A Bag of Hammers Quotes

Amanda: I was ready to share forever with you, but did you care? No. You'd rather share it with him, and steal, steal, steal! Alan, Alan, Alan! I mean, was I just some hole for you? What does he have that I don't?
Ben: Uh, well, an indoor voice.

Movie: A Bag of Hammers
Ben: We all get a bag of hammers. You know what I mean? I mean, whether it's being poor, or catching cancer, divorce, losing your brother - losing your mother... You know what I mean, Kelsey? It's... Well, but the thing is th-tha... The thing IS is what you do with these hammers when you get 'em, 'cause that's what shows you what kind of a man you are, even if you're not ready to be one yet.

Movie: A Bag of Hammers
Alan: I don't know how you could come here every day.
Melanie: It's easy. I go to... I get up in the morning. I go to work. That's it.
Alan: So do I. That's it.
Melanie: No, what you do isn't work. It's...
Alan: Well, it pays my bills - and sometimes yours.

Movie: A Bag of Hammers
Wyatt: Look, you may not understand this, but this is the best thing for you, okay?
Kelsey: They wanted me.
Wyatt: They couldn't take care of you, Kelsey.
Kelsey: No one has *ever* wanted me before. But they wanted me.
Wyatt: It's not enough.
Kelsey: Yes it is!

Movie: A Bag of Hammers
Alan: You don't... you don't hug anyone. You hugged a ho... a hobo?
Ben: Yeah. First I gave her all my money.

Movie: A Bag of Hammers
Marty: It's endlessly fucked up to me that you steal cars from dead people.
Alan: They're not dead people.
Ben: Yeah, they're dead people's relatives.
Marty: I remember when you were nice boys.

Movie: A Bag of Hammers
Ben: What do we look like? Criminals?
Melanie: Nah. Well, looks can be deceiving.
Ben: That's precisely why we're so successful.

Movie: A Bag of Hammers
Melanie: You've got to be kidding me.
Alan: Says the girl who's wearing a waffle.

Movie: A Bag of Hammers
Melanie: Hey, Marty.
Marty: [to his buddy]This is it.
Melanie: What can I get you?
Marty: A side of you. [shows her a ring]

Movie: A Bag of Hammers
Alan: [holding a condom package]Kelsey, we sat you down today because we wanted to talk to you about...
Ben: [holding a banana]... something very important.
Alan: First of all, what happens in Penthouse doesn't happen in real life.
Ben: It never looks that good. You don't want to get a girl pregnant before your, um, in love with her.
Alan: And ready to start a life... with her.
Ben: Yes. And each time you have sex, you are risking marriage.

Movie: A Bag of Hammers