Death to Smoochy Quotes

Reporter: How does it feel to be voted the most hated man in America, Randolph?
Randolph: In a country full of Neanderthals, I wear the ****in' badge of honor.

Movie: Death to Smoochy
Burke: It's all about the dough, Shel. Once you get the money, you get the power. Once you get the power, you can have Smoochy walk out there with a dildo strapped to his head if you want.
Sheldon: [long pause] I don't think I've thought of that idea specifically, but I? I do see where you're going with this.

Movie: Death to Smoochy
Bartender: I never saw anyone get buzzed off of orange juice.
Sheldon: Let me tell you a secret - if you squirt a little liquid alfalfa in, it's blast off time.

Movie: Death to Smoochy
Nora: We know you didn't kill Spinner so just cool your jets.
Randolph: Oh, thank you, Mother Teresa, why don't you tell that to the angry mob outside? They want my ****ing ass. I'm like a god damn toaster at Macy's; Rainbow's ass - aisle three.

Movie: Death to Smoochy
Randolph: Bastard Son of Barney! Die! Die, stuffed ball of fluff! Illegitimate Teletubbie! Die, you Muppet from hell! Die, you foam mother****er!

Movie: Death to Smoochy
Randolph: You better grow eyes in the back of your head, you horned piece of ****, because I'm not gonna sleep until worms are crawling up your foam-rubber ass! I'm goin' on safari mother****er! SAH-FAR-I! [rhino noise]

Movie: Death to Smoochy