This Is the End Quotes

Danny McBride: [about Jay]If anyone's raping Emma Watson, it's fucking Sir-Rapes-A-Lot over here.

Movie: This Is the End
Danny McBride: I know why you guys don't fucking call me or hang out with me anymore. It's cause I party so fucking hard. Always have. Ever since I was a baby, I wouldn't just suck on my mama's titties, I would fucking bang 'em and motorboat 'em. Everything I've been doing has just been a cry for help. When I came on your magazine, James, it was a cum for help. I've just been crying and cumming and crying and cumming. Tears from the tip of my penis, dudes.
James Franco: I'm sorry, alright. You can cum wherever you want.
Danny McBride: I don't even care about cumming anymore. Right now I'm just kind of into going.

Movie: This Is the End
Seth Rogen: Jay, are you serious right now? That's your fucking plan? You're gonna repeat lines from the exorcist?
Jay Baruchel: I would assume they did their fucking research.
Seth Rogen: It's a movie!
Jay Baruchel: It's a manual. It's a fucking training manual.

Movie: This Is the End
Jay Baruchel: [after encountering Satan]Oh, you've got to be fucking SHITTING me!

Movie: This Is the End
Jonah Hill: Guys, guys, guys. Jay's not rapey, Jay couldn't rape a fly.

Movie: This Is the End
James Franco: You know what, Danny? If you weren't jizzing all the time, maybe you would be more hydrated!
Danny McBride: You're making me into a joke right now, Franco, and you are not gonna like the fucking punchline!

Movie: This Is the End
Jay Baruchel: [about to exorcise Jonah Hill]Jonah Hill.
Possessed Jonah Hill: Jonah Hill is no more.
Jay Baruchel: Demon!
Possessed Jonah Hill: Yes!
Seth Rogen: Fuck. That's not good.

Movie: This Is the End
[after finding James' secret stash of food] Craig Robinson: What the fuck is all this, Franco?
James Franco: Uh... it looks like food! How'd that get there?
Seth Rogen: What? You have more food?
Craig Robinson: You knew he had extra food?
Seth Rogen: He gave me one cracker!
Craig Robinson: I would have sucked a dick for half a cracker!
James Franco: Alright, well, maybe I didn't want you to suck my dick, alright!
Craig Robinson: I didn't want to suck it! That's the point of what I said!

Movie: This Is the End
Seth Rogen: It's already going crazy out there, guys! We can't leave. I'm not leaving. Okay? I'm a victim! I've had a victim's mentality my whole life, people can smell it on me! When I was a kid, I had man titties. The bullies held me down, they titty fucked me!
James Franco: That's what's happening out there right now!
Craig Robinson: We are all soft.
Seth Rogen: Yeah.
Craig Robinson: We are all soft! We are actors, we pretend to be hard, man! We soft as baby shit!
James Franco: As baby shit!

Movie: This Is the End
[after a man gets his head cut off and everyone is freaking out and kicking his head around] Jonah Hill: Stop! You guys! This man was alive a few seconds ago, we can't play soccer with his head!
James Franco: Pick it up, Jonah! [Jonah picks up the head and blood pours out and he drops it]
Jonah Hill: Oh, God! He blinked at me!

Movie: This Is the End
Seth Rogen: [after falling through a hole in the house]I broke my ass in half.

Movie: This Is the End
[after Jay punches Jonah] James Franco: Jonah, you okay?
Jonah Hill: Yeah... his insides hurt worse than my outsides.

Movie: This Is the End
Craig Robinson: Yo, so, I just drank my own pee for the first time... and... [laughs]
Craig Robinson: it ain't bad. I never thought to do it, I always thought, you know, pee stink, whatever, but... Shh. [holds up a cocktail glass filled with pee]

Movie: This Is the End
Possessed Jonah Hill: [holding Seth down]I'm gonna titty fuck you, Seth.
Seth Rogen: Don't titty fuck me!
Possessed Jonah Hill: What are they, big B's or small C's? I'm gonna push your titties together. PUSH THEM TOGETHER!

Movie: This Is the End