar, it smells awful. This vinegar went bad! [Lightning grins]

Movie: Grudge Match
[from trailer] Lightning: [splashes water on Razor]Time to train!
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: What have I done?

Movie: Grudge Match
[as the fight starts] Henry 'Razor' Sharp: [to the Kid]Gutsy move, going without a bra!
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: [to Razor]Yeah? I got a surprise for you: I took a dump on your porch!

Movie: Grudge Match
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Listen, uh, your thing. Turn it down.
Lightning: Oh, the hearing aid. Goddamn thing drives me crazy, feels like R2-freaking-D2!

Movie: Grudge Match
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: Hey, you made me wait 30 years to prove to the world I could kick your ass! And that's what I'm going to do, kick your ass!
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: You gotta move on!
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: What, move on?
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Move on!
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: Now that you got her, you want me to move on? And what do I got? Nothing, nothing!

Movie: Grudge Match
Trey: What does BJ stand for?
B.J.: [embarrassed about his name]Uh...
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: Trey, BJ stands for Butterscotch and Jellybeans.
Trey: I like butterscotch and jellybeans!

Movie: Grudge Match
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Look at us!
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: Yeah, look at us! We're not dead! Everyone's laughing at us! The whole world's laughing at us! But we're not dead! In fact, I feel more alive now than I ever felt!

Movie: Grudge Match
B.J.: [to Kid]You know, I was pissed off at my mom for not telling me about you, but I can see she was right about you.

Movie: Grudge Match
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: [sees Kid on Dancing with the Stars]Now I wish I was blind in both eyes...

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Lightning: [unwilling to have a male nurse]What kind of man knowingly takes a job where he's gotta wash another man's balls?
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: He's a hero a far as I'm concerned, pal.

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Dante Slate, Jr.: You don't know what a video game is? Exactly when did they unfreeze you, Captain America?
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Captain America? You know, I could take you down a peg or two... but it looks like someone beat me to it.

Movie: Grudge Match
Lightning: Why don't you have a TV? I watch Dancing with the Stars! I'm an old man, I need to watch Dancing with the Stars!

Movie: Grudge Match
Dante Slate, Jr.: We are in Kardashian sex tape money, baby!

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Lightning: Call it! [throws a coin in the air]
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Hey, I never saw it coming, come on... [Lightning raises a hand, and slaps him]
Lightning: When were you going to tell me you were blind in one eye?

Movie: Grudge Match
[last lines] Lightning: [on the phone]Bullshit! Fix! Who paid off those judges?
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Light! Light, we WON!
Lightning: What? Who did? What?
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: We won!
Lightning: We won? Get the hell out of here!
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Heh, no!
Lightning: Goddamn hearing aid!

Movie: Grudge Match
B.J.: He's blind!
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: What? How do you know?
B.J.: My mother told me!... What, you think she made it up? You've been hammering him since the fight began!

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Henry 'Razor' Sharp: [during a casino promotion]Didn't you lose twenty thousand dollars betting here?
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: Yeah, well, who loses the SuperBowl four times in a row?

Movie: Grudge Match
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: You know, women are more verbal than men.
Sally Rose: Women are more verbal than men?
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Yeah, I read it in a magazine article: Women are More Verbal than Men.

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Lightning: You got an iPad?
Henry 'Razor' Sharp: Nah, I got a regular couch.

Movie: Grudge Match
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: [as BJ is walking away]Hey, what's BJ stand for? Hah?
B.J.: Bradley James. Stands for Bradley James. But I just... I like BJ.
Billy 'The Kid' McDonnen: We all do, kid. But it's one thing to get one and it's another to be called one.

Movie: Grudge Match