The Sarah Silverman Program. Quotes

Clerk: A girl ripped me off. She's getting away. She's a white female, kind of jewy but totally hot, not out of your league hot, just cute. Long neck, really nice skin, she could easily pass for 20.

Movie: The Sarah Silverman Program.
Fred Blorth: [opens a gift] Food!
Sarah Silverman: I remember how you said you wanted some, so...

Movie: The Sarah Silverman Program.
Sarah Silverman: I just tried to be like the others / But I pooped instead / I tried to join in with my brothers / I pooped instead / And I wish it never happened, that's what I wish / And I also wish so many things...
Sarah Silverman: I wish every child had a mother / That's what I wish / I wish we could love one another / If I had one wish / And I wish all the nations belonged to one world / And I wish all religion was love.
Sarah Silverman: And I wish the retarded... were re-smarted / That's what I wish. [fade to white]
Black God: Hello, Sarah.
Sarah Silverman: Are you God's black friend?
Black God: Sarah, your song was so passionate, so selfless. It has risen above the sound of a billion prayers. I want you to pick one wish, and I will grant it. All you have to do is choose. [Sarah nods, fade to white]
Steve: I heard brunch is an escape from - [farts]
All: Ew!
Brian: See, I always thought it was more a matter of - [farts]
All: Gross!
Sarah Silverman: You guys are both wrong. According to Newsweek, brunch comes from the Latin - [farts]

Movie: The Sarah Silverman Program.
Sarah Silverman: So Tig, tell us about yourself. Pour us a piping hot cup of Tig!
Tig: Well, I'm a lesbian...
Officer Jay McPherson: Which is fine! Ya know, cause nobody cares.
Sarah Silverman: What *is* a lesbian? Ya know, what is anything? What's a unicorn? It's a horse with a horn on it's head that's magic... Ya know, a lesbian is just a woman with a horn on her head... that's magic...

Movie: The Sarah Silverman Program.