Desperate Housewives Quote
Counselor: "This is your third group session, but you have yet to share anything. Come on, talk to us. How's your marriage?"
Gabrielle: "Shaky, at best."
Counselor: "And why is that?"
Gabrielle: "I don't know. I hired a brilliant lawyer to get my husband out of this hellhole, and he fired him for no reason at all."
Counselor: "Carlos?"
Carlos: "I just didn't like him."
Gabrielle: "Why not? He's experienced, he's intelligent, he's successful."
Carlos: "Exactly! I'd prefer an attorney you didn't find so damn appealing."
Gabrielle: "Oh, my god. You fired him because you're jealous?"
Carlos: "Don't I have the right to? You know, she cheated on me."
(Bob, who was also there having a group session, gasps)
Gabrielle: "Oh, Bob. You beat your wife. You are so not allowed to gasp."
Lisa: "Don't you talk that way to him!"
Gabrielle: "One more word out of you, Lisa, and I will backhand you myself."
Counselor: "Okay, calm down."
Carlos: "Thousands of fat, bald attorneys out there in the world, and she's gotta get the one that looks like an underwear model."
Gabrielle: "I'm not discussing this anymore. You can rot in here for all I care."
Counselor: "So, um... Mona, what do you feel are the biggest problems in your marriage?"
Gabrielle: (interrupting) "By the way, he was wearing a suit. How do you know he had a good body?!"
Carlos: "Do you know?"
Gabrielle: "No!"
Mona's Husband: "I bet he's hot."
(everyone stops what they were doing)
Mona: "Do I need to say what our biggest problem is, or can everybody figure it out for themselves?"
Gabrielle: "Shaky, at best."
Counselor: "And why is that?"
Gabrielle: "I don't know. I hired a brilliant lawyer to get my husband out of this hellhole, and he fired him for no reason at all."
Counselor: "Carlos?"
Carlos: "I just didn't like him."
Gabrielle: "Why not? He's experienced, he's intelligent, he's successful."
Carlos: "Exactly! I'd prefer an attorney you didn't find so damn appealing."
Gabrielle: "Oh, my god. You fired him because you're jealous?"
Carlos: "Don't I have the right to? You know, she cheated on me."
(Bob, who was also there having a group session, gasps)
Gabrielle: "Oh, Bob. You beat your wife. You are so not allowed to gasp."
Lisa: "Don't you talk that way to him!"
Gabrielle: "One more word out of you, Lisa, and I will backhand you myself."
Counselor: "Okay, calm down."
Carlos: "Thousands of fat, bald attorneys out there in the world, and she's gotta get the one that looks like an underwear model."
Gabrielle: "I'm not discussing this anymore. You can rot in here for all I care."
Counselor: "So, um... Mona, what do you feel are the biggest problems in your marriage?"
Gabrielle: (interrupting) "By the way, he was wearing a suit. How do you know he had a good body?!"
Carlos: "Do you know?"
Gabrielle: "No!"
Mona's Husband: "I bet he's hot."
(everyone stops what they were doing)
Mona: "Do I need to say what our biggest problem is, or can everybody figure it out for themselves?"
TV Show: Desperate Housewives
